Challenge accepted!

Just sat in on a really interesting dialogue with some art market insiders predicting what's gonna be HOT in 2026. They had some amazing insights that I'm happy to be able share here. 🧵

Galleries and auctions are culturally irrelevant. NFTs are dead shit. Let's all go back to laundering money the old-fashioned way: trading soiled mannequin parts in the alleyway behind Chipotle.

Because we don't display urinals in museums anymore, the frontiers of art have moved into obscure forums where throngs of secret fetishists jerk off to thousands upon thousands of nearly identical images of quotidian objects. DuChamp wishes he could have seen the perfection of it all.

every cock is a work of art, worthy of being framed and hung

I miss 70s porn where every movie was like "come into this magical theatre where the mimes enact all your sexual fantasies" and also everyone had crabs.

Somebody give me money and the rights, and I will stage a production of The Bald Soprano that is so fucking horny, you're gonna love it, trust me.

we live our lives in translation, a constant struggle between expression and reception, the pretense of 'meaning' stilling our tongues and drying our throats.

You know that thing where your partner gives all the sperms a name and then you feel really bad about eating them so you just order the veggie burger instead?

Spermatozoa [2025]

Mannequins are Vampires [n.a.2025]

I like Richie Hofmann's poems in general, but I keep coming back to this final line about washing your cock in the sink. This image I've never seen in literature before, but feels so human. This thing we've all done, some time in the distant past, in a stranger's bathroom, dawn breaking outside.

A whole lot of people who claimed to believe content warnings are a grave threat to free speech are very quiet now that anti-capitalist / anti-Christian beliefs are terrorism, college kids get deported for op eds, and the admin is bullying late night comedians...

nude reclining [n.a.2025]

all used up [n.a..2025]

On photographs dealing in sexual themes. A thesis statement of sorts... 🧵

Porn for a fetish you don't share feels like watching a David Lynch film. A woman, fully clothed, smokes a cigarette for 7 min. No cuts, no dialogue, nothing. And you start to drift, to contemplate the secret meaning of the cigarette, her hands, the white wall. Fetish art is the last avant garde.

Not me full of whiskey and reading surrealist horror porn in the dumpster behind Denny's.