I get quite a bit of these, but it's really easy for me to suss them out, because nobody who's actually read my books would praise them like that.

When I was 11 years old, I wrote two different world lore bibles for two different school projects. They had histories, languages, maps, and persons of importance. If I, a stupid, stupid child, can do that without the aid of a regular computer, you have no excuse.

The facists may have exploited some Americans attitude of 'rugged