dropping in for a sec to show you this

okay okay here's Emma real quick so you know she's soft and good as always

I have realized I do not like this platform at all and probably won't be using it much anymore. I'll probably check in from time to time but if you want to talk to me I have a very obvious discord name. may you all be less miserable

Naked Gun very funny!!

I spent ten years thinking I was allergic to peanuts and then a few weeks ago I accidentally ate some peanuts and was fine. now I'm living the life. peanut butter cups. pad thai. my mouth is a little itchy but it's worth it

I'm the PC and I'm so excited to be kidnapped!

1:30am on a Wednesday and suddenly I remember the Rihanna plane

such a beautiful kitty!

don't be so mean to your hair

it's not the avocado toast and lattes that have kept me from home ownership, it's my insistence on buying the most luxurious toilet paper money can buy

wow Emma! you have such great taste! other people should buy Simplicity by @mattielubchansky.com too!!

an important thing I learned about myself this week is that I can confidently explain Death Stranding and answer questions about it. while high in a swimming pool

my new book is out today. it's about separatism and utopia and bodily autonomy and cults and capital and love and revolution and nature and sex and all the things we owe to each other. I'm so proud and excited and nervous for you to read it. i hope you do. simplicitybook.xyz

puppygirl on that pet pharmacy estradiol

she was ON ONE today. full of demands! the nature of those demands? who knows!!

me: I'll probably finish up Death Stranding tonight, I'm pretty obviously at endgame hideo kojima:

good morning, Gundam Wing is 30 years old youtu.be/0iaEZzOkcDw?...

I beg your pardon?

cutting all your hair off even if you have relatively short hair feels great and everyone should do it at least once

febreeze is short for female breeze

I rewatched Phantom Menace for the first. time since it came out last night and god. that movie sucks so bad.

I'm like 50 hours into playing Death Stranding and the main thing I'd like to say at this point is: zipliiiiiiiiiiinnnnesss

I don't think I've grown out the shortest parts of my hair enough to get a haircut I like tomorrow but also if I don't get a haircut tomorrow I'm going to have to cut my own head off

my grandmother died yesterday and for unclear reasons my reaction to this has been to go through all my clothing drawers and clear out all the stuff I don't wear and can give to a thrift store

eating watermelon with tajin

the netflix documentary about the Oceangate sub made my blood pressure go crazy so I'm calming down the usual way: watching ASMR videos of fancy bartenders making cocktails with exquisite care www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ccmz...

she is unbearably precious

eating a salad

glad I can turn off notifications for likes and reposts now. that's none of my business

I want to post my stoned drafts that I previously posted on twitter. I'm going to do it because they make me laugh

a friend had a dream a while back about a salad consisting primarily of blueberries and cilantro and I created it today (with bulgur wheat and a lemon-orange-olive oil dressing)

made this tonight and it's sooooo good! plain tortellini soup was a comfort meal for me growing up and this was a perfect punch-up. HIGHLY recommend making it during a summer storm

read my pornography!! it's silly and short!

I could be a Beloved Child of the House if I didn't need a fan pointed at me at all times lest I die

I have a story in this! It's Without a Trace, the first story in the issue, and it's short, silly, and smutty. Give it a read, and the rest of the issue too!

UGH I miss cohost

I wanna be honest with you: I have the week off of work and also have had cocktails and was like, maybe I bring back one of my old twitter bits. Like where I give people compliments or even people DM me their phone numbers and I leave them voicemails. But turns out I don't have the energy for that.

"haha, you do" I said aloud at one point in this. followed by "you really do, we have mutual friends who are exactly that." I WILL NOT REVEAL WHAT POINT I SAID THIS. it was really funny and you should watch it! also it's the least recognizable I've ever seen the Bell House stage, somehow

watching dropout and remembered the time I was so depressed and hated my job so much I did look into what it took to be a court stenographer. did I do that? I'LL NEVER TELL

I have a story in this! It's Without a Trace, the first story in the issue, and it's short, silly, and smutty. Give it a read, and the rest of the issue too!

Oh look, it's just what the doctor ordered: a new issue of Shousetsu Bang*Bang! Find the cure to all your ills in our Bedside Manner issue. Come take your medicine (for free) at www.shousetsubangbang.com/mirror/bang-...

I woke up with "I Got You Babe" in my head, which makes me worry I might time loop

sitting outside on a beautiful day drinking a beer and remembering how wonderful cohost was

NEVER doubt my dedication to soup. tortellini egg drop soup, made today in 98F weather, recipe on the 1st in the soup patreon. patreon.com/whitneyarner

あ！

literally don't know how to feel this emotion but playing carly rae jepsen's E MO TION (10 years today!!) is really helping

EGGS UP FOR ZOHRAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

been replaying phoenix wright

cuomo canvasser showed up at the door and I shut it in his face!