i wrote another basketball essay—this time it's all about LeBron James' left foot!! makesureyoudunkscreaming.substack.com/p/the-toes-o...

Looking to go on a reading retreat and live in New York? @pagebreaknyc.bsky.social is hosting one for @zeecarlstrom.bsky.social's MAKE SURE YOU DIE SCREAMING at Grateful Woods from March 28-March 30! You can register to attend at: www.pagebreak.nyc/retreat-10-d...

i don't want to think about "politics" right now, so I started a basketball Substack. My first post is about how Joe Mazzulla is a Satanist using dark magic to win at hoops. Consider subscribing if you enjoy the WNBA and/or NBA. open.substack.com/pub/makesure... #nba #basketball #hoops

extremely grateful to see my forthcoming queer thriller MAKE SURE YOU DIE SCREAMING included on this list alongside so many tremendously exciting debut novels!!! (MSYDS out April 8th!!) www.goodreads.com/blog/show/28... #booksky

so...i guess this is what happens when you google the name of my book...🫠 #booksky #writingcommunity

ignore that evil little voice in your head that says you aren't good enough—it's lying #booksky #books #writingcommunity #writer #art

3 reasons i'm writing books instead of raising children: 1) books are cheaper 2) books are quieter 3) books will never steal my car, drive to Boise, stab a cop, join a sex cult, nearly die, find Jesus, start a tech company, and donate their earnings to whoever our next fascist ruler is. #booksky

i’m not laughing i’m screaming in staccato

you can try to fix me, but i’ve already had two vasectomies

the same can be said of a truly great book #booksky #resist #writingcommunity

my partner just told me that i look a lot dumber than i actually am, and i have decided to take this as a compliment

2024 pop music is just Dolly Parton + Kraftwerk

i like reading books, but i LOVE falling asleep with a book resting on my chest #booksky

excuse me, dear bookseller, but do you happen to have Chicken Soup for the Soul of a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader Trapped in the Body of a 33-year-old Queer Writer Who Already Needs a New Hip? #booksky

everyone keeps telling me it’s unprofessional to scream in the bathroom at work, so if anyone needs me, i’ll be in the supply closet www.nytimes.com/2024/12/13/h...

people will repost the dumbest shit as long as a washed up celebrity posted it

Bob Dylan riding a giant sandworm through northern Italy while Oompa Loompa Army Hammer screams LISAN AL-GAAAAIIIIIIIIIB

i have the soul of a poet, the heart of a writer, and the carpal tunnels of a 150-year-old gymnast who really enjoys the pommel horse #writingcommunity #booksky

going outside without my phone makes me feel like Bear Grylls

say what you want about the people of Arkansas, their restaurants have all the c*nty-est signs

i hate the phrase “kill your darlings.” i love my ugly little darlings. i cultivate these mangy fuckers. i give them sun, water, gasoline. grow them up big and strong. now all my work is one huge, sexy darling. if you don’t like it, i don’t care. it’s not your darling. it’s mine. #booksky

i'd like to hook up with whoever wrote this #booksky #quote

all i want for Christmas is 24 uninterrupted hours of reading per day #booksky

we talk about literacy. we talk about attention spans. but how are young people supposed to pay attention with the constant threat of gun violence haunting the backs of their minds. TLDR: TikTok ain't the only distraction, y'all #booksky

Some Illinois schools would rather ban books than accept state grants. I don’t know what is less American: suppressing freedom of expression or turning down free money. www.chicagotribune.com/2024/12/08/i... #booksky

no offense BBC, but if this list doesn't include If You Give a Mouse a Cookie then it's not gonna tell you very much about America www.bbc.com/culture/arti... #booksky

sexiest Scrooges ranked: 1) Michael Caine 2) Mr. McDuck 3) Guy Pearce 4) Patrick Stewart 5) George C. Scott 6) 7) 8) 9) 10) Jim Carrey #booksky #filmsky

I take back everything I’ve ever said about New Jersey www.nj.com/politics/202... #booksky

i'd rather fail while rebelling than succeed while conforming #booksky #writingcommunity #art

thank you so so so much @debutiful.bsky.social for including MAKE SURE YOU DIE SCREAMING as one of your most anticipated of 2025! SO GRATEFUL! pre-order here if you wanna go on a queer-ass road trip deep into American's heartland of darkness with meeeeee: us.macmillan.com/books/978125... #booksky

Why is it that I consider myself an abject failure if I don’t achieve transcendent artistic greatness in the thirty minutes i have to write before I leave for work each morning? #booksky #art #craft #writingcommunity #writer

I love that lots of y’all read over 50 books a year. But these days, I read each book like it’s my last meal. I want to savor the language. I want to live between covers. I want to find god hiding in one of those rare magical sentences—a line the writer wanted to cut, but couldn’t. #booksky

an oddly ecstatic man on the street just screamed, "have a great fucking night," right in my face, and I now feel the need to pass his semi-frightening kindness along to all of you: HAVE A GREAT FUCKING NIGHT MY FRIENDS

if the only thing you do this weekend is read a book, that’s more than enough. that said, please also consider drinking some water so you don’t die. #booksky

If books are magic, then audiobooks are dead wizards who haunt your ears while you wash the dishes #booksky

exciting thought: the best book you'll ever read hasn't been written yet #booksky #writingcommunity

Someone please explain this to young people: Reading might not make you cooler. But it does make you smarter. And wiser. And kinder. And more interesting. And way more attractive. And okay, I lied, it DOES make you cooler. #booksky

okay, hear me out—people are allowed to take cigarette breaks at work, but i want to take 10 minute reading breaks once an hour, every hour...is that so wrong? #booksky

Favorite Hemingway quote: “Write drunk, edit soberly furious about the corporate capture of American democracy by sociopathic white collar criminals.” #booksky #writingcommunity #writer

MY WRITING PROCESS 1st draft: delusions of grandeur 2nd draft: debilitating nervous breakdown 3rd draft: brutal self-loathing Final draft: grammar and word choice #writingcommunity #booksky #writer

someone just told me straight hair is back in style but i'm gonna go ahead and keep my hair queer.

to everyone still committed to books and stories and the act of writing in spite of everything: thank you for making me feel less stubborn and delusional!!! #writing #booksky #writingcommunity 💙📚

i’m not bitter i’m just not ripe yet

i’ve always loved when people give their kids aspirational names like “Rich” or “Porsche” or “Profit,” and that’s why I’ve decided to name my firstborn child “Nepotism.”

you are not obligated to finish every book. you are not obligated to finish every book. you are not obligated to finish every book. you are not obligated to finish every book. you are not obligated to finish every book. (repost if you agree 👻 i'm looking for partners in DNF) #booksky 💙📚

do you ever feel like the only thing standing between you and a successful writing career is your chronic lack of independent wealth? #booksky #writingcommunity #writer 📚💙

how i feel opening MS Word this morning after ~accidentally~ falling asleep to Defying Gravity on a loop last night #booksky #writingcommunity #writer 📚💙 #wicked

may the writer-gods grant me the serenity to accept the sentences I should not change, the courage to change the sentences that suck, and the wisdom to somehow tell the fucking difference #booksky 💙📚 #writing #editing

i have finally reached 666 followers, and i'd just like to thank all of the wonderful book-lovers who made this possible #booksky 💙📚

#gratitude poem: EAT YOUR FEELINGS DRINK YOUR DREAD YELL AT YOUR FAMILY BEFORE THEY’RE DEAD