returned to the scene of the crime (revisited the diner where we had our first date 🥰)

this is a pre-holiday reminder to not comment on what or how much/little you think someone is eating—or your perception of their weight. I promise there are ppl in your life struggling w/grief or depression or in ED recovery or or or—& you have no idea. don’t be the one that makes it harder on them.

Hi, it’s Sunday— tell me (or show me!) a thing that made you smile this week. I’ll go first: I found this on our calendar, where 8yo excitedly noted her first little race coming up. Now your turn. 🖤

hey, psst— you are so many good & wonderful things.

“write yourself a strange little bio in the form of a pep talk” —sharing here in my continuing quest to share even a portion of the words I write, the words that make me 🖤

Hey— if you’re in eating disorder recovery & are listening to the “Allison after NXIVM” podcast, maybe skip episode 3.

haircut megan ✨

Love is consideration.

Tons of tiny ginger snaps for cookie Sunday. (Only after I got started did I realize the recipe said it makes “130 bite-size cookies,” whoops)

And regardless of any of the loud stuff that may or may not add value for us: Recovery is possible. It is not too late.

A reminder that your recovery is yours, & sometimes people are going to say things that— well-meaning or not— may inadvertently trigger you & may definitely not be for you or applicable to your recovery. & no matter how definitively they state stuff— your recovery is yours alone.

I’ve worked really hard on body neutrality— “I have a body”— and can even feel thankfulness that my body kept going even when I wasn’t sure I wanted to. I can also work a meaningful recovery without demanding something of myself that I’m not ready for— and might not ever be.

Once I saw someone well-meaningly say on here something like “you need to stand in front of a mirror and stare at your body until you find love there.” I think about this from time to time & as someone in eating disorder recovery— no, I do not, and that is okay.

An update: my subsequent piece didn’t advance any further— but it’s a piece I was still kinda proud of. Sharing this here because it’s part of the whole deal, & I don’t wanna just share the pretty, “perfect” parts. Not giving up. Onward.

Hey, it’s Sunday— tell me (or show me!) a thing you liked this week. I’ll go first: late afternoon in the woods. Now your turn. 🖤

There is no step forward in recovery that is insignificant or “too small.” —just in case you needed the reminder today

a little reminder for me & maybe you, too: you are worth being proud of.

I made a little post about a little dog and the response was overwhelming. Thank you for your words and for sharing them with me— our pets really are the best part sometimes, huh? Thinking of all the little best friends tonight— and of you, the humans who love them. 🖤

12 years ago this tiny guy very unexpectedly entered my world— & today, he very unexpectedly left it. You were such a good boy, Arrow. 🖤🤍

I wrote a couple of things the past two weekends that I’m kinda proud of. Continuing to be brave & pursue this dream & also being brave by sharing about it here. Kinda proud about all that, too.

Hi, I stepped back for a couple of weeks bc things have been heavy. But life keeps going, and it’s Sunday again— tell me something you like. I’ll go first: I like revisiting old favorite movies I’d almost forgotten about. Now your turn. 🖤

“…Practice any art, music, singing, dancing, acting, drawing, painting, sculpting, poetry, fiction, essays, reportage, no matter how well or badly, not to get money and fame, but to experience becoming, to find out what's inside you, to make your soul grow.” —Kurt Vonnegut

sometimes you just need to lay on your favorite human. I like to imagine she is soothed by my heartbeat.

An important update: there was a Hobbit/LOTR trivia game & I won first place! 🥔🥔🥔

brb, going to a hobbit-themed meeting

“…change your name change your mind change your ways give them time go back to school go back to sleep tell the secret you can’t keep begin, be done break a vow, make a new one call me if you need a friend, or never talk to me again— but please stay” 🖤

21 years, somehow. 🖤

You're not "choosing" to react. You're not "choosing" anxiety or depression. Your mind & body are reflexively responding & functioning in ways they've been programmed to. Changing those patterns involves more than "choosing" differently. Grace over guilt. Recovery is a project.

For anyone else facing a hard thing today— me too; you’re not alone. We’re gonna take it one hour, one minute, one breath at a time. We’re gonna go slow, and we’re gonna pause when we need to. We’re gonna be okay. Ready? Deep breath. Steady. We’re okay. Let’s go. 🖤

almost just posted a selfie to the work facebook page, whOOPS

happy national cat day to my favorites

sometimes lines in tv shows or movies hit my brain in just the right way. I’ve gotten a lot of mileage out of this specific mad men moment—

you are not a problem to be solved. —just in case you needed to hear that today.

You deserve a partner who shows up for you— even at times it’s inconvenient for them. Feeling v loved at the end of an incredibly hard day.

a little reminder for me & maybe you, too: you are worth being gentle with.

“It had a perfectly round door like a porthole, painted green, with a shiny yellow brass knob in the exact middle.”

AI is the worst. That’s the tweet.

a little reminder for me & maybe you, too: you are worth figuring it out with.

AI is the worst. That’s the tweet.

a little reminder for me & maybe you, too: you are worth the time it takes.

With every hour & every decision today, remember: there is nothing "selfish" about choosing yourself. In choosing yourself, your safety, stability, & recovery, you are also choosing to show up for every person or pet or cause you care about. Choosing you is choosing them.

🎶 whoa my head is on fire, but my legs are fine after all, they are mine

🎶a backless dress and some beat-up sneaks

gingerdoodles for cookie Sunday

Hi, it’s Sunday— tell me a thing you like. I’ll go first: I like when my boyfriend sends me the audio from my favorite silly little internet video—or sings it to me—because he knows it’ll make me smile. Now your turn. 🖤

🎶 let them say we're crazy, what do they know put your arms around me, baby, don't ever let go

sometimes you just can’t sleep unless you’re holding hands with your favorite human

Sometimes I think about all I’ve lost, all the things the hard years have stolen from me: how to play the piano, and chunks of memory, months of time, and how to lie in the dark and not be so afraid. And and and.

taught my 8yo how to play wordle tonight and y’all, her starting words are… something.