She's a shit manager. My old managers were actually fucking human & wouldn't dock me for shit because they have empathy?? I'm fucking unmotivated, my company disregards my doctor notes, there's no sick time. I think my level of performance is pretty fucking apt considering.

Manager told me shes docking my performance + I need to come into office. - sole income, can't afford unpaid days - hospital 3-5/mo + blood/labwork - forced on a project I didn't want to - vision throbbing + nausea when exposed to light - a mental breakdown every day Cut me some slack. Fuck.

I forgot I scheduled the driver license conversion written test THE DAY BEFORE MY BIRTHDAY. Actually, I went in Oct. The soonest was Feb 13, and by that, I mean, the nice guy did his best to schedule ASAP before my US license expires on Feb 14. If I survive, please fund my crane game addiction.

I know we like to shit on US Healthcare but I'mma be real. My doctors there were willing to work and share info. They're willing to consult on cases and accept labwork done by others. I wasn't charged 30-40 USD for every referral letter, doctors note, or prescription either.

I just got handed a prescription by the hospital, told me to go somewhere else to get it filled, and then come back to them to get injected. Like fuck you? You knew this was happening 2 weeks ago, you couldn't have acquired the drug AS A HOSPITAL AND CHARGE ME?? And I have to repeat it in a week.

5 hospital visits and it's only January. I'm so fucking tired. This fucking hospital is pissing me off.

It's terrible & morbid but sometimes I wish I had cancer instead so I actually have a chance of being cured instead of dreading the day I finally lose my vision to this chronic illness. I might even die on the immunosuppressants, the treatment. At least I've lived the best life I've been able to.

I got rejected for the job I wanted. I start immunosuppressants tomorrow. I'm depressed, addicted to crane games (Japan's dangerous), and unproductive at my job. I applied to 5 more jobs tonight. Please feed my depression, addiction and health care 😭 Donations via kofi, comms via ko-fi/vgen.

I found my Mexican food spot. Bless this restaurant for existing in Japan and near me.

Not me being stupid anxious and telling my physician that I didn't want to see him on my birthday. INSTEAD OF JUST SAYING THAT I'LL BE OUT OF TOWN FOR MY BIRTHDAY, which is accurate...

I miss web 1.0

Friend: I have a lot in my savings. I can live off of it for like a decade. Me staring at my hospital bills, thinking about future bills, rent, food, etc. ... O-kay, silver spooned, healthy, slacker, living with your mom white boy who "can handle being blind for a week every month."

When being immunocompromised is a way better alternative than being shot by ICE. I don't think I can come back to the US in this climate. I'm not white. I don't habitually carry my passport/naturalization certificate as they're expensive. Plus, the latter was signed by Obama. Isn't this insane?

Worst part are doctors dillydallying with treatment while my eyes get worse with proof. I wish I could have my routine eye injections again. My QOL has dropped immensely with how awful my vision is & frequent headaches/nausea from bright environments. Humira is expensive too... Sigh.

8 vials of blood, 1 urine sample, 4 xrays, and 1 ekg later, all results that don't take up to two weeks came back within normal levels. Sigh. I've had my illness for 26 years, please listen to me. Japanese doctors, aaaaaa

Japan, I promise, you don't need this much of my blood and urine. I've had so much blood and urine taken from me for labwork, multiple xrays, CT scans, EKGs. I'm even scheduled for an echocardiagram at the of the month. I don't have sarcoidosis!! I don't have any symptoms but my eyes since 10!!

Company: test takes 3-4 hours, create a fresh Django app with a cmd for x, UI with db, and provide instructions. Must work on Mac or Linux, don't use Docker. Explain why you didn't finish. Me: OMFG NON OF MY WINDOWS MACHINES ARE SETUP FOR CODING. Didn't even have git, AHHHHH

Meanwhile, the middle layer of my eyes are swelling from the inflammation leakage in the back of my eye. This is what's causing me to have poor visual acuity and makes me so sad. Sighhh. I miss my US meds so much. I really don't want to take Humira 😭

My current company is insane. Instead of letting me WFH, they want me to take a 40% paycut and go on a 6 month leave. And then what? How is that going to help with my CHRONIC DISEASE FOR 26 YEARS?? IT'S NOT GOING TO MAGICALLY GO AWAY IN THOSE 6MONTHS??? Tf is wrong with these idiots.

I pulled the bad fortune at Sensoji Temple 😭 I was so upset, I didn't take a photo and tied it right away. Please send me best wishes for my hour-long job interview tomorrow 😭

Wtf are you doing America?!! Drone strikes are not OK. I don't believe this is about drugs or legality of Maduro's presidency. I guess Earth may survive the AI bubble because we'll just fucking obliterate ourselves right now.

