I’m not sure what it says about me that I am becoming increasingly more attracted to Reece Shearsmith on Taskmaster the angrier he becomes

What in the GCSE Drama #TheBear

Is it me or this week’s taskmaster edited SO fast? It’s a blink per frame

I’ve just gone on Substack and I thought it was just people’s blogs… but it feels like Twitter??? Shall I be on there?? Is it fun? Who uses it? Pls tell me your thoughts

Tried to connect our TV to the Internet and instead found a portal to the past.

I just don’t get it

Disaster: The worst person you know makes v good pun

There’s nothing that makes you feel closer to getting your pension than a sales assistant repeatedly calling you “ma’am”

I just realised six months too late that Monki has shut down! Where can one buy colourful bright oversized clothes now 😓

you cannot leave facebook when people are genuinely posting things like this

Watching Olivia Rodrigo at Glastonbury as if I didn’t watch her live only two days ago

Black Sheep Coffee will do red bull infusions but won’t offer a single sugar free syrup to help diabetics

It’s so hot this evening i am going to have to sleep topless. And I’m currently breastfeeding and an oversupplier. This is gon be bad

When I liked this weather: for a 90 minute period after I came out of an air conditioned restaurant When I disliked this weather: all other times

** AUTUMN/WINTER 2025 / SPRING/SUMMER 2026 BOOK EVENTS ** ARE YOU A PUBLICIST / AUTHOR / BOOKSELLER - WANNA DO SOME BOOKISH PROMO FOR OUR BOOK? #debut authors - let's united and PROMISE NOT TO BE SH#T x

Parenting be like Under three hours sleep: I can’t cope, I can’t do this. I’m so tired. Everything hurts. Over three hours sleep: life is good??? I am fine??? The world is amazing

Just tried on swimming costumes two months postpartum and then stepped barefoot in cat poo how’s your morning going 😭

The only thing more embarrassing than being a LinkedInfluencer is being an unsuccessful one 😩

Still not convinced by Bluesky tbh. Twitter when it was still Twitter was FUN. Where does one go for text-based fun and memes

Duolingo’s customer base must be aggressively Gen Z because this is such an ick

Has anyone ever actually eaten one of these?

Nature is healing. 2010 office wear for the club has returned 🙏🏼

This also contains one of the most bluesky comment threads of all time from this misunderstood genius

Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days

I always have to psych myself up to listen to voice messages and I don’t know why. Doesn’t matter who it’s from or what it’s about

Deliveroo, how am I supposed to take a photo of missing items?! The whole point is that they are missing?!

If you see this drop a blue character

The biggest problem with Bluesky (and why I don’t use it as often as old Twitter) is the lack of feralness and whimsy. Everyone who crops up on my timeline is just nice and sincere.

My Trading 212 account is all in the red negatives, but weirdly my biggest failing stock at the moment is Greggs

Cartoon of a penguin in the style of Helen Lovejoy that says “Won’t somebody please think of the tarrifs?”

I’m not saying I’m hormonal but I also did almost cry at seeing an old man consulting his laminated bus timetable

Post your favourite Doctor Who. Wrong answers only.

Pre-ordered Sunrise on the Reaping on the 26 October and it’s arriving Friday. But it was released today!!! What’s the point of preordering then?!

You know you need to relax more when even your mum is telling you to chill out and play video games

I know this is boomer energy and for safety reasons… but it would be nice if they made cinemas darker again

Surely there was a better pun than “shakes-feet”

Every year I bet £10 on the Oscars. This year I did quite badly. I won all the standard ones - best returns were Anora best pic (1/2 odds) and Mikey Madison (21/10 odds) but I clunked it on Best Original Screenplay 😟

Why I became a freelancer

I know everyone raves about Renée Zellwegger’s accent in Bridget Jones’ Diary but there are definitely some words she says SO weirdly. And the word “Parent” came up frequently in Mad About The Boy

Was it me or was tonight’s Apprentice episode really weirdly edited? I’m also 95% sure Sir Alan wasn’t in the same room at the same time as the candidates in the Covent Garden warehouse

Trying to log into a gmail account on a new phone is so annoying. It keeps telling me to open the Google mail app to verify myself… when I’m already on the app!

Delighted to announce that after buying four chopping boards I will now be filing for bankruptcy

Turns out the worst-behaved people at the cinema is actually men over 75

Has anyone written about how influencers get a tonne of engagement when pregnant and then it all falls off a cliff once baby is born?

Made a rug yesterday!

Genuinely tallying the amount of times I want to get a last minute coffee for the train and can’t because Black Sheep Coffee refuses to supply sugar-free syrups ☹️

Freelancing means the joy that I can take the day off to go to a rug making workshop. But also means I have existential dread all day at the work I haven’t done.

I genuinely can’t relate to people who say they can’t take too much time off of work as they get bored. Grow up