There’s a certain genius to getting things so wrong when everything is in your favour, so fair play to Celtic’s board.

One of those that’s get better every paragraph, but probably a bit too on the nose www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

Proper double take in the shop as I thought Nintendo had gone all in on everyone’s favourite health insurance assassin

Gabba hammering for the lads, is it?

DCL really needs to have a word with his agent. Why he’s toiling away at the arse end of the Prem instead of jogging around the lower end of Serie A is a travesty.

Be interesting to see where Dyche sticks this in that book he could write about Everton.

Lovely tribute to Robin Smith by England here as the majority look like this the first time they’ve played cricket to leave one lad stranded. Really gets you in the feels.

How have Chelsea made such a mess of an all black kit? Looks like the odds from lost and found:

Fair play to Barry for carrying on after easily dispossessing Dewsbury-Hall

Livid with Wordle. Out for 95.

Minded of the call I took from an old auntie recently, born in Liverpool just after the war, who asked me if I knew how to get the world to sing Imagine on Lennon’s birthday. Reader, I did not.

Actually better that that hit the bar and came out twice as far.

This is an all-timer from the spine of the team. Iroegbunam edging out Tarkowski here.

Managing to make Dan Burn look like Baresi. Stick that on the timeline.

Just the five goes at clearing that before it went straight through the keeper.

Halcyon days for oddballs filming themselves watching football and putting it on the internet.

Missed the news of Everton’s full embrace of the wool pound. To be fair to them, lots of very good people at RL, despite the shenanigans at the top, and it’s an ideal sport for a YouTube age, so nice that Bramley Moore gets to be the platform for it.

I see Prime are once again showing the match while someone hoovers in the back of the commentary box.

Get the chooons blarin’

Could do with getting Grealish on here

That’s never a red card even if he did that to an opponent

Good news for Big Chermiti’s agent as he looks forward to another payday from whomever employs Thelwell next

Your team is 4-1 down with ten mins to go and you’re still in the ground? There’s no helping some people.

Richard Wright walked* so that Cole could run** *fell over a ‘keep away’ sign ** kick a door

Lukewarm take. I quite like that Birmingham stadium. If Everton can build a ship-modelled stadium on the dock, no reason Birmingham shouldn’t lean into Peaky Blinders. Knocks flat pack stadiums out of town every day of the week.

What the hell was that, Scotland?!

That Danish bench jacket is a joy. 🫶

Just drafting my victory speech for when my lottery numbers come in. Strong start, tails off a little.

Big Broja absolutely made of cocktail sticks held together with soggies

This This American Life with a big chunk on Trump’s refugee offer to Afrikaaners is one of those brilliant ones where they don’t take a side, but do the whole thing with a perma-glance to camera. Well worth a listen. podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/t...

Not to speak ill of such things, but was there ever any clarification on how Jota’s car flipped over and burst into flames on an empty highway? Just a very weird episode.

Moyes has to have been able to work out a system by now that doesn’t have either of these two up front.

I mean, maybe that’s what they practice?

Am I too late for the kit fume?

Solid start to this season’s ‘Respectful Mascots’ in Ayr tonight

Hi Lisa Nandy! I’m a BAFTA winner from a small town. Instead of asinine questions like this, why not tell us how we can continue to make a living in the eviscerated creative sector over which you notionally preside?

Reminder that for some reason Charles wanted Andrew brought back into the fold after his mum died. The utter burke.

Mhairi Black doing a stint in a new BBC drama series is very weird. I mean she was so young going into WM that maybe acting was always her thing and accidentally beating Douglas Alexander and ending up and MP is the anomaly, but it still feels weird.

Think I just heard someone say Judi Dench was in Taxi Driver on University Challenge? That would be quite a different movie, can’t say I’m not intrigued.

If you’ve just sent me a DM, can’t read it because you’ve got to do the age verification faff to read a message on here. Not being rude, just lazy.

Barry never really processed the Totally Football crew telling him to ‘watch that tree for danger’ while they all tiptoed off the other way, did he?

Has Beto trademarked the accidental step over in the six-yard box?

Can now add the Lionesses to Everton, Everton Women, Altrincham, and PNE to the teams I’ve taken my kids to watch without seeing a single victory. Top, top Jonah-ing.

Thoughts with Mason, Kuenssburg and Robinson at this difficult time.

New Tinder Bio just dropped

Dyche being referred to as ex-Everton

Has anybody tried to buy tickets for the Lionesses off the FA’s site? If so, how do you open the delivery method window so you can actually buy?

Simply cannot have either of these commentating on either of these, it’s ridiculous.

Quite literally a cap end