Rumors are that it’s finally happening…

Genuinely surprised that a breakfast burrito set off TSA in the Denver airport 🌯

Are they beta testing JD for crazy? Testing him to see if he has what it takes to shit the news cycle on demand? I don’t think he’s-a-craven-power-mad-shill is enough to explain his gleeful popesplaining.

Student in my American Revolution class figured out he was related to Amos Doolittle. Suggested we all pick a little Doolittle guy and get class tattoos. And I’m like, you know, they’re actually pretty cute…

In case you were wondering: Five and a half hours is not enough sleep.

America having a normal one today.

Doing things takes so much time.

I can’t stop watching. Can you imagine unleashing this kind of joy back into our lives? Working on my dance moves already 💃🪩🕺

Inject this into my veins.

Dude, does he even know what a Pope is?

It also makes them sound more tough and macho than they actually are. We need something that clearly communicates that they literally had to invent a girl who would be willing to talk with them.

The more I read about AI as both a business and an applied technology, the more I’m convinced we have been utterly conned.

Picture of the century. 😍 📷 credit: Science Tube

Latest right-wing freak out is . . . <checks notes> . . . not enough teen age girls are getting pregnant?

Hear me out: Maybe we should start electing people who don’t commit so many crimes.

Is it really that hard to just not commit crimes?

The best thing in the world: Getting an email from an undergrad telling you they are "currently down a rabbit hole" with their research project.

If men have retreated from the job market because they’ve Joe Roganed themselves into thinking that the only acceptable jobs for men are podcasting or selling supplements, then it’s up to them claw their way out.

Once again learned today that I cannot make it through a lecture on Loving v. Virginia without a small meltdown.

Wait, so now corporations are all in on DEI if it means marginalizing all their queer employees and customers? I guess I'll go back to Peet's now. sf.gazetteer.co/philz-ceo-or...

Hey. Cool. I knew her in grad school!

Meanwhile, Congress is sitting around wondering how the price of gas is polling and sending out fundraising texts…

I literally could not love these people more.

At the very least, can y’all just tie him to a chair and spoon feed him for the next couple years?

one undercooked big mac is all we need

You'll never get magic like this with AI.

A student just described the Articles of Confederation as thirteen different countries in a trench coat pretending to be one country and I don't think I will ever recover.

Y'all there is a woman and a black man circling the moon and NASA's mission control+ science teams are so diverse and people are nerding out about science and exploration this is all a gigantic middle finger to the stupid and hate and grotesque ghouls running our country

Y’all: Literally everything he says is bullshit. Stop treating it like it’s anything else.

Watching a livestream from space has me deep in my feels 🚀🌖

Controversial hot take: Straight people are exhausting.

For here Am I sitting in a tin can Far above the world Planet Earth is blue And there's nothing I can do

If you’re not following along, NASA’s Artemis II wake-up playlist is the best thing ever.

You know they’re going to Weekend At Bernie’s this shit as long as they can.

It’s hard to find ways to celebrate things since I’ve mostly stopped drinking. My partner said we should bake a cake. So, now I’m thinking a lot about the appropriate cake.

Finding myself thinking a lot about when “it” will happen lately.

Artemis II Commander Reid Wiseman took this picture of Earth from the Orion spacecraft after completing the translunar injection burn. There are two auroras (top right & bottom left) and zodiacal light (bottom right) is visible as the Earth eclipses the Sun. 🧪🔭 #Artemis www.nasa.gov/image-articl...

Exactly.

How does one become an expert in Waffle House teleportation? Asking for a friend.

This wouldn’t be such an awful time to be alive if it weren’t for everyone in charge and all that they’re doing.

Is it possible that we’re all born with a finite amount of bandwidth and once you’ve used all yours up you just drag yourself through the rest of your life like an empty husk? Asking for a friend.

Apparently, I am live tweeting my mental health today.

And how do you tell the difference between clinical depression and the end of the semester?

I know it’s sort of my job, but I’m just too fucking tired to fully grasp the stupidity of the domicile test.

Stop it. Just stop it.

No matter how much it's talked about, it's still not talked about enough that the Supreme Court agreed to hear a case on whether the words in the 14th amendment mean what the words in the 14th amendment mean.

Omg don’t do this to us.

Is there anything written about female spies during the American Revolution that isn’t crap? Off the top of my head, I got nothing.

Lord, help me survive Bradford Pear season.