Some personal news: I bought a jet today from some guy named “Doug”.

Just watched the “NHL in 30” replay of last night’s Habs game. Unfortunately they still lost.

Happy Earth Day everyone. Try to do something good today for this planet we all share. Hello also to those from other planets on here.

Rest of world: “No shit”.

a man just drove by in a Dodge Charger with the song “you’ve got another thing coming” blaring from the stereo. Man i hope he gets that raise today.

Being a dad is 95% just turning off every light in the goddamn house.

Wrote a little something for my 55th birthday today. You don't have to be 55 to read it. Good talk pattersonian.ca/2026/04/free...

We should line up the various Westons and do this. Especially Galen Jr…

“The Power” by Snap! just started playing in a cafe I was in. So I instinctively started the “running man”dance like I would when the song was first released in 1990. And just as instinctively, the females around me, fled.

Happy to see the astronauts have successfully landed. And as someone who has been on several flights that landed with no gate crew to greet the plane right away, I feel you.

As someone who had to drive through Toronto traffic twice today, I’m very jealous of the Artemis re-entry speed And that they don’t have to deal with a bunch of arseholes driving all around them. Especially the ones driving Audis.

looked towards the moon in the night sky last night but couldn’t see any sign of Artemis ll. Hopefully the astronauts remembered to turn the headlights on to “automatic” mode.

Perfect quote. Also, when the movie is made of this man, he will be played by Leonardo DiCaprio…

Dear Astronauts, Please say hi to this guy for me…

Want to wish all my practicing Catholic friends a good, Good Friday. Which, given the events of the day, is the most ironically named date in the Catholic calendar.

Wishing a speedy successful journey to the crew of Artemis ll. Hopefully they’re splitting gas money equally.

Hello friends/comedy fans who live in or near London Ontario…

Ford looks like he’s about to break into Riverdance here…

I think I join us all in saying, it should have been Coffee Crisp.

My daughters fighting over the last pancake at breakfast just now…

If you’re ever faced with two young daughters set on making “slime” that they promise will “not stick” to surfaces, know that they are lying to your face.

…same. Except I wasn’t listed on the WonderCon website.

The “baking flour” was cocaine.

My daughters got all their mom’s good looks, which is fortunate for them. But they got all my utter indifference towards making it to the school bus on time in the morning. Which is bad for me.

Habs.

My daughter has the day off school so my wife booked her a hair appointment then asked me to go to the salon with her. So l would have to PAY for said appointment. My wife is a devious genius.

I think this is important and I hope the Premier of Ontario is listening. But he’s probably too busy doing a deal under a bridge to turn the Greenbelt into a Thermea Spa.

This is heartbreaking. Especially since caused by human error. deepest condolences to the deceased.

Dear daughters of dads, If you are ever in a national swim tournament and your dad spots you on deck and waves at you and you see him, PLEASE WAVE BACK. Otherwise your dad will look like a random man who has shown up at a girls swim tournament. Yours truly, Scarlett’s dad.

I’m a few days late posting but this is the St. Patrick’s Day card I received from our 6 year old Norah. She explained that Saint Patrick had magical poop. And is just as powerful with whales as with snakes.

Toy stores are a little different in Quebec city…

My travel buddy to Quebec today is very impressed with the @aircanada.bsky.social Maple Leaf lounge facilities at Pearson.

Shout out to whoever is playing guitar on the Aeroplan line hold music today. Really grooving. Despite playing same lick at least 59 tomes now.

I just asked my wife if she would “like me to bring her anything upstairs” and she ecplsined she’s been at the gym for 50 minutes now. In marriage, communication is key.

Thanks to all who laughed at us at The Danforth last night:)

My Spring Haiku: The snow yields to warmth It’s melting reveals new life but also dog shit

Ford is getting more deranged by the day. If he keeps this up he’s going to become President of America.

Obviously I would have preferred a different outcome in the gold medal game. But I’m happy to see these amazing women athletes, wherever they’re from, selling out big arenas.

Canada currently leading Philadelphia in an exhibition baseball game. It’s a start.

I just accidentally typed today’s date as “Mach 2”. So i’m hoping it goes by very quickly.

Drove 12 year old daughter and her friends home from school today. Listening to Olivia Rodrigo songs. Said, “I’m going to play you a song I like about Fridays by a band called “The Cure”. Found this. Think I manifested it. music.apple.com/ca/album/fri...

Good morning. Is he still talking?

looks like @brittlestar.com nailed it again. I wish he was MY dad.

it is so cold in Toronto I saw a group of teenagers on their way to school who looked like they were seriously considering wearing gloves, toques or at least zipping up their coats.

Dear Canadian Catholics at mass right now, Putting in a word with the Canadian hockey god, Gord, please. Good talk.

Next goal fairly big now. #Olympics #CanadavsUSA #overtime #ICEbutinagoodway

Currently watching my second full curling match today, which is two more than I’ve watched in my previous 54 years. That’s the magic of the Olympics. #GoCanadaGo #curlCanadacurl #hurry! #off!#anothercurlingterm

Early tomorrow morning (8am Eastern, 5am Pacific) Canadians all across the country will be called upon to do what we do best: take advantage of bars opening early to drink beer/Caesars while watching hockey). #GoCanadaGo