Two people will die in the next chapter of your life

I love looking back at my old notes and realizing that I accurately predicted my downfall like a couple of months before it actually happened

Nobody has ever asked me to do a spotify blend with them. This is a sign that I have failed as a human being

I'm getting cracked by Fate soon

I have decided to hire someone to track me down and try to kill me so that my life becomes more exciting

Does anyone have any Halloween costume ideas that aren't Dan Hentschel characters?

i like when social media platforms have proper moderation services that keeps it’s users safe

Most philosophers fail to take into account this one simple thought when talking about their optimistic life philosophies: what if I hate myself

God is a stronger person than me because if humans killed my son that I sent on Earth I would probably break down and cry and kill a couple people

In literature class about 100 years from now, teachers will show my text messages with various people as an example of "fumbling"

We should execute people who are unable to correctly store utensils. You're a grown ass person and you mix the little forks with the big forks. You're worthless.

24 years ago, MCR was created 🖤🖤🖤

the lion wants to let it all out and cry

The Horrible and Gruesome Killings of Mr. Badguystabspeople

wplace is a 6/10. i like placing those little squares but im a deeply miserable person so seeing other people have fun placing them makes me upset

White people love to buy spicy Hot Ones Pringles and then complain about the spiciness but still eat them because "you just always want more".

I just wanna drink tea dude

I'm still mad at myself for thinking that Lovejoy's music is good

Ever since I can remember, every day of my life has felt like that one scene in Better Call Saul where Kim tries not to cry on the bus

"Stop saying you wish you were wearing women's clothes and start wearing them!" Easy to say when you're ATTRACTIVE!!! I'm UGLY and CHOPPED and I have NO CONFIDENCE and I HATE my LIFE

The reason why Jesus and the apostles all sat on one side of the table was because someone put their phone so they could watch Youtube while eating

Hi @docwyattbeyond.bsky.social I was just wondering when will I be finally happy?

Some people forget that in the Bible there's a passage that says: "A man shall throw stones at another man he fucking hates."

felt like Anthony Bourdain

You're telling me 13.3 million people willingly tortured themselves by talking to a dry texter AI? Lost causes.

first beet, hello world