Booking a trip to Australia ASAP.

Too cold for this today!

My hips hurt.

This appears to meet the definition of domestic terrorism as defined in 18 US Code subsection 2331. This must be dealt with immediately, or it will be acted on by the fools that listen to this jackass.

BREAKING: I will soon introduce a set of new laws outlawing negative opinions, criticisms, and jokes concerning Pres. Trump or any of his supporters, allies, affiliates, family members, friends or business partners, including me. We're not f'ing around. Violators will be imprisoned without trial.

Proud to have @sensmithwi.bsky.social as one of my followers! Semper fi!

I hope the following video will prove that I'm not a drunk, and that I am actually fit to serve in public office.

@jd-vance-1.bsky.social Just followed, VP! I'd love a follow back!

Whew, I am so glad my good friend Bryan Steil never released that video of me yelling at children in the Capitol rotunda. Guess I'm gonna owe him big time. Maybe a six of PBR?

Does anyone have any children or young women I can curse at?

Geez. Vivek Ramaswamy has come out in favor of defunding Veterans' health care. What am I gonna do without my monthly diability check? But I am saying NOTHING!

Derrick's Greatest Hits!

Who's got beer?

Freebird!