I hope all the taylor stans now realize that the thing about the Beatles is that on average they got BETTER and MORE SELF AWARE as they went on and not like immediately more stupid and dumb

Damn whats this like could never be me I have exactly the opposite problem

Other musicians listen to their track and go "yep that's perfect" meanwhile my dumb ass is like "wow this sucks but I have to put it out otherwise I will cease to be"

The eternal quest to make one (1) song that is actually good (just one)

This thing keeps happening across all my apps where like, only some touch controls work. Its not dependent on the area of the screen (cuz scrolling always works) nor does it seem to be consistent even within the app itself...like only certain buttons wont work. Restarting the app usually fixes it

I wish I was ninajirachi but alas I am a brain broken politics enjoyer

In anticipation of Travis Kelce's transition, I will start referring to her with the proper pronouns #gaylor #shesstillgay

My job is sooooo booooooring being an adult sucks ass

Im at urgent care but for pets and this shit is so swanky and bougie if only human urgent care was like this

Laying down rules

I have turned twitter into an app that I cannot freescroll while at work (there is a camera pointed on me at all times at my current profession)

Mfw im stuck outside the club

@faltydl.bsky.social thank you for sharing this beautiful record with the world!

it's lowkey f'ed up that #REMATCH doesn't let u be fat like i wanna pretend i can run

"I think, Theresa I am" - @elliesium.bsky.social

I think their should be r/AITA but just for the queers I feel like the default one cannot accurately assess situations involving people who aren't straight

Mfw I can't get deported back to Italy anymore

I want this video to blow up so much I lose my right to due process youtu.be/ddXMZANDfX4

That's me!

It's true! I am playing this! If u are in the area come say hi!!!

I literally just put out a song about moordering the prezident and none of you even cared like a little bit

I'm so tired of lying about how I feel all the time

What if there was collections but like for piss

They should swap out Brazil for Pakistan so that the acronym would be PRICS

praying that soviet satellite hits JK Rowling's house 🏠 ☄️🙏

So ur saying I could live a nice quiet life in my beautiful house with my beautiful wife and our beautiful cat? Fuck that shit I wanna be famous!!!!

New diary entry about how I am (not) giving up on all of my dreams open.substack.com/pub/theresas...

Currently playing all 7 of the Coachella live streams at the same time ama

Wait so if trans people aren't real then how can they ban trans people from the military. If trans people don't exist then you don't need to ban them cuz they aren't real

NEW: Inside the Plan to Funnel Taxpayer Dollars to Religious Schools @alecmac.bsky.social w/ @newyorker.com

Me every day

Another banger from the goat

Okay posting for the engagement let's see give me some good shit algo let's go doubles doubles!!!

An absolute classic

The idea that Alec of all people somehow might not have known this was possible is like, actually hysterical

I h8 life

Slowly gaining new appreciation for just how fucked the American medical system is

Like are you really gonna let down not one but TWO mommies by like, not tuning in??????

Me too

This rocks

Bluesky feels like obama era USA

If hoes don't get cold then I guess I'm not a hoe cuz I am so cold wtf

Might have to stop speaking to all men soon

Trying to avoid crashing out ama

None of you are prepared for when this man blows up youtu.be/aIguUMm3TXU?...

Officially a weed now (review coming soon)

If I get 1 more subscriber on my YouTube I will smoke weed

My best cenk chats