You mean the guy who pardoned all his supporters for storming the capital chanting to hang his own VP after losing the last time, is only *joking* about pausing elections? Can we please be serious and start putting adults back in the room? Please.

Gifted the prize? Congrats on the first Nobel Participation Trophy 🏆

Exactly.

Your dream home comes with a neighbors yard that’s twice as green

They should bake edibles in cereal form. Toys in the box a must.

It’s crazy to me some people go their whole adult lives without creating anything. No judgment. But making something all your own and putting it out in the world is a unique experience I think everyone should feel.

Whiskey Neat cuz it’s FUCK ICE

Mayor Jacob Frey: "They are already trying to spin this as an action of self defense. Having seen the video myself, I want to tell everybody directly that is bullshit."

If I was a billionaire I would buy all the ad space during the Super Bowl to air live nature cams during the breaks... and then pay the proper amount of taxes.

That cold, dry time of year I start using Neosporin as hand lotion

The only way art works is if you’re having fun with it

I guess invading Venezuela is one way to bring down gas prices…

Paint me as the villain, I’m just happy you’re painting.

I just want to take a moment to thank you all for making this lil corner of the internet feel welcoming & warm. Take care of yourselves 🫶🏻

15+ years as a professional, I’ve never worked for a boss that wasn’t in someway related to the founder of the company. It’s telling.

One day i want to live in a quiet ranch on a river and rescue a cow.

(Bad) Hunter’s Jacket 🦌 Painted by me!

Merry Christmas to my fellow leftist scum 🥰

Took a shot at upgrading g this old hunting jacket my dad gave me 🎯

Growing up is finally having the free time to play videogames all day, but the anxiety to not enjoy it.

It would have been easier to just unblack the parts of docs they wanted to disclose. What a fucking joke.

Get you a friend that purs the whole nap together.

Jack Smith bombshell, Epstein docs due, tariffs falling on its face… He is almost certainly calling on this Venezuela war to stoke a war to cancel elections.

I hate when women assume a coworker makes more than them just because he’s a man… Like, he could be the son of the owner.

It is undeniable that the *sole* reason most republicans went full MAGA is that the previous president was black. This is what it allllll boils down to.

But city owned grocery stores in NY is socialism

They must’ve forgot to take attendance on Jan 6th

Airport tip: You can pet the kid on the leash but you have to ask their parent first.

Can’t see how Trump Accounts could possibly short these kids futures?

Father Time’s got a dad joke he’s saving.

Prolly said it before, but I think the closest I’ll ever come to hitting the lotto is locking down a 3% mortgage on our first home.

Just a reminder that nobody has more control over your happiness than you. Don’t rob your own joy to fulfill others.

Checking investments to see if u can retire yet

Imagine needing billions of dollars to engineer a personality and it’s still shitty lol

Fucking hilarious Elon exposed his own platform as a Russian propaganda machine! Very smart fella

WARNING: A dangerous new form of MDMA is ravaging the metal scene! It’s several times more potent and hardly detectable from the regular form. Officials are calling it “Static Ecstasy”.

Marjorie is only acting righteous now that she’s learned the hard way Trump only supports pretty young blondes. Lol

Thank god Pelosi is retiring. If the Dems end this shut down without full unredacted Epstein files for the public, it is an absolute death knell for Schumer’s career. Get these old spineless sacks of wrinkles out of our party.

*yawn* “Sleepy Joe!” *yawn*

Personally, I see this logo in my mind over this whole administration. The person. The con. The people who buy it. When he’s gone, put this watermark on his presidential portrait.

For a generation that has watched CEO’s outgrow the working class pay by 1200%, taxing the top 1% for the betterment of the 99% should not be controversial.

This is his reaction time? No way that ear shot wasn’t staged.

I hope that fat orange fuck had a miserable evening

Lmao the establishment got DOG WALKED tonight

Cautiously optimistic - this feels like we could see a blue tidal wave of change thanks to this abhorrent and embarrassing administration.

What Republicans, and old gaurd Dems, are scared of is change - and proving it is for the better. Mamdani proved tonight that the people are ready for it.

It's probably a bad sign when Margarine Tailored Jeans is making the most sense of all Republicans

It would be so cool if just *once* reporters stonewalled the Tangerine until he cites a single fact to support lie after lie. smfh

What are they “conserving” again?

Make Adolescents Goon Again 🇺🇸