I was at a 9am showing of Zootopia 2 today and oh boy are 4-year-olds excited for the new Mario movie.

Based on my memories the drive time between Seattle and Portland has increased by over 90 minutes in the last 20 years.

It's a little late in the night for it but I just picked up the guitar with intent and direction for the first time in many, many months.

Taking a break from editing to listen to Huey Lewis for inspiration.

Phew ChatGPT said I’m not a sociopath.

The bumper music for this Duck game is not jam bands.☹️

🦆

I don't know how they expect me to be productive today with the internet so busy and the Ducks playing tonight.

Can’t figure out if I’m a protoplasm or an ectoplasm guy. Too close to call.

27 pages of space for passport stamps seems excessive for the standard issue.

Scientists act like taking shady money to fund their research isn’t a bribe.

Who's got my heady 12/30 MSG extras?

AG85🔥KA13 #BoltUp

If you’re a sports betting person the Steelers ML is an amazing value bet right now. Signed, a Chargers fan.

We need a dead man’s switch on this 6-7 thing. I’m scared that it will just disappear overnight and nobody will notice.

Fun seeing how 4 of the 5 Chargers O line starters are either the worst or second worst in the league.

They just played Sand as bumper music in the UCLA-Nebraska game and you’ll never know if I’m lying or not because there a 0% chance and of you are watching.

Hell yeah Badgers.

I don’t think the pee-on-a-stick pregnancy test will ever die. The reveal is too dramatic.

The movie "Blank Check" taught me that any house that doesn't have a waterslide in your bedroom isn't your dream house.

Is there anything more resilient to changes in technology than every printer ever?

I can’t believe copper joint braces are still going on strong.

Those Etsy witches sacrificed Dick Cheney today and it fucking worked

I've been asserting my dominance a lot recently. But in very insignificant ways just so I can tell people how much I "assert my dominance."

🥰

Herbert jump slide in for the TD is legendary. ⚡️

If the Jays pull this off I’m ordering some more Canadian jeans tomorrow.

I'm asserting my dominance at work today by being the only one bold enough to wear a costume.

When something ships to you via DHL it's either overnight from China or takes a month to come up I5 from Southern California. Nothing in between.

I don’t know exactly how many otters I follow on TikTok but it’s never too many.

This first set sucks.

God I wish Bill Walton was on this call.

Let’s go 🦆

It’s really weird being in the Big 10.

I’m stoked to see what The Duck has in store for us today. 🦆

Let's just say I have less money now.

Full raw denim Canadian Tuxedo day 22: I can comfortably move my elbows.

Fucking genius there throwing on the Tweezer Reprise right before Woo came in.

Yes, I love them. But when it was pointed out that it's base black for Jerry's usual shirts with a touch of grey. 🤌🤌 🤌Dancing Ducks too? Take my money.

Back in Portland for the weekend and it’s still a Fast And The Furious movie. Not a war zone.

I've been recalled back home to fight in the Great War of Portland this weekend and I can't decide what to wear.

Whenever I see flooding on TV in New Jersey it shocks me how many people have kayaks.

This weekend in sports a pair of my shoes lost the designation of being lucky and passed it on to a jersey for a different team. Circle of life.

Let's get this L with some traditional Chargers wackiness. Or win, both work for me. ⚡️

One of these days I’ll make it to a Marco’s pizza. The persistence of that ad campaign works.

Ever since the Puma rep gave me these ultra-stretchy pants back in like May I've gone as hard as I can in the opposite direction. Things are too stretchy now. I don't trust it.

Day two of being denim jacket guy: "Sorry I'm making everything blue."

Really hoping #ACCAfterDark becomes a thing. Go, Cal?

Hmm why could Trump possibly be kicking up a shitstorm, in Portland or anywhere else. How's the swearing-in going on that new Democratic congresswoman btw?

Sex. 🦆