No idea who the Wolves vs Leeds commentator is, but I'm all for him. 'Instead of blandly saying what he sees' his commentary for two of Leeds goals was just shouting 'woah Goal!' #motd

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Thing is, the game is a bit boring, isn't it? There is no uncertainty about the outcome & there hasnt been since kick off. All the richest clubs at home to middle/lower ranked club are like this. With no uncertainty it's not really the same sport, not sure the Merseyside derby should be this.

Sometimes, just occasionally, everything goes right & you blow up the Death Star. Today is one of those days. #cricket

This quiz question is illustrative of just how shit football has become. When Liverpool became the 5th side to do this, they'd dominated for years & it had happened 5 times in first 100yrs of the Football League, fans knew this was a goal for LFC It's now happened another 8 times in the 36yrs since.

I don't want to play both sides of the argument during a time of heightened emotions when basic facts are ignored & our fundamental rights under threat. But I can't stay silent Spurs fans singing 'champions of Europe' is just as bad as Arsenal fans singing 'North London forever' #nufc

Once again, Arsenal fortunate to get a goal from a deflection I see.

He's running.

Would International tournament qualifying benefit from the Swiss model? Or possibly asymmetrical groups? Surely it can't be any worse. #ENGAND #NUFC #england

I swear, if any of those ITK accounts or thirsty local journalists start talking about players we need to sign in January/the summer during the next fortnight I am going to go fucking apeshit Can we pls just do some football for a few months as a nice break in the neverending content machine #nufc

So I think this is what our squad looks like now in a standard 4-3-3. Basically 24 man squad, plus four youngsters. There is a lot versatility which would give us cover options everywhere. But for UCL, we only have 21 slots, so Gillespie, Lascelles & probably Osula doesnt make that squad? #nufc

-We've bought one quality striker. -Liverpool have significantly upped their bid -Isak is forgoing loyalty payments/trfr cut. Three out of three means you sell. It's just taken an age because everyone involved has behaved like a right fanny. #nufc bsky.app/profile/thek...

Liverpool, Everton & sadly Sunderland happiest at Intl break for me. Man City, Villa & Wolves bricking it. #nufc waiting on a striker. #epl

It is hard to work out what Arteta & Arsenal saw in Liverpool's previous games against Bournemouth & nufc that made them decide to move the ball that slowly & be content at 0-0.

Wissa & Isak situation broadly analogous, the principal difference being that its suggested that Wissa was told he would be allowed to leave if a specific offer was recieved & Brentford feel that circs have changed Hopefully these kind of arguments are not played out in public in the future. #nufc

The song police represents a new low in online football bantz, IMO.

No shade at all to Leeds, but not sure what our coaching staff have seen in their games against Everton & Arsenal to think we really need to be five at the back. Barnes or Willock would make a standard 4-3-3. So it can't just be tiredness from Monday. #nufc

The really great outcome from this transfer saga is that Kraftwerk are a significantly cooler band than ABBA. Presume I'm going to be singing a rejigged verion of the model by the end of the month. #nufc

Bit concerned about today TBH. Away in Aug is the worst time to play a promoted side. Leeds probably the best of the three & have just been beaten in a derby, so the crowd/players will be up for it Half the side out, a striker that has 2 goals to his name & a new CB pairing Trouble at mill #nufc

Wife watching #thegodfather on TV for the first time in 30yrs, Still a classic & one of the kids is watching aswell for the first time. I am though, apparently ruining it for everyone with my constant references to #Simpsons dialogue. 'Thats a nice donut'

Wait, you're telling me that #MUFC & Dallas #Cowboys are both comically shit? At the same time? 90s me has dreamed of this day. Now all I need is Michaela Strachan to walk through the door & tell me to take her away from all this & all my dreams will have come true.

11 points gives you a chance of qualifying 12 points last year was safely in the playoffs. So can we win three games? Something like 7pts from Benfica, Atheti & PSV at home. Then 4pts from Union, Leverkusan, Marseille away. PSG & Barca just a free hit. #nufc

I think that's a good draw, avoided Napoli & Atalanta. No long trip to Kazakhstan or going to Galatasary, the Artic Circle. #nufc

Unzoomed #588 1/6 🟢⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️ unzoomed.com

I know the formation doesn't suit the players & its a complex system rarely used by others clubs etc etc etc. But he has been there nearly a year with almost all of those players. How many times does mufc have to do this to understand something is fundamentally wrong there.

I'd like to take the opportunity to fully endorse this message.

Spoke too soon, my friend. Spoke too soon.

Freed from desire, mind and senses purified Freed from desire, mind and senses purified Freed from desire, mind and senses purified Freed from desire...

Can't believe this hit from Ginola was 30yrs ago. I'd forgotten Beardsley's goal completely. #nufc

We really need to score whilst on top. #nufc

I have no intention of turning on tonight until 7.55pm, its all so dull, media frenzy in full flow the last few weeks. Liverpool look like a good side & rightly favourites to win the league again. Expect them to win, our season is measured against Villa, Spurs, Forest etc. #nufc #lfc

I've no idea how we score a goal, but if the God's of football have taught me anything. It's that tomorrow will definitely finish 3-4. #nufc

I have found my people.

After almost everyone has payed two games. Spurs, Forest & Sunderland would be pretty encouraged by the start? West Ham, Wolves & Aston Villa are probably most disappointed/nervous? Everyone else some version of we're what we expected, its been a mixed bag? #EPL

Apparently my post, dont call several hundred thousand people names is super offensive. #postwhichgotmeblocked

Does anyone know how old Max Dowman is?

As the clock ticks down the idea that Chelsea need to lose a striker & Newcastle need to get a striker, it becomes ever more the obvious choice. I'd like it to be a loan with an option to buy though. Then we can properly reassess the market next summer. #nufc

There's a fair amount of thoughtful, interesting & funny Liverpool fans on the #nufc timeline at the moment for obvious reasons. Chatting to them is cool But its also attracted the absolute dullards who think their football team is always in the right or use 'banter' unironically Its so tiresome

fans of both Liverpool & #nufc are giving partisan views on our statement. I think its interesting that we intimating we'd let him go if conditions were met, I guess they are: -We buy 1/2 quality strikers. -Liverpool sig up their bid -Isak hands in a trfr request. We're 0/3, its 20 August.

Now we are here. I still think the best realistic outcome for just about everybody is that Isak is sold after the Liverpool game for somewhere in the region of £130m. Before you all start shouting, I've got reasons. #nufc

Wonder if this about the fan having a go at Semenyo a few minutes ago #livbou

A quick guess based on not much: Liverpool Chelsea Man City Arsenal Aston Villa Man Utd Newcastle. Brentford Burnley Sunderland #EPL

League: 7th Champions Lge: Play Offs #nufc

My guess would be that Isak is sold to Liverpool after the teams play each other & #nufc buy a striker. We then get another in for the short term on loan/free/limited money & give ourselves a year to properly assess the market. Buying a new no9 is a big decision & PSR wise we cant make a mistake

A guess at the #nufc squad assuming all the senior pros make the 25man squad. We currently have 23 senior players & 4 youngsters. We're also looking for a FWD & MF which, assuming they are not u21, means no place in the squad for one senior pro (guessing Ashby) & no additional MF cover.

Some people have absolutely no idea the road football is on.

Please God, just let this transfer window end. It's driving everyone insane.

Electrical contractors, who refitted the bar and changing rooms at Morecambe post season, have been back in today and stripped the lights out, as Whittingham hasn't paid them. Come Aug 20th, when the NL pulls the plug, we won't even be able say 'will the last one to leave, turn out the lights'.

1st game of the season today, concerned I'm not match ready I missed the mtg that decided which player is at fault for everything, I havent downed 2pints in 15mins whilst eating a cremated burger all summer & I recently saw an old bloke fall over, didnt call him a diving cheat, I helped him up