“We need to ban all stimulants because they’re addictive,” they said as I sat there on day 6 of forgetting to go pick up my ADHD meds.

I keep seeing this meme floating around but I made a slight adjustment to it because we all know that Dave was wildin’ out on those Zoom calls.

Day 2 of asking @bsky.app to increase video time limits to 90 seconds so I can post my video content over here, too.

Bluesky, I am BEGGING you, please increase video time limits to 90 seconds!

Live your life. Be yourself. #inspiration

I didn’t watch the inauguration because my mental health deserves better, but the highlights I’ve seen lead me to believe that we’ve found Carmen Sandiego and that a lot of people think Musk giving a nazi salute is somehow an autism thing?? THIS TIMELINE IS WHACK.

At first I was bitter about everything that happened on TikTok, but then it caused me to take a step back from social media, reevaluate everything, and realize how nice it is to take breaks more frequently and limit my daily interactions on these platforms. My mind and soul need better balance.

Well… this sucks.

I just dropped an entire opened box of pizza on the floor upside down and I think this is the point where I absolutely lose my shit tonight. #pizza #badluck

I don’t understand the raving about this app. The character limitations and video length limitations are awful and there is absolute shit engagement on most posts here. Someone please enlighten me what is so great about it because it’s been unengaging with a shit algorithm for me.

In my house we have two outcomes for bananas. Either 1 banana of the bunch gets eaten while the other 7 get lost on the counter & we forget they exist until fruit flies appear and we discover their blackened banana corpses, OR we eat all 8 bananas the same day we bought them. There is no in between.

I remember a time before DMing when we called it IMing because of AOL Instant Messenger (AIM). Also, if you’re as old as me, you can hear the door opening and door closing sound effect by just reading the words AOL Instant Messenger.

Imagine if snakes could cough.

Yesterday at work, I had a meeting where I spent an hour trapped in a conference room that smelled like broccoli farts from the prior occupants.

Being 42 is wild because in my head I still feel like I can do the same things I did when I was 22, and this is probably why I constantly throw my back out.

This sums up ever single work e-mail I’ve ever sent.

When I die, I want someone to switch out my body with a giant cake replica so when the pathologist cuts into me to perform the autopsy, he can either be very disturbed or have a really good laugh.

This little life of mine summarized in one photo.

While sitting at an Urgent Care today, the wait was so long that someone DoorDashed a pizza to themselves in the waiting room. I have seen it all.

The best calendar I’ve ever purchased in my entire life. Black and white portrait style photos of goats along with inspirational quotes to enhance the dramatic effect is a level of emotional depth I was not prepared for. Even the font within the calendar is perfect. 10/10, would highly recommend.

The year is 2024 and we have cameras in our pockets that shoot 4K. There’s no reason that every new picture of Bigfoot should still be blurry at this point.

How fun.

Recently while visiting the North Carolina Aquarium, I learned that there is a type of fish with this name. I want to know whose job it is to name fish and birds because I want that job. #themoreyouknow

There are few things as unnerving as when your cat is crouched in hunting posture and staring fiercely at the gap underneath your refrigerator.

Meet Gerard.

To whomever needs to hear this: DO NOT PLUG SPACE HEATERS INTO POWER STRIPS OR EXTENSION CORDS.

Yeah, ADHD meds are great and they’ll allow you to hyperfocus, but the problem is that you still have to direct where that hyperfocus goes, because you’ll either clean the garage from top to bottom like you had planned, or you’ll spend 8 hours building a LEGO replica of the Parthenon.

When you create a new account on this app, it asks you to like 10 different posts to teach the algorithm what you like. Yet from the moment I’ve joined, the only thing they’ve shown me are pictures of fucking squirrels. How can I show the algorithm what I like without more options being presented?!

Discuss.

Not to be dramatic, but the 60-second limit for videos on this platform is going to be the death of me.

#ADHD Motivation Problems

I’m gonna level with you — I’m probably going to forget this platform exists in about two days because how the hell does anyone keep up with using a thousand different social media apps?!