Fuckety-bye.

My Substack is out: bittertonic.substack.com/p/apocalypso

Peter gives up Labour Party membership as though the time is right, when there he was pissing against George Osborne's wall after a jolly at his house - and both on Deripaska's yacht in Corfu. Yet ordinary Labour members were suspended, blocked, punished by the Starmerism that hired Peter.

The former prince was known as Randy Andy in the 80s. Spitting Image made a satire centrefold of him reclining with a string of sausages between his legs, and a single B-side called 'Just A Prince Who Can't Say No' (look up the lyrics). This was 1984.

All these faux statements of shock. Most people I knew when working at MMU didn't like that Mandelson the snake was at the top. Everyone knew he was 'of the night.' Are you telling me management had no idea? Starmer saying 'ooh he lied I'm so shocked.' Nobody else is.

Maybe even he should have bought a bungalow.

The times are bleak but the fall of Peter Mandelson is delicious. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

Goodnight.

My Substack is out: bittertonic.substack.com/p/digital-shit

Farage the great pro-British interests patriot and anti-globalist anti-Davos stalwart goes to Davos to advise Iranian. I don't particularly care, but I assume the chest-beating reformist I'm not racist buts should. Or is he just an old fashioned hypocrite having them for useful idiots? Answer = yes.

My Substack is out, I'll be posting on Fridays and the odd thing in-between. Give me a follow if you're interested in what you read: substack.com/home/post/p-...

I feel the need to get some new boots in the cupboard, because the King of Denmark is about to bollock Trump and prices prices prices. Is it the 19th Century now? Or maybe the 18th? The 17th?

I've been umming and arring about Substack. Finally done it, all follows welcome: bittertonic.substack.com/p/confuse-an...

As I said four months ago, total waste of time.

Neoreactionary architecture.

Farage will sell your grandmother for £100. www.theguardian.com/politics/202...

JD Vance, I've decided that Pennsylvania is essential to my interests. I'm sure you'll enjoy telling Governor Shapiro and entourage to fuck off for me before I move my tatty old stuff in then declare it Hannsylvania. What do you mean no? I thought you would admire my world spirit on horseback style.

Apparently Peter Thiel recently described Greta Thunberg and tech/AI critics generally as 'legionnaires of the Antichrist' and Trump as an 'imperfect instrument' of God's will. A single lifetime on from WW2 and suddenly it's Louis XIV meets Bladerunner. There's no progress, gradual or otherwise.

If I no longer own a mobile phone I won't be able to lose it in the house again.

'As useful to society as fleas to a dead dog.'

'A generation of the unteachable is hanging upon us like a necklace of corpses.'

Orwell: 'Nothing was more desolating [...] than the way in which the whole of the older generation conspired to pretend that it was the war of 1914-18 over again. All the old duds were back on the job, twenty years older, with the skull plainer in their faces,' it 'was like a tea-party of ghosts.'

We will administer the new nappy poo scraper until a reasonable handover to the catering company can be facilitated. If negotiations fail - due to the catering company's refusal to end their scotch egg supply - the scraper will remain in the toddler arsenal and poo scraping will continue.

The funeral buffet provided an opportunity to acquire a new nappy poo scraper. The item was trousered at 14.10 and in place just after 16.45.

SPOILER ALERT: China wins in the end.

Sorry to hear you are struggling with this: the answer is 'fuck off Donald.'

Well, Starmer has refused the US line on Greenland, to be fair to him. Watch on!

There's something about this which speak to the condition of the whole country.

I look forward to Starmer bluffing through Greenland's annexation, his buttocks together like pincers. His background in law give him no excuse. A plastic man who sees himself as a moral good, in the wrong place at the wrong time. I used to compare him to the Asterix bard at the feast. Get it yet?

And the prize for the best Christmas card goes to...

Around 1.8 million people watch Bob Mortimer and Paul Whitehouse review old episodes of a programme in which they go fishing. It seems like something produced by a few FE students in a provincial college. I know I don't live here, but is this really where everyone else lives?

Christmas. One enters a land of permatelevision. This brings questions like 'what is this Claudia Winkleman and does it have MBE tattooed under its fringe?' Perhaps she is like Mariella Frostrup who, as Half Man Half Biscuit sang, 'does lots of voiceovers and nothing much else but seems to get by.'

@martinrowson.bsky.social Keep it brutal in '26 you're the last remaining active political cartoonist as far as I'm concerned.

Of course on the previous page is an article about the 'resistance' of the rural to further efforts to stop them chasing foxes and having their dogs rip them to shreds. Such heroes.

Concealed ideology leaks out through 'tone' which a certain type of self-regarding conservative can congratulate themselves for encoding. The placing of this article next to that builds a picture about 'the nutty left' and 'europe' which becomes a mirror. Fuck The Times, I'm down with the newts man.

Other people's newspapers. Farage marching to the hunt with thugs next to speculations on Labour's next leader, by an article on developers 'paying for Newts' with barely-concealed contempt, then 'us' paying to look after the Bayeux Tapestry, they may as well have written 'for the fucking French.'

I have joined the Green party. Reform are the biggest party in terms of members, Labour second, but close by in third is Green. The science of climate change is indisputable and terrifying. If you think it's all lies you've been played. Memberships start as low as £6 a year: join.greenparty.org.uk

When one has reviewed the Coro-Nation Liturgy I trust you will be inspired to carry out your duties as 21st c Christmas tree-burning Englishpersons. I will look to the skies in my waxed Barbour through my RSPB Puffin binoculars and weep the tears of a Briton when I see your smokelambs a-gambolling.

Ahead of the King's Speech from his hice I invite you take in Coro-Nation Liturgy with @mattdalby.bsky.social recorded for the Coro-Nation in 2023. www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGb-...

Christmas in the 1980s.

Here's a thing. drstevehanson.wordpress.com/2025/12/23/t...

Another luxury bungalow on the Moscow real estate market.

Welcome to the new food waste caddy. If this is the closest I will ever get royal faces to rotting vegetables then I'll take it.

My dad's gone. Suddenly. We made a temporary little shrine on the canal side. He was well-liked locally.

ERRATUM special December offer 💥25% off LAST DAYS OF POMPEII💥 via this link -> shop.ingramspark.com/b/084?params... [US/UK customers only]

Erratum Press is giving 25% off the anthology edition of Last Days of Pompeii via this link. Get some vitriol in your stockings this Christmas! shop.ingramspark.com/b/084?params...

Streeting you're a scumbag.

Quite something to be in that list...

The only Black Friday that counts. www.youtube.com/watch?v=neJo...

Very glad I didn't vote Labour. A labour party does not sell out the workers. Clue is in the name.