Telling a Doordash guy to fuck off and get out of the store because he was holding up the self-checkout line to photo all his receipts, then me getting thanked by two customers was the cathartic moment of the night.

On this eve of fifty Novembers the winds still howl the bell still tolls. My breath turns heavy as we drift into the long cold night. The Fitzgerald stirs beneath. I harbor their echoes and cradle her steel. My waves bear the sorrow of all I have taken.

Honey, wake up, another stuck boat just dropped.

Me: *walking into work singing along with Katy Perry* "I ate a squirrel, and I liked it, the crunch of its tiny ribcage..." The HR lady as I pass her desk: 😨

I read that as "Skaven Technology" on first glance. @qrik.bsky.social

Thought my 9060 was artifacting, was dreading doing an RMA. An hour of Furmark stress-testing turned up nothing. Turns out it's the TV. Thing does turn 20 next March, and it's got nearly 23k hours on the clock. Seems okay with some minor tweaks to the display timing.

Think of all the things we could harvest from bountiful farms if we stopped wasting time, effort, and fertilizer on celery.

"Ave Maria" by Franz Schubert / Orchestra of St. Luke's, conducted by Michael Stern, soloist Joshua Bell, violin / Sony records sp. 97779

Comments I got from customers and cow-orkers today: - Were your eyes always yellow? - Oh, shit, that's *not* fake hair? - How are you doing that with your tail?

It's a bit of a mouthful........ Artist: claptonista https://b3ta.com/board/11422287 From the 'Two Authors One Book' challenge https://b3ta.com/challenge/twoauthorsonebook/popular/ #TwoAuthorsOneBook

"Detroit cop Zooms into court pantless" would be even funnier if you didn't know about the video chat platform, and imagine it was like, on a scooter. www.clickondetroit.com/video/id/hfu...

For being a helium balloon who wished to be a real boy, this guy has some good videos on audio equipment.

What I do at 1am: Watch video about a 10-cent audio chip, that mentions @paintyourdragon.bsky.social's work on recreating the Speak & Spell's LPC chip sound, that leads to me pausing the video, reading github, reading the Adafruit blog, then ending up on a video about the Dallas Children's Theater.

I agree, little bunny. 🔥🐰🔥

Props to the Dodgers organist for pulling out the deep cut of "The Neverending Story". #WorldSeries

https://prnt.sc/pvz14

Doctor said I need to lower my sodium intake, so I put the salt shaker on the floor.

Before you try to slide into my DMs, just know I'm built like this

Universe.

Woman was standing by one of the self-checkout stations, waiting for assistance, looked at me. I pretended not to notice. In frustration, she called to me. I approached, apologized, "Sorry, didn't see you there." She looked confused, then it clicked. She was dressed up as Sue Storm. 😂

Fuck ICE agents. We need NICE agents. 🇨🇦 https://youtu.be/S1yYGb1U31o

How far back in time are we looking, Google?

Customer saw my Therian necklace, asked if I was "A friend of of Bill W." 🤷🏽‍♀️

I know picking graphics for shows can be a challenge, but using MemTest86 for a Peter Schilling live show is certainly a choice.

Imagine your music, blasted at dank clubs and thundering over drug-fueled raves in abandoned London warehouses, having such a big impact on British culture that it's performed by HM Royal Marines at the bloody Royal Albert Hall. 🤯 RIP, Keith. 🫡 www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJBd...

Portland coming together to melt ICE with a protest rave

"...can't move very fast and can't see very well", says a lieutenant colonel who's never seen a fursuit dance competition.

Bigfoot exists and has a message for all the non-believers out there. #Bigfoot #Sasquatch

Stressed?

Hmm, an evil billionaire with control of a global satellite network is doing something mysterious. Fucker really believes he's Zorg.

New Minty vid dropped, "10 Things You Didn't Know About Alf". #ALF @alfsplaining.bsky.social www.youtube.com/watch?v=THdA...

Me hearing the song for the first time time, wondering why Rage Against the Machine was singing about the ghost of Tom Jones.... 🤔

Tired: Electronic music artist, Infected Mushroom Wired: Electronic music artist, Wild Mushroom 🎶🍄🎶 https://youtu.be/NbP2DgDp890

The smell of this reminds me of my dad.

Free Halloween costume idea: Dress as Satan, carry a large handbasket with a "FREE RIDES" sign attached.

When it comes to music, “If the cover art’s AI, I’m passin’ it by!™” Share if you agree

Further proving I'm a mature adult by calling it the "AA-Fart-Pee" when I see their stuff in the mail.

Some people really taking that "999 happy haunts, but room for one more" seriously. #Disneyland www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ZoR...

So Simply jiuce brand has a "spiked" version of their lemonade that's 8% alcohol, and that shit got me turnt. 🥴

describe your bluesky account in a single image

Helping a co-worker jump-start their car, I connect the cables directly to the battery. They worry, saying, "no, you're not supposed to do that!" Me: "it's okay. They say that so you don't explode. A little exploding never hurt anyone." Them: *backs away nervously*

Oh, no! My wallet!

In today's episode of "White people melting down over stupid shit", some lady complained the self-checkout was in Spanish, then went red in the face when I told her it was in honor of Hispanic Heritage Month, mumbling something about "bullshit DEI", before moving to one displaying English. 🤣

Always interesting things in the "Did you know..." section of the Wikipedia front page.

If you see this, share a pic from your device with no explanation.

💯 true. #Arizona

Manifest #94123 from Zuma (CONFIDENTIAL) 1. Spectral Fungus 2. Shrouded Shitposts