Chris Mason is roughly what would have happened if Peter Drury had pursued political journalism instead of football commentary.

I would have liked it if one of them at the dinner table had just said: 'I want to go to Ibiza with the lads and just get on it, to be fair.' #TheTraitors

Pfannenstiel saw this when doing his research into Aberdeen and thought, 'Right, lads, a clear red line: understood.'

Saying that about 'identity', the real challenge for the next four games is putting points on the board: Norwich (H), Derby (A), Pompey (A), Stoke (H). Far from easy, but a decent run of results can buy some breathing space and give Ramsay more scope to experiment with things later in the season.

Weird one. Clearer identity in first half, but that approach means conceding first is going to require a quite fundamental shift. Really messy on the ball. Didn't lay a glove until 2-1. Some positive in-game changes, but also thought dial moved too far to begin with. Winning goal far too easy. #WBA

Well, #WBA going to have to come out and play now. Increasingly felt like Boro were chaining attacks and we couldn't get anything going on the turnover. It's certainly a bold way to approach your home games, even against the better sides in the league. An early test of Ramsay's adaptability.

I'm not advocating for an increase to the licence fee, but I always think the Pointless jackpot is a bit of a pisstake given the amount of work you typically have to put in to win it - and that it has to be split between two people.

Robert Jenrick speaks like an actor playing a caricature of a fictional right-wing politician on a second-rate ITV drama.

Stephen Robinson reminding us why he would be such an unsuitable Aberdeen manager. Totally one-dimensional and incapable of being a protagonist. Hearts have been down to ten men since the 15th minute, when it was 0-0!

Increasingly convinced that this guy is advising the Faithfuls behind the scenes. #TheTraitors

"I've gone for yourself, [Name]." "I'm afraid I'm voting for yourself, [Name]." Please someone end this madness before the next series! #TheTraitors

"I have been trained by a former FBI agent on the beauty of microexpressions and people's ability to lie." #TheTraitors

Gone at Roxy inserting herself as the Speaker of the Breakfast Table. A true disciple of Betty Boothroyd. #TheTraitors

"I'm actually a published author of several psychological thrillers." #TheTraitors

Matthew. #TheTraitors

"Good evening, Chris. I'm here at the London Stadium for this Europa Conference League group stage match between West Ham and Maccabi Tel Aviv."

A bit sad really that Gervais has gone from being partly responsible for one the greatest, sharpest sitcoms ever produced, to exclusively churning out rage-bait slop for morons.

I raise you Damien Delaney

this, from West Ham's Freddie Potts, is the single worst "five famous people you'd invite to dinner" I've ever seen

Tag yourself. I'm Kyle Mercer.

It is insulting, wrong and downright shameful to suggest that I am only still watching Industry because of Marisa Abela.

Well deserved. He was great. But I did find the reaction to Adolescence a bit odd, especially the demand to show it in schools. It is a technically excellent depiction of something, but does not actually advance an argument for or against anything that would cut through with that demographic.

*Walks into public toilet.* "This place stinks of piss!"

Delighted to announce that I have been appointed as Head of Water Supply at South East Water. I would like to place on record my thanks to Brooklyn Beckham for the opportunity to serve as his legal adviser, and also to Shay Given for the session that I conducted last week as his history tutor.

Thank you, “WBA Shop”. But, in the future, just stick to the scarves and gloves. You have massively overstepped your remit here.

I bet not a single Aberdeen player will have pulled him up about this. Milne is right behind him and literally looks the other way. Raskin could walk into our dressing room, spray water over each of our players, and they would just go along with it. A squad of losers, nice guys and bully victims.

Darren Fletcher wearing a shirt and tie is a bit jarring. Interim managers shouldn't do that, let alone pre-interims. Tracksuit, club shop. No exceptions.

It is not a good reflection on Scottish football - or arguably Scotland - that thousands of fans can belt out the full-fat version of Billy Boys at a game and nobody even bothers to say anything about it anymore. Very normal, very healthy.

What Ryan Mason, for his many shortcomings, wouldn’t have given for a bit of variance.

"Iran appears to be unusually full of Gryffindors."

Sublime #footybantz, as always, on the BBC Sport MBM. Thank you, Charlie.

The BBC giving Jason Mohammad, Rob Green and Dion Dublin the FA Cup highlights show - in the prime MOTD slot, no less - does feel very apt, because it is pretty much the equivalent of a Premier League side giving the fringe players a rare start against lower league opposition.

I have challenged myself in 2026, after an underwhelming 2025, to find fewer excuses for not reading, and more excuses to read. This has made for a very compelling and engaging start to that resolution.

An enjoyable malapropism from Micah Richards there, speaking about Spurs in the second half: "The impotence was with them." It kind of works, in a way.

On this: I still suspect Thomas Frank is a good coach, but he is only able to perform well within a properly functioning club. In all honesty, I would put Unai Emery in that bracket too. I think if you moved Emery to a Spurs or Man United right now, he would suddenly look much worse.

[Insert joke here about how the biggest shock in FA Cup history would actually be your team winning a game they could be reasonably expected to win.]

Next week on #TheTraitors: The Library Five v The Gang of Four.

Me on literally any Teams call that takes place before about 11am. #TheTraitors

The penny has finally dropped: James on #TheTraitors is Foz from Peep Show. Uncanny.

EXCLUSIVE: Leaked WhatsApp messages show Labour MPs urging govt to leave X, arguing that it should "show direction to others in the UK" The MPs said X owner Elon Musk is "fascist" and that the platform's AI tool, Grok, had put "children in harm's way"

Has Gabriel Martinelli been arrested yet?

Right, can somebody intervene before the next series of #TheTraitors and tell them to stop the "I'm voting for yourself, [Name]" thing? Doing my tits in.

Interesting from Ramsay, in that I suspect #WBA have some of the tools to be an effective transitional team. I thought Mason got stuck between that and being more possession-based, and never quite settled. I also wonder if this squad, with the exception of Johnston, would be more suited to a 3-5-2.

Man's not done.

There is hiring in your own image, then there is Andrew Nestor hiring Eric Ramsay.

Looks like Eric Ramsay for #WBA, then. I can't say I know much about him, but seems something of a double down on the logic that might have underpinned Ryan Mason's appointment. You usually expect managerial appointments after a sacking to be a reaction to the perceived failings of the previous one.

Just a bit of snow at my mum’s place in Aberdeen.

There's good news and bad news. The bad news is Terry Yorath has died. I know, gutting. On a more positive note, the good news is... I am responsible for Gabby Logan's presenting career. I didn't even know her before that. So, every cloud. You're still thinking about the bad news, aren't you?

Just got my 2025 purchase review through from Sainsbury’s. Turns out I was the #1 buyer of XL condoms UK-wide. Bit embarrassing!

There is probably a question about when this becomes a genuine issue for Sky. I would have put Everton v Wolves on Tennis and Brentford v Sunderland on F1, but each to their own.