Imagine the wildly racist things republicans would have to say if Michelle Obama spoke in the same broken english...

Taco Tuesday! 🌮

WE GOT THE OLD KANYE 😭🙌

The art of the deal! Lmao

If you think I’m going to war cuz a draft-dodger changed the rules, come kiss my ass at my new Canadian address 💋

WNBA players locked in a 450% pay increase across the board. Good shit, get yo bag ladies! 👏🏻

It’s gotta be illegal for a company to make an employee resign the handbook every time they update it no? Like that’s not how it works

Orange man want forbidden syrup

So, the guy who openly joked about being able to pause elections during wartime, and tried to pack extra Republican seats in Texas, is now saying the war he started on the same week of the Texas primaries is going to stretch longer than his SoD suggests? Expect this war to stretch to November

Hypothetically… Would it be possible to task ai agents with mass clicking paid ads to burn a companies ad budget, tank sales & skew target audience data?

The president contradicting his own Sec of Defense on the length of this war smells a lot like reaching for any excuse to pause midterms

The idea of the United States "war room" setup in Mar-a-lago is so South Park.

If only we had some sort of deal with Iran about not allowing ownership of nuclear weapons. If only…

Never forgive the morons that let a draft dodger drag us into war.

Workday doodle ✏️

I’m one track away from finalizing this project I’ve been playing with for a year. It feels so good to be making music again.

These days a “family owned” business doesn’t mean the same quality service from yesteryear - it indicates an elaborate daycare for the nepo child now at the wheel.

I’d punch a monkey for Punch the Monkey

Lmao two of his own appointees voted against him. 🤣

Taking bets on what headline breaks first: - WW3 - Trump caught on Tape - Aliens

The gas station hot dogs that have been on the rollers all day:

Thank you all for just being yourselves. It’s what this world needs most.

Working from home for over four years now, I can probably count the day I haven’t eaten on the clock and nap on my lunch on my hands. Never going back

Mfers turn thirty and make their new found food intolerance their whole personality

It shouldn’t be illegal to be a billionaire. But, if you can afford the fortification of a small army, it also should not be illegal to hunt you.

If MAGA doesn't mind the disenfranchising of voters segments that don't align with their agenda... fine. But when reason re-enters the room, I think anybody caught trying to storm a capital to reject an election's results should have their voting rights revoked for life based on judgement.

Last time I saw such a lousy excuse for Patriots was on January 6th

Something’s feels missing with a warm & sunny Superbowl

The dog whistle sounds like a foghorn

BREAKING: Suburban white woman who takes vacations to Mexico every summer says Bad Bunny doesn’t belong at the Super Bowl

It’s really easy to do business without being a shitty person

I’m realizing I don’t like murder docs for the shock and morbidity but more for the understanding of the detective process and how the cases unfold. Are there any good crime doc/channels that detail cases by evidence and timeline as opposed to highlighting the horrifying crimes themselves?

Eh hem

This was posted in the new Epstein files release and removed about 20 mins later. Wonder why that is.

They’ve been caught doctoring, removing and shuffling in misleading documents. There is no doubt we are only getting *half* of the remaining documents because they’ve now had a chance to remove any incriminating material. I fucking hate it here.

We get 3 million more Epstein documents… now that they’ve had time to comb out you know who. 😏

*turns on heating blanket for my cats*

Nothing but respect to my fellow Americans meeting ICE at the front lines, witnessing the horrors, handling the fear & still being the bigger people. The administration is desperate for clips of lawless rioting and yall have given them ZERO ammunition. You, beautiful patriots. 🫶🏻🇺🇸

Rural America is crazy cuz why do I know more pig Latin than actual Latin? I took two years of Spanish…

As a Michigander, I hereby formally a request to become a territory of Canada. My brothers and sisters to the north, please…

The cell phone camera is going to go down as the single greatest tool against authoritarianism

MAGA when they see boots:

You don’t get to champion Kyle Rittenhouse then tell us a single fucking thing about armed protestors

The irony of a Patriots Super Bowl during the rise of fascism is not lost on me

Where do I get a team jersey for “Natural Causes”??

PAID. Just closed out the biggest freelance gig of my career (so far). 😌

HE IS STARTING SHIT TO INVOKE THE INSURRECTION ACT THEN NEVER LEAVE.

Dish it but can’t take it mfers bug me

He wants Greenland to defend itself. He wants protestors to antagonize. He wants sew as much hatred as it takes. He wants any cause to invoke the Insurrection Act.

Everything… is about him.