My friend took me to Rokkaen... And I forgot everything she told me about it. Then started a movie Ive been meaning to watch & realized, "IVE BEEN HERE. SHE TOLD ME THAT IT WAS SHOT HERE" 💕 #MyHappyMarriage #LiveAction (officially doesnt have eng subs so Im using the japanese ones to study)

Feels weird to go from 33rd to celebrate New Year's to the 9th. I hope everyone is getting their celebrations and relaxations in! 💕 May the next year be kinder, gentler, and also bring wonderful surprises and experiences to all 💜

良いお年を、私の大好きなサラリブ－ス 2026に戻る！！楽しみしてください 💕

I've started a gofundme in case anyone would like the full story on what's going on, my gameplan to safety, or would like to help out. No pressure as I understand everyone has their own hardships. I appreciate any bits of kindness anyone can spare!💚 gofundme.com/f/help-afauxi-escape

The spoils. Goldship isn't actually my win. It's intern's (who won it at 200yen) And not pictured is a keychain and a bag I won at the chocolate factory from their crane game and pillow toss game.

I've apparently found a unknown skill?? I've won 7 times at crane games since my first win. The cost of prizes still exceed the amount I've spent, including the losses. I've only failed to win 2 things.

Hiya ~ I'm Abe / Afauxi! I'm a matcha fueled fox who usually streams art, singing, or a variety of games on twitch. I can be a bit of gremlin but I strive to make my spaces cozy & chill. Maybe we'll run into each other sometime? 🍵💚 #promosky #vsky #envtuber #vtuberen

I just ate.... A pizza toast... That had an egg sando... Wtf... I'm so full.... Please roll me around today... Were about to go to a chocolate factory tour that gives samples too... Aufhhhhh dyingggg

If you're going to visit another country and staff is trying to speak in English to explain, you shouldn't go, "I don't speak Japanese." And god, if you're taking pictures indoors, don't fucking point at the staff with flash on. Yes. These are Chinese tourists I'm trapped between.

#夜は猫といっしょ meow #nightswithacat Found a #gachapon with this sweetheart!!

Merry Holidays! 💕💜 #hokkaidomilkicecream #croissant #whitechristmas #hokkaido

AND SNOW EEEEE IT'S BEEN MORE THAN 10 YEARS MY BELOVED SNOW

I've never been more excited to exist in SINGLE DIGIT TEMPS (celcius) I'm eyeing that -10 in pure excitement.

I watched them mess with the window controls and opened it. Then proceeded to complain that it's cold... Lol...

I'm sorry... I'm a believer... Ill take American tourists over Chinese... And here I thought it would just be Americans who pronounced sake as "saki"...

Once upon a time, it was BSB vs Nsync. I'd like to say, I think we all know the winner. It's great watching BSB do a 2025 "I want it that way." Honestly, I'd have watched them in Vegas had I realized they had a residency there back in 2018!! 😭

I cry in my English dyslexia, sobbing

Living in Japan has made me realize something I've taken for granted: BEING ABLE TO READ MY OWN MAIL INSTANTLY 😭 Also, I hope my US drivers license will come soon....

I've been so discouraged at work. It's a bit cyclic. I like doing an excellent job so it hurts + confidence is shattered when I'm performing subpar. It feeds into my imposter syndrome. On the other hand, my company clearly doesn't care about me so I refuse to give them that level of work...

I've learned recently... - WFH is best due to chronic illness - Except for stand ups, I can't stand having 1+ meetings daily (AND having 1:1s with several people weekly) - I'm not made for large companies - Managers who can adjust instead of applying textbook mgmt tactics

Today I met Nagoya Chiitan. I love Nagoya Chiitan. Thank you. I am now on a subquest to meet all Chiitans.

Ｎgl, maybe I should become an artic researcher. I kinda liked that room....

Got to experience a deep freeze room, -30C. I WANNA GO AGAIN. Also hair froze kekeke

I WON AT 600円 やったぁぁぁぁぁ

"You can't have your US eye drops," they said. "You have to use our Japanese ones," they said. 3 days after running out of my American drops and of using the Japanese ones, WHY ARE MY EYES FLARING UP AND IN PAIN?! Jfc.

I realized if Im not aiming for a specific art style, aka Im drawing "my style," Ill never like it. Because theres no standard to meet, how well it compares, etc. Art is hard :( This is why Im a software engineer but Im not good at that either. Depression 🌈 Still don't regret moving at least.

I spent the past three days working on this. We met her over the weekend, she's so adorable!! I hope to see her at other events 💜 #digitalart #clipstudiopaint #chibi

Please stay safe to those in Aomori and surrounding areas. Evacuate ASAP. This also reminds me that I need to print out the evacuation map for my area because I'd be so lost otherwise.

I'm not sure if it's a good thing or bad thing that my depression is manifesting by pouring hours into art. On one hand, I'm drawing. On the other, I'm depressed. I'll just be grateful I can still see to do art.