Can I afford Chinese food for lunch? Do I even deserve Chinese food for lunch??

dawg I am genuinely so tired. every time I ask "can I do anything for you/bring you anything" the answer is always. ALWAYS. "five million dollars, cash." It wasn't really funny the first time and it isn't funny after a hundred times.

Bf doesn't know it yet but as of last night I've adopted a new rule: anytime he talks to me in a way I don't enjoy, I will henceforth deploy my family's old tactic of "removing myself from the situation" & combine it with my new meta of "going out to buy weed he would disapprove of me smoking"

since my bf came to bed tonight I have been waking up every hour bc he is just ripping ass constantly. This man is farting with a frequency I would describe as medically mysterious. The bedroom smells like bean gas. It's 2:42 & I guess I am just awake now bc I cant stand to be in there anymore

This channel has become one of my favorites. The creator always crafts this cool unspoken narrative. Like in this one feels like waking up in the middle of the night to hear infomercial music, but as the mix progresses there's this bleak analog horror vibe that creeps in. 10/10 soothes my brain

And now I'm just awkwardly standing right outside the base checkin and people in cars are staring at me because someone forgot his medication in his office on base and it would take longer to check my Missouri ID and get me a visitor pass, this day is getting better and better lmao

"I can't find my black backpack." "Oh I've seen a black backpack. Here!" "No that's the camelback." "Okay... I've found another black backpack. Is this it?" "No I have a bunch of black backpacks, that's not the right one." I am calm I am rational I am breathing

This morning we are self-soothing with nostalgia for a world that only existed on my TV

Lowkey a mule may be my new favourite simple cocktail, this shit slaps

Thank God for Ron's because I cannot find a store in Dayton that will sell me a frozen pineapple pizza and I have had unholy cravings

There is something tremendously indulgent and naughty about having a bloody mary with breakfast

The work lot geese are back

Holy shit I'm proud of this one

My great struggle right now is that I can't tell anybody the name of my favorite mix right now without sounding insane Yall gotta trust me though this one fucks with legs, we are talking peak shit to go to the stratosphere to

Sat down on the edge of the bed to get ready to sleep and the screws holding the frame together on the bottom had stripped cause the one side snapped and fell and anyway that's how I had an absolute meltdown because I was fully expecting to be screamed at like I'd broken it on purpose thanks dad

Tuna bowl because I can't stop eating like a catholic wtf

Hawnk

Yeah, im grubbin

dinner tonight appears to be some kind of concept of "cowboy beans" based entirely off of one 30 second clip from some old western movie the boyfriend saw one time. while i am down to try new things i'm mostly stressed out bc this man isn't NECESSARILY what i would call a "trustworthy" chef

I am now the woman who hits up the $5 cheese bin religiously every time I visit Kroger, here is today's find

Internet wasn't working so I spent hours trying to solve the problem. I finally gave up and messaged Joe to tell him I suck and he will have to fix it when he gets home unless I magically become smarter than I am and apparently crashing out & berating myself was the secret sauce because now it works

Did you know that you can go on wol.gg and see just how much of a no life little freakazoid you are? I have spent 303,571 minutes or 5,060 hours or 211 goddamn days since 2018 on this cursed game and I still can't quit

Am i insane if I try to sneak to Kroger and back for a second, secret grocery run in which I actually get to pick up all the shit I didn't get to earlier (including ice cream)

Everything about this day should not be frustrating me the way it is and I am aware this is such a whiny little nothing to bitch about but I said I wanted ice cream not goddamn italian ice

We are getting groceries today but first my boyfriend had to stop us by Fairborn so and I am watching him hand over cash for a plastic bag full of Warhammer minis and I feel like I am watching a drug deal take place

She is beautiful

Bushido Ramen

Dawg I would kill for some noodles rn

There are several stray cats living behind my new office and the techs have named them all and are currently in deep discussion about how easy they think each one will be to catch for TNR and it's sending me. "Well Baby already wants to come over but Big Keith is another matter.."

@sisterdino.bsky.social lmao you were right the espresso martini is DANGEROUSLY good

I would like to posit that Cutwater cocktails function similarly to edibles, in that I had my first can, said "this ain't shit," and slammed a second. Now I feel it beginning to hit me. I fear what may happen to my faculties once I stand up as I've been seated since I started in on the second can.

Y'all these chickpeas fuck so hard i cannot begin to express to you how good this little bowl was

Broke my toe earlier and it hurts like bitch

Waxxpot did me up NICE, my eyebrows look immaculate god bless Danielle

The vibes at Star City are immaculate, there are two little tables of tipsy old people playing euchre behind me and ALL SHE WANTS TO DO IS DANCE

Oh my god it's beautiful

And here's the yapper

Thinking about how little food in Cape is actually good made me miss Burritoville so I made dirty fries for dinner

Cape Girardeau was truly a hellhole, I jusy had lunch at a food court in a half-dead mall here in Dayton and it was better than like 90%of the food back home

I hate adhd so much I can't even enjoy playing league bc Joe is at the desk next to me listening to some thrice cursed twitch streamer playing resident evil and even with my headset blasting my music and the game sounds I'm STILL distracted by the shooting and screaming coming from his speakers

If anybody ever asks THIS is my aesthetic

Ron's ain't PLAYIN holy shit

This shit is dangerous lmfao it's like drinking a shake

I think this is the most beautiful piece of chicken Ive ever cooked

Pork tenderloin, creamy lemon pepper chickpeas with spinach, and some roasted carrots, beets, and onions