Kinda sorta at the point of giving up.

Depluralize a movie: ME

Making a big pot of spicy pinto beans from scratch. Wore gloves to chop up onions and jalapeños. Got everything in the pot and simmering. Cleaned up the workspace--once again, wearing gloves. Sat down to let it cook and my eyes suddenly started burning and watering like I'd dug my fingers in them.

Teenjus (2025) Dir.: Uncle Baby Billy

Michael Moriarty was born April 5, 1941

I discovered last week just how hot it can get in the workroom in my library (I supervise the shelving team) when it's warm outside. We can't wear shorts, so I'm thinking I might be on the way to becoming a kilt guy.

If Matt Shaw gets on a hot streak for fifteen or twenty games like he did last year, the Cubs better trade him while his value is high.

He is risen.

Have to apply a prescription steroid cream and Vaseline to the spots on my hand twice a day, so I just live my life wearing a surgical glove for the foreseeable future.

ICYMI: I wrote about my favorite "theatrical/stunt troupe travels the countryside performing shows based on Arthurian legend while riding motorcycles" movie for @neonsplatter.bsky.social.

Reminder for anyone who needs to hear this: The kid's room at your public library is not a substitute for daycare. You can't just drop off little kids and expect the librarians and staff to watch them for you.

Remember when this little goof-off piece was penned by the Coen's supposed editor "Roderick Jaynes" as an odd piece of promotion for THE MAN WHO WASN'T THERE? The silliness being that there was no Roderick Jaynes. He was a pseudonym used by the Coen Brothers when they edited their own films.

I gave this one a lot of thought. I really considered New Haven, CT and Nashville, but nowhere has ever surpassed St. Louis for me. Terrible weather, smells like raw sewage from the Mississippi, dirty, and not a goddamn thing to do.

He is risen.

Never seen it. Framed #1486 🎥 🟥 🟥 🟥 🟥 🟥 🟩 framed.wtf

Vulture Cinematrix No. 740: Apr 5, 2026 I got 9/9 Correct Score: 2653 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Play at: vulture.com/vulturecinem...

I gave this one a lot of thought. I really considered New Haven, CT and Nashville, but nowhere has ever surpassed St. Louis for me. Terrible weather, smells like raw sewage from the Mississippi, dirty, and not a goddamn thing to do.

Framed #1485 🎥 🟥 🟩 ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ framed.wtf

Vulture Cinematrix No. 739: Apr 4, 2026 I got 9/9 Correct Score: 2687 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Play at: vulture.com/vulturecinem...

Remember when this little goof-off piece was penned by the Coen's supposed editor "Roderick Jaynes" as an odd piece of promotion for THE MAN WHO WASN'T THERE? The silliness being that there was no Roderick Jaynes. He was a pseudonym used by the Coen Brothers when they edited their own films.

Why is everyone acting like a certain major news story is imminent? Did I miss something?

Reminder for anyone who needs to hear this: The kid's room at your public library is not a substitute for daycare. You can't just drop off little kids and expect the librarians and staff to watch them for you.

Sir, a second bird is at the feeder

Has some humorless killjoy popped up yet to explain why cake is bad for a horse's health?

ICYMI: I wrote about my favorite "theatrical/stunt troupe travels the countryside performing shows based on Arthurian legend while riding motorcycles" movie for @neonsplatter.bsky.social.

The unstoppable Finnish badass in SISU: ROAD TO REVENGE kills approximately a hundred Russians in increasingly brutal and baroque ways, yet no one ever refers to him as "Baba Yaga." Have the JOHN WICK movies been lying to me this whole time?

Seven shows to get to know me: The Venture Bros. The X-Files Deadwood Warrior Twin Peaks Justified The Wire

Seven shows to get to know me: The Venture Bros. The X-Files Deadwood Warrior Twin Peaks Justified The Wire

Anyway, it's a fun movie. Pretty much on par on with the first one.

The unstoppable Finnish badass in SISU: ROAD TO REVENGE kills approximately a hundred Russians in increasingly brutal and baroque ways, yet no one ever refers to him as "Baba Yaga." Have the JOHN WICK movies been lying to me this whole time?

Framed #1484 🎥 🟥 🟥 🟥 🟩 ⬛ ⬛ framed.wtf

Vulture Cinematrix No. 738: Apr 3, 2026 I got 9/9 Correct Score: 2643 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Play at: vulture.com/vulturecinem...

As my mom got into her 60’s, before the Parkinson’s and dementia set in, she opened up about how hard it was for her, my dad, and my sisters when they moved to rural Missouri. They were largely ostracized because she was Catholic. The local Baptists and Methodists were openly hostile.

Irish and Italians are about this 🤏🏾close to not being white anymore

Motherfucker thinks he’s Henry VIII.

Today in “your body turns against you when you hit a certain age,” I was diagnosed with eczema. As far as these things go, it’s not anywhere on the level of being told I had cancer. Still, it’s annoying and itchy and unsightly.

Framed #1483 🎥 🟥 🟥 🟩 ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ framed.wtf

Vulture Cinematrix No. 737: Apr 2, 2026 I got 9/9 Correct Score: 2685 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Play at: vulture.com/vulturecinem...

Trailer Trash: HIGH-BALLIN’ (1978) Preview for the Canadian trucker action film starring Jerry Reed and Peter Fonda. www.neonsplatter.com/trailer-tras...

Were there really only 46 episodes of BJ and The Bear? It felt like that show ran for like eight seasons.

"Rain's a-comin', Chicago! Conserve water to help MWRD manage the load. Delay showers, flush less, and hold off on laundry. Let's keep our city dry and flowing smoothly! "

Time for a little positivity. I actually wrote something new. Check out my piece on Romero's KNIGHTRIDERS for @neonsplatter.bsky.social. I always appreciate it when @neuroticmonkey.bsky.social invites me to contribute something to his cool site.

Framed #1482 🎥 🟩 ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ framed.wtf

Seven at one percent and two at two percent. Vulture Cinematrix No. 736: Apr 1, 2026 I got 9/9 Correct Score: 2696 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Play at: vulture.com/vulturecinem...

Damn, I didn’t know these books went so dark.

When I'm on the train or the bus, I bare my teeth at babies/toddlers when their parents aren't looking. It activates the dormant instinct in the kid to be fearful/distrustful of strangers, even if they're not aware that is the thought they're having. It's my little public service to keep them safe.

It's been SUPER hard not to talk about this for the past year, but it's finally here! Massive thanks to Bleeding Skull for letting me be part of this release, both on a commentary track with Mr. Berry and with my 2019 re-score of the film. I have also released the score on Bandcamp, link in thread!

Time for a little positivity. I actually wrote something new. Check out my piece on Romero's KNIGHTRIDERS for @neonsplatter.bsky.social. I always appreciate it when @neuroticmonkey.bsky.social invites me to contribute something to his cool site.

Added To Watchlist: KNIGHTRIDERS (1981) @thewedgeserpent.bsky.social on how George A. Romero’s most personal film is also a terrifically entertaining and unique experience, too. www.neonsplatter.com/added-to-wat...

I wrote this about APRIL FOOL'S DAY almost 13 years ago. My rage against the film has dissipated a little bit, but I still hate it.