The NHL’s AI chatbot doesn’t know what the NHL is.

TIL that calcium deposits can hold corroded galvanized pipes together—for a time.

Third grade sports trash talk is undefeated: “Ooooh, sit down, ya big little!”

Who amongst us hasn’t muttered “My life is in shambles” while running late for work and eating an adult Lunchable in the car at 2 p.m.?

Is it good when the structural engineer for your construction project keeps sighing and measuring things?

This is the week I’ve scheduled everything that needs to be done before the end of the year. I must learn to embrace the morning meeting.

The days are short and dark; please enjoy some dogs in snoods.

I need hosiery, so I was trying to search for brands that might fit my body type. And, well, there is no phrase containing “curvy” and “pantyhose” that doesn’t primarily bring up fetish content on Al Gore’s internet.

I must apologize for J.L. Bach erasure.

Went out to MoCo to put the 13 year-old car through the wash. Ended up queuing between a BMW i7 and a Bugatti. At least the staff is likely to be careful here.

I worked out, so I’m having a small treat about it, partially defeating the purpose of working out.

Trying to sell @benharris1.bsky.social on climbing Cotopaxi. Surprisingly, “It’s below the death zone!” was not persuasive.

Mr. Llama won a county-wide photo contest in my father’s mountain community.

Email from Dad starter pack

Made an incredible white chicken chili with fresh jalapeño, Chimayó chile salt, canned Hatch chiles, and cayenne with pickled jalapeños on top. 🤤

In the last three years, I’ve spent 112 days in four different short-term rental properties. I am now radicalized about shitty can openers and dull knives.

I’m ordering bathroom fixtures, and the pricing is bewildering. Sure, go ahead and price out the tub and bath drain separately and to the tenth of a cent. No, no need for the toilet tank; just the bowl for me today.

DDOT continues to publish before/after analyses of safety projects. The numbers for the 9th street NW bike lanes suggest that we should be doing these projects everywhere we can. Crashes plummeted, pedestrian and bike traffic skyrocketed, and vehicle travel times dropped.

W.F., the secret third Bach.

You know you’re a scarred homeowner when your daytime nap dreams feature catastrophic water leaks.

A haunted doll might make better choices for me.

Last night my niece started waving my (empty) wine glass around while declaring “I’m Aunt Llama.” Am I the drunkle?

I have formed a posse with my five-year-old niece, the dog, and the cat. I am too powerful for this Thanksgiving dinner.

I have reached the half-way point of the Thanksgiving drive, the point where Sheetz vanilla coffee nonsense tastes good to me, a non-coffee drinker, and the point where I no longer believe reaching my destination to be an achievable goal.

Attempted a similar strategy today. Willed both MD drivers and all of OH not to exist, but it didn’t work out for me.

She didn’t like me at first, but now this cutey accepts scritches when I see her on Tuesdays.

Whomst among us hasn't felt a little vacuum about snackie all done

We make fun of Maryland drivers, but it’s art the way they turn the right lane of the freeway into a passing lane, have the courage not to yield when making a right on red, and force signals to change by entering intersections against the light.

I was not into the pumpkin madness of October Trader Joe’s. But egg nog yogurt and stuffing popcorn are November heroes.

I have to drive to both Baltimore and Alexandria today, so I’m going to lie under a fleece blanket about it for a little while.

For the last three days I have awakened between 3 and 5 a.m. with a screaming migraine. I can’t seem to find the unsubscribe button.

I have a half dozen pears ripening on the counter, which means that I will either never get to eat a fully ripened pear, or I will have a very brief window later today in which to consume all six of them.

When the mobile lounges are self-destructing, it’s an indication that we need to move past this technology already.

I still get free tequila shots at the Salvadoran Tex-Mex restaurant where I worked 29 years ago. And it was good to meet my dad out and cheer him up while his wife is in the hospital.

I have completed one (1) business call so far today, and now I need a little treat about it.

Look at this beautiful boy!

I was reading an organization’s description and came across the following: “this includes events specifically welcoming: women and gender-expansive individuals, people of color, and conservatives.”

How had I waited 45 years to go to Rodman’s? It has the most wonderful things all weirdly grouped under one roof—fresh tamarind, lingonberry preserves, European chocolates, watch repair, party supplies, luggage and original Vitabath.

This man is a local legend and an entire delight.

We strengthened, we lengthened, and we stayed married.

For the first time I personally witnessed a fed threatening arrest of a DC citizen for the crime of running his mouth about federal law enforcement in DC. Feels bad, man.

I’ve had radiator heat for the past 10 winters, and I’m now in temporary housing with forced-air heat. How do people live like this? You spend half your year as a dried out husk that merely resembles a human.

I like how full text search of every book and human thought ever was a SOLVED PROBLEM in 2001, and now dicks at search engines and my own phone – a piece of silicon faster to respond than God was ever imagined in scripture – prevent it from working, _as a retroactive infantilizing design choice_.

Very hard to dress for both 40° and 76° while wearing work-appropriate attire. I can do this on a desert hiking trail, no problem. But I tend to look pretty feral in that setting.

I don’t believe in hell. I also believe that every woman who refuses to protect teenage girls should burn in hell.

Dogs on video calls are the best thing ever. I will gladly participate in a parent-teacher conference or a construction status call if you just let me see a cute dog.

I asked for a daytime-appropriate black dress, knee-length or longer to wear to a December funeral. I mentioned that I’m going for a classic look, like Donna Karan, Black Halo, Ralph Lauren. It was a Nordstrom styling service, so I deliberately chose brands they carry.

I have a personal styling appointment right now, and it’s going hilariously badly. If I am brave, I will post photos later.

When women reach a life stage of not wanting to put up with bullshit, it’s a problem for conservative men? Interesting.

After a 21-year relationship, my husband and I have decided to take our relationship to the next step. Yes, we’re taking a Pilates class together 😬.