(slaps phone case) This bad boy can fit so much pet hair in its various nooks and crannies.

It appears that every kid in our neighborhood above the age of 10 has recently been equipped with an e-bike of the "wait, what makes this legally distinct from a motorcycle?" variety

A few days late, but it finally feels like Christmas (half the family is sick)

I just realized that I completed this whole shower rejuvenation project without having to make any extra trips to the hardware store. Can't decide if I'm proud or ashamed.

My brother, who will be driving 10 hours back home in a couple days, received a jar of some kind of preserves - very much a "refrigerate after opening" deal - and immediately opened it to smell it. His wife just rolled her eyes.

Who up grouting their shower?

Real estate agents love sending us mail about why we should sell our house. Bitch that’s where I live

I donated a car to charity a few years back and my reward for it is a pretty constant barrage of emails asking me why the fuck I’m not giving them more cars

Wait, isn't $22.5B the prize for first place in the town's talent show?!

The name "Popular Science" doesn't mean we shift our coverage depending on public opinion. It means we cover relevant subjects that are rigorously researched, reliable, and grounded in reality. And trans lives are grounded in reality. We see y'all. No matter what. www.popsci.com/science/tran...

This timeline fucking sucks.

Whoever formatted this Word doc will not see heaven.

Toffee time.

"i can't explain trans people to my child!!" oh so you're stupid AND bigoted? pick a struggle bitch

Aw hell, we accidentally bought wrapping paper with glitter on it.

Why did they call it Fansville and not Fansylvania?

I can't order two of anything anymore without mumbling to myself "through the magic of buying two of them..."

F1 is a cool sport because you have to periodically look for updates several hours after a race to see if the results have drastically changed. (nothing so far)

FedEx appears to be struggling with the concept of linear time.

A wagon with 3 pedals. I'm not feeling especially picky, but probably a Mazda6. Maybe a VW.

What's with the recent scourge of retailers (Best Buy and Home Depot, maybe others) that don't seem to be letting Google results go directly to actual product pages anymore? Who wants to see the name of the item, one photo, and a "see product details" button? Who's that benefitting?

I put it to you that Paul McCartney’s “Wonderful Christmastime” is not merely the worst Christmas song but is also in fact the worst song in the history of recorded sound.

Do people outside the US wear 6mm-zips?

Red Bull's strategist went up to receive their constructors' trophy - coincidence, or twisting the knife?

A Star Crunch is basically a 100 Grand patty.

Hearing a take here that the Macy's Thanksgiving parade has become too commercialized.

Hi, thank you for purchasing one (1) very specific item from us as a gift. We assume you want a twice-daily marketing email in perpetuity, yes? Don't worry, we'll send separate emails to let you know that your 35 cents in rewards money will somehow always be 3 days from expiration.

Guess I'm going to find out what hopebutter is.

I hope they had Mickey Mouse tell Lando he got disqualified.

"It's Lance Stroll time." - Gabriel Bortoleto?

All qualifying should be this wet. Hose down the track in Abu Dhabi or something.

Me: Brain, why did you wake me up at 3:30am? My brain: If you ever somehow befriend a crow, you should call it Mike Rowe. Me: ... Alright that's actually pretty good, thanks.

My dad has one of these with three pedals (I think his is 4WD, not certain) and except for being geared pretty low for American highways it's the most practical vehicle ever made.

January-Nate is apparently the goddamn man. I sat down tonight with the intention of re-teaching myself how to update some of the services on my home server that I've been neglecting. I apparently wrote a script to do it the last time I did this back in January.

I'm late to the party, but I think "Help, I don't know how to work around this continuity problem in the James Bond franchise" is a downright embarrassing admission.

Someone should invent a pet that vomits on the rug at 3pm instead of 3am.

Henry.

They've done it. They've successfully made air travel more unpredictable.

Carrot cake in the $1 tier is madness. Load my plate with 20 servings of that and I'm good.

We're at the dogs' usual dinnertime (DST) and there's some disgruntlement starting to happen.

Finally, that price drop alert I've been waiting 5 years for.

Is Lane Kiffin the 2024 Carlos Sainz of the 2025 CFB season?

Feeding America has a page where you can input your zip code and it'll show you all of the food banks near you overlaid on a map. If you need it, it's there. If you don't need it, think about donating money if you have it and your time if you don't. www.feedingamerica.org/find-your-lo...

Presumably with VR headset displays that extend into the UV spectrum.

Hello! It doesn’t cost anything to repost but it helps me spread the word about my small business. My online shop is full of bold & colourful prints, homewares and cards. I’m also available for freelance design work and art licensing. gailmyerscough.co.uk

Someone should invent a way to buy and sell things that doesn't involve a survey solicitation.

Staying out late and getting wild (at the Stardew Valley symphony concert)

Hey just so y'all know, all my posts are off the record. Thanks.

Dudes, rocks