Black ⚫ or white ⚪

The holiday plane meme but it's me and boats in Portugal. The same people doing the same as me even though I'm doing different things 🫠

Time the sun the cheeks 😮‍💨

Time the sun the cheeks 😮‍💨

I had a serious bike accident in Minneapolis last month and was in the HCMC ICU for several days after needing emergency brain surgery. We put together a GFM; I'm looking for some help with the mounting costs as I recover. Anything you can spare will help <3 gofund.me/97b67235a

UK politics is now entering the "you don't have a mandate" phase which will continue until a GE is called 🫠

Had a very gorgeous day on the beach 🥹

Has my mum been talking to the algorithm

No one talks about how hard it is to apply suncream when you're hairy

You do have to enjoy the pettiness of Starmer not allowing his potential replacements a proper summer break

Prime ministers always quit when I'm on holiday 👀

This country is fucking mad

Achilles hasn't been eating his prescription wet food so I told the cat sitter this and to just put it out anyway. He only went and ate it immediately for her 😤😤

*airbus dog noises* 🐶 ✈️

Remember when I tried to contact my dad to wish him happy birthday a few years ago but I couldn't because he'd changed his number and not given it to me LOL. Happy father's day 🙃

Husband hunting in the lounge and it isn't going well 😤

The guilt tripping 😭😭

Flying from LGW which is rare for me so obviously anxiety is in overdrive as it's not "familiar". Love being so mentally unstable 😅

The conveyor belt of big boys making their turn into the LHR landing queue was right over my flat this morning and it was really noisy 🫠

Actually a bit stressed (so unlike me) about the temp next week and not being home to keep an eye on Achilles. The cat sitter is coming twice a day but obviously she won't be able to open the windows during the night to help ventilate etc. 🫠🫠

Spent the day with some hot men and everything is good 😮‍💨

Me: my lip hurts I'm worried I'm getting a cold sore. Mum: what have you done to it? Me: I think someone bit it Mum: why are all my sons sluts? 🫠🫠🫠

I love A Place in the Sun where it's like "Janice and Ian who have never been to Valencia before want to buy their forever home there with a budget of £2.50"

Spent the day with some hot men and everything is good 😮‍💨

Excuse me we already have Wii Fit and look how that worked for the millennials 🫠

Another fantastic night @ GBTQ+ men rope event organised by @knaughtyotter.bsky.social @anatomiestudio.bsky.social & thank you @philfyalt.bsky.social sharing it with you🪢❤️‍🔥🙏🏼

One thing I need to work on though is how the presence of other gay men with conventionally attractive and lean bodies sends me into a complete spiral. Girl who needs to get some self worth 🫠

Got tied up and suspended this evening and honestly what a perfect start to my week off

TFIF Girlies 😮‍💨

Not me answering the door to the police whilst in football shorts (commando) and a crop top 🫠

I was just walking along the road and this man on a bike was riding slowly past me with his tongue out licking his lips staring at me. What the hell 😭😭

Ange just letting the lads have their cock fights whilst she waits patiently in the shadows.

TFIF Girlies 😮‍💨

Stinky 🐷

Me doing gay maths to try and convince myself upgrading my flight is worth it

Stinky 🐷

Worried I'm coming down with something because my pits are STRONG even for me 😵‍💫

Someone is trying to set up an account with the General Register Office using a version of my email account 😭😭 how do people get their own email addresses wrong!??

Had a very odd dream that I had to walk across the tracks to get my overground train at crystal palace as that service doesn't stop on an actual platform and I also had a hummingbird chick in my bag

At least my ass is fat 🫠 #humpday

Joined Feeld but like I don't get it? You can't see who has liked you so what's the point?

At least my ass is fat 🫠 #humpday

BBC interviewing England fans who have travelled to the USA and I'm just wondering why those children are not in school???

Ugh I'm feeling so deflated fitness-wise. I've been pretty consistent recently and yet weight isn't budging, belly is bigger than ever, love handles for the gods. My diet is pretty ok. I don't understand 😭😭😭

Very stressed as I've not seen the cygnets for a few days. No swans whatsoever on Sunday or yesterday but today I saw one adult swan but on the adjacent pond. Like where could they have gone? They can't fly yet!

Yes it's piss xx

Yes it's piss xx

My colleague said I looked handsome today

He was not impressed with the vet visit 😭

A pigeon flew into a window on my block and killed itself and some gulls are circling but every time they get close, Achilles jumps onto the window sill and scares them away 😭😭