Trying to negotiate with your winter breed dog that doesn't get out of bed before 9 on weekdays that we have to leave the house before seven to walk because it's going to be 96 out today (35 Celsius) is a test in patience that I don't have.

Terrible picture but first baby deer sighting!!!!! It was so teeny tiny 😭😭😭

Y'all why am I so fucking awkward. I'm a whole adult. I'm closer to 40 than not. How is it that I cannot navigate being a human person yet 😭😭😭

He's bringing my license home!!! 😭 we're saved

This is cute if you need some silly for your day archiveofourown.org/works/642679...

I have an appointment at a new office at two but my license is in Mr Beckels car and he doesn't have his phone with him and am I still sleeping because this is literally a nightmare 😭😭😭😭

Here's some shit everyone needs to be aware of! Check out my reblog below for information on how to fight this shit. We have until May 22nd. It only takes a few minutes to tell the FCC why this is so incredibly wrong. #lgbtq #transphobia #QueerRights #TransRights www.tumblr.com/intheimpalaw...

Update they are in the ground waiting to be eaten by the squirrels, probably. Also here's a huge rock we dug up.

When I have to plant the plants I bought and I didn't get the ground ready beforehand

Kindle unlimited reminds me that I too could publish a book because what I just read was somehow very enjoyable and the worst thing I've ever read. 5/5 stars would not recommend 😂

Maddox Monroe or Maddox Caldwell everyone vote right now 🫵🤨

Anybody got a mafia type slow burn romance with a reasonable plot and decent writing? Throw it to me I'm desperate 😭

Me: I'm not super invested in this book. *Reads this bit* Me: okay maybe I'm still interested.

Got a new very fancy whipped tallow lotion today from the farm. It makes me feel moisturized by moonlight. It also, apparently, tastes amazing according to Khione who will not stop fucking licking it off me 😭 😂

Rival crime bosses you will forever be in my mind

Hey you moms I fan out with. Happy mother's day 😘

Behold! The best thing I've ever found at a street market. Everyone meet my beautiful son

I got my 5k time despite not sleeping 🎉🎉🎉 thank you Amanda the jelly bean Queen who gave me some beans mid race. You are my champion jelly bean stranger.

I worried about my knee and my tummy ache but I should have worried about not fucking sleeping 😡😡😡 😭 this is the me the day gets I guess

What do you mean my belly hurts and my knees sore before my 5k tomorrow. What do you mean 😭

😭😭😭 💜💜💜 😭😭😭

Tim Minear if you’re out there listening - we do not need some 4 part crazy opening disaster for season 10. #911onabc

Not the diaz parent redemption arc continuation I swear to f-ing god

WE WERE ROBBED OF EDDIE VISION 😭

"yeah how about this crash cart bitch" Harry, probably

Omg it's gonna come back with a vision for Eddie isn't it? Cmon commercial break

NOT STUCK IN THE ELEVATOR 😭

Me: Kill him mafia twink (thank you @lunarpenumbra.bsky.social ) Mr Beckels: his father's dead, now he's the mafia twunk Sir that's not how that works at all 😂

"I look like a drawing of a hobbit from the 80s with a mustache" You're not wrong my guy 😂

"have you ever been checked for whatever it is you seem to have?" Bob's burgers I love you

Tequila in a teacup? Don't mind if I do 🙂‍↕️

Why does it look like she has a buck tooth 😭😂

We left the sliding door open while we went on our hike this morning so it's a good thing we live in the woods

I'm excited to watch the finale live next week with everybody 😂

Me: apparently Eddie's getting shot again Mr Beckels: at least he's not getting kidnapped Istg

Guys was it a truck????

This has been the best evening of only watching the show through everyone's reaction threads 😂

And I saw a sign in the sky above Dr Octoberfest the Greg, a hope of gay Eddie from the heavens

Writing in a coffee shop better give me some words 🫵☕

After he scheduled his car and hotel room and after I packed his bag to drive it to him so he wouldn't have to come all the way home just to turn around the trip was cancelled

Me: *is inspired to do a mid week date night. Goes to wegs, gets dinner, gets dessert, gets wine, gets flowers* Mr Beckels: Hey I have to go to Maryland tonight YOU KNOW WHAT UNIVERSE I GET IT BO ROMANCE YOU BITCH

My favorite part about Dashboard is it's an equal opportunity destroyer. Rated e for everyone. No matter who you are it will hurt you. Eldest daughter 💥🔫 younger sibling 💥🔫 adult still mourning the parents your parents should have been 💥🔫

Should I cut my own bangs? (Y'all better tell me no)

Day started off with a tick crawling around the shell of my ear so day straight into a fire dumpster!!!! Can't even go back to bed about it because it's the scene of the crime ahhhhhhhhhh

Put my pancakes in the microwave and the plate cracked. Um what?

Okay here's the haul. I spent literally all of my tattoo money 😂 😭 Also got free bookmarks made of Mr Beckels and won a free magnetic bookmark in a prize drawing! Solid indie bookstore day. And I'm set on books until Christmas 😆

After 11 hours and 8 stores my eyes are fried. I read so many words today 😂😭

Happy indie bookstore day! Support your local independent bookstores. I'm armed with caffeine, what's left of my birthday cash, and big tote bag. Any book recs I should keep my eyes peeled for 👀?

Happy Miss Congeniality Day to all who celebrate!

She's trying to emotionally manipulate me into giving her more food and I will not