found a BL where one half of the ship is a (conveniently attractive and buff) zombie and i am yearning

scolded niko earlier and showed her what she did to my leg because she decided to use my leg as a scratchpost and made me bleed really badly couldn't find her until i looked at my open trashbin and she'd been curled up in there sulking drama queen

i can't take a picture for obvious reasons but my kittens are on my lap like this rn and my legs are dying also for some reason niko has gotten much larger and longer compared to her sister

craving the love of an immortal whose life i will forever change by simply being myself that they will desperately seek out my reincarnation in every lifetime just to be with me again

i checked my order history and just realized that it's 1.4kg of chocolates i will be snacking on these until the end of the year

terrible things might keep happening to me and keep tearing me down and making me cry but i just bought craptons of chocolates for 13 dollars (i'm of sound mind) and they'll be here in a couple of days and will remind me that it's good to be alive sometimes

me: "it's starting to get less hot recently yayyyyyyy 💜" the reason:

NEW CARONZBEKALUZ SONG YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA www.youtube.com/watch?v=no8p...

reading "that's my good boy" in a fic, thinking "i'd love someone to say that to me (shyly tucks hair behind ear)", but also knowing that if someone actually did for real i will probably just scoff and scrunch my nose

can't believe i got tech to come in to my place today and told me the only possible solution to my issue aside from just waiting it out is to terminate my account and open a new one because he noticed only really old subscribers have been having the same issue as me 🥀

crying laughing bc i was filling up a form in my ISP's official page for an update and this came up i'm fucking losing it at "GET, HEAD"

tried to deter family friends from trying to set me up with people they know by saying i want someone cute, tall, and rich because i know they don't know anyone like that but i got hit right back with "how are you gonna find someone rich if you don't go outside"

masseuse while massaging me: "your skin is paper white and your age is leaving the calendar soon, you need to get out more and see the sun.... and also maybe see someone's son 👀" i just wanted a massage, man

trying to get out of this slump by drawing wiwi #JosuijiArt

just realized that my mom sent me only short shorts in her recent care package (she likes buying me clothes for some reason) she knows my pants-hating ass too well

thank you so much @tarosin666.bsky.social for this beautiful depiction of nienta! 💜 #nienta | #nientacomms

looking back at my activity, it's apparently been a month since i started having internet problems- i had to resort to using mobile data just so i could upload a file for a commission i just finished because my internet is so unstable i kept getting errors, i can't help but cry

why does it always feel like i'm being punished, why does it always feel like i have to endure a lot of frustrations first before i feel an ounce of comfort, why can't anything good happen to me without fearing that there is a price i have to pay, i'm tired, i'm tired, i'm tired

oc

i'm actually too sick to work on anything today... _ _) my body feels too heavy and too light at the same time hopefully tomorrow i feel good enough to finally finish some comms-

heard a really deep voice say something like "let's go" behind me (i am home alone)

i would like to apologize for having only been yapping for a long bit and not really posting any new art- i've been focusing on getting all of my April comms done, while having on and off fevers, and the stress of my internet situation hadn't been making things any better-

📌possible May situation

i give up

i'm a big boy, i shouldn't be crying over the fucking internet having a booboo

ISP updates: - finally received the prepaid internet kit i bought as backup - - tested speed, download speed is much slower than my main ISP (not surprised), upload speed problem is very much still apparent (tested on all devices, same results) - main ISP still shite

LMAOOOOOOOOOOO THEY RESCHEDULED THE TECH VISIT TO TOMORROW 🥲 (i hate them sm i wanna cry, i just want good internet- i'm paying ~30USD a month for this and i'm locked in a 12-month contract so i can't cancel even if i want to)

decided to plan my budget for May (when i take a break from taking comms) because i thought it would be a good use of my time and will help me stay awake, but all it did was give me stress headaches and a deep-seated sadness

tragic (i'm never getting silverash alter this banner 🥲)

i forgot i have to stay up for 4 more hours to see if my internet service is gonna ghost me again

had to put my fatass rooster on timeout because he keeps humping my male duck (we have hens) gay ahh rooster

my community only getting the best updates from their vtuber (it's me lowkey crashing out over my internet issue)

after this, i'm never gonna talk about what i wanted/planned to do in advance anymore because every time i even mention a schedule or an upcoming event something wildly inconvenient always happens it's like i got shooters trained at me at all times ready to curse my ass

i want this now 🥺 www.youtube.com/watch?v=hbcb...

been stressed to hell trying to coordinate w/ my internet service (issue still not resolved), kinda gave up &decided to buy prepaid internet that i could use while waiting + use as backup whenever had to take from the 150USD i was setting aside for more important things for this

if anyone tries to give me troubleshooting advice ONE MORE TIME i'm gonna fucking throw up in your mouth and make you choke on my vomit I'VE ALREADY DONE EVERYTHING!!! EXCEPT GET A FUCKING TECH VISIT!!! i'm in a very bad mood if it isn't obvious enough

i'm gonna 🗣️ KRILL (🦐) MYSELF !! 🗣️

had a dream where i was with a dream-supplied childhood friend who is basically my ideal type of guy- we were walking around an eerily quiet neighbourhood that we didn't really pay no mind, as if that is what we expected of the place?

i realized this is the first time i wore a hoodie since taking care of the kittens and they have taken a liking to it (they're napping on the hood and purring up a storm behind my neck)

can't be full of whimsy anymore without someone treating me like i'm fucking illiterate and can't do shit for myself

hate when people think i'm stupid just because i like to joke around

Not only is my upload speed abysmal, but my ethernet also just fucks off every time I disconnect the wi-fi I'm actually crying, I'm being forced to connect to the wi-fi only-

i wanted to stream tonight, but fuck me i guess

he hates my broke ass

i'm gonna put Catcher in Situations™ (the Situations™ being, the upcoming Contingency Contract- good luck, my baby boy-)

i love my puppy 🐶🐶🐶

naruhodo

my art assistants #onikaku

cries a little bit (a lot) i want them.... but the price... 😭

finally got our power bill and it shot up to 9k fuck my stupid chungus life