i updated my pfp and banner againnnn-

do stupid shit ? Get stupid consequences. Like losing our friendship. Telling me I'm just as bad as my abuser ? - bc I chose to end a friendship bc YOU recorded MY SHIT without MY CONSENT IDK HOW MANY TIMES ? YOU'RE NEVER ALLOWED IN MY SPACES EVER AGAIN.

Idk when I’m gonna change my stuff back. I probably should tho-

It’s one thing to be stupid. I consider myself stupid. But stupidity being the reason for lying and crossing boundaries is just … incredibly bad. I can’t believe I made space for someone like that. I deserve better and I’m going to continue to be more picky and vocal about what makes me uncomfy.

If you see this , quote with a gif of your first anime.

I found a clip of me from 2019 with porange in my hair. So it went back that far huh- Shitnen got nothin on me. *sits on my clip that’s visibly dated proving it’s been a consistent thing for me and not him*

I hate that closeted me is haunting me through my lore I’m writing and also in random thought. I thought I had laid her to rest. Why … why aren’t you [[ a s l e e p ]] ? I don’t want to be her again just bc everything hurts. I hate feeling like this. #transmasc #pmdd

I’m so happy to see that YouTube doesn’t want him. Like he talked badly about women in a clip (mental illness in a woman is a factory mishap ???) and everyone was shitting on him in the comments LMFAOOOO LIKE BRO YOURE A FACTORY MISHAP-

live, trying my best, in my lane, thriving? www.twitch.tv/asmodeusthe

So um yeah- Don’t be screen sharing your computer drives with my MY OWN NSFW VODS on them- God I can’t trust my friends anymore. It’s a big deal bc: 1) shitnen 2) it’s against fansly tos 3) the friend og said they had no plans of ever watching my nsfw content , so i felt lied to- Fuck liars bro.

I’m so tired of trusting people. I keep getting hurt.

It gives me so much anxiety the thought of asking people if I can cosplay them bc of what happened with Shitnen- UGHHHHHHH The trauma response needs to stop.

I went to hot topic today and this shirt is so gender AAAAAAA #femboy #transmasc #transboy #blonde #goth #emo

SUBATHON DAY2!!! We are doing giveaways today!! Thank you all soso much for yesterday, I keep crying about it so be gentle, I am really emotional today. www.twitch.tv/cute_mo_

I think without twitch I’ve been able to focus on strengthening connections with my community and friends. The people who saw me as only someone to collab with / network with haven’t talked to me or replied to my DMs in like a year or so … It’s real. People seeing you that way. But now I’m lucky.❤️

my therapy:

I meant pass away- not like pass gender wise lol I shoulda just said it like it is pffft-

For the first time in the last year and a half years during my week of #pmdd for the month , I don’t want to “pass” bc of Shitnen. Healing requires a village. And I’m so glad I’ve allowed myself to be loud , angry , and a petty ass bitch in retaliation to everything !! YUHHHHHHHHH FUCK NARC VTUBERS-

SUBATHON START!! New model by @Byakk0Tan reveal today! Timer starts at 4 hours but is uncapped. All subs and donos go towards my medical bill. www.twitch.tv/cute_mo_

Meet Dusty !! 👁🧵🔔 #mascot #vtubermascot #digitalart #witchy #dustbunny #dusty #cute #evileye #witchcraft

just found out about endometriosis? #periods #asmr

Meet Dusty !! 👁🧵🔔 #mascot #vtubermascot #digitalart #witchy #dustbunny #dusty #cute #evileye #witchcraft

welp my computer keeps shidding itself soooo yeah. That's why getting a new rig is important. ko-fi.com/kainenbitez

gonna be hanging out , eating my breakfast , and trying to spice up my obs. #youtube #vtubervsirl #streamer #live #livestream youtube.com/live/22ILLrd...

yknow, nya #fma #fullmetalalchemist

How is it I know not to update on full numbers (32.0.0 or whatever) when I have only one singular brain cell- Imagine not looking at your TL’s to get info on OBS before you update it as a content creator-

I love my toxic blorbo. You don’t understand your honor- I believe I can FIX HIM 💜❤️😩🥺 #jax #tadc #fanart #traditionalart #rkgk #sketch #theamazingdigitalcircus

I love my toxic blorbo. You don’t understand your honor- I believe I can FIX HIM 💜❤️😩🥺 #jax #tadc #fanart #traditionalart #rkgk #sketch #theamazingdigitalcircus

Shitnen and his community have been making masked links containing my handle , that are directed to his channel - sent to my fans during my streams and was gifting them free Twitch subs to his channel. Trying to convince them that I was impersonating him , when IT WAS THE OTHER WAY AROUND-

This unfortunately does not apply to me-

Slowing Down. 😒

I wanna post the new lore im cooking but uhhhhh ill keep the outline to ko-fi for now *rubs my hands together* Mini comic time !! 🥀🖤🌑✨ I also have a kofi work stream planned so , it’s the perfect thing (among other things) to work on in discord today ! ko-fi.com/kainenbitez/...

Hey guys just letting you know that Kainen on twitch is a transphobic , malicious , insecure bigoted grifter. He’s the reason I’m not on Twitch anymore. I will never be reinstated bc there’s a note on my account - “do not approve”. Someone saw the logs. I can’t believe it. #vtuber #envtuber

This shit is so much worse than we thought. There's some nasty and malicious shit that has happened ... I'm gonna be making a video at some point bc I'm done. Truly. I'm done being silent. I'm done being considerate of an insecure malicious asshole.

Just letting yall know I’m a caller. Like call me on discord to catch up with me !! Do it !! You won’t- I’ve been trying to do the same on my end bc I know that it means that much more to people. Gotta do things even if it scares me a lil.

Welp back to how the rest of this year has gone. Less than 24 hours. Rejected again. I’m honestly relieved. Saved me from having my nervous system being out of wack for too long. It’ll be okay. Imma keep going and growing without twitch.

I get to be sleep deprived for the next few weeks bc It’s twitch reinstatement request season Again. An indefinite suspension I’ve been serving for over a year and a half bc of the partnered Kainen. I’m trans and he wanted me off the platform so he could continue being the one and only Kainen.

Please help me get this out there! I also have a ko-fi Ko-fi.com/asmodeusthe

As always here’s my website 💜 boywife.online #transmasc #witchy #vtuber #emo #goth #femboy #neocities

HAD TO MAKE A QUICK EDIT #caseoh

I’ve been going back and for about posting this but I need to practice what I preach and let people help me if they want to. Long story short, GPU is dead, if I can get a replacement funded I’ll stream Jump King until I beat it, multiple streams if needed. ko-fi.com/napbitez/goa...

It’s one of those days where I’ve met my calorie goal , I got some good design work done , played the beginning of LGTS in my discord to prepare for play throughs , and ended the night doing karaoke with friends. What a great day … I feel so happy and thankful for what I have. 💜

Here's an update after the discord ko-fi stream ! ko-fi.com/i/IQ5Q71LITCF

omg this gave me GOOSEBUMPS- www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gHk...

guess what I'm up to in discord ~

I urgently need extra help this month with bills, please consider comming me on #vgen vgen.co/AsmodeusThe Also, Like what you see but don't see something available? Try a custom request.

Welp it’s official I just snagged my first artist made puppy ears 🐶💜🖤✨ Now I’ll have to have at least a short purple haired dogboy arc- #puppyboy

Don’t listen to those negative thoughts in your head. 88% of them are wrong. You had the wrong perspective. Your thoughts were clouded and skewed, by a whole lot of crap that has nothing to do with you. Keep going.

Gonna be streaming to discord at 3pm edt !! For kofi members / nitro server boosters :3c ko-fi.com/kainenbitez/... You get to hang out with me and see the cool shit I’m keeping under wraps ! Heres my last wip !! ko-fi.com/i/IL3L31LH4PF #kofi #kofimembership #artist #selfmade #vtuber #transmasc

I just recorded 51 minutes of rambling at 6am- I think I’ll refine it as a script and then record for a video at some point. I went deep into adopting traits around us to thrive , insecurities , insecure Vtubers = tearing down others for looking similar , being open and honest about my mask , etc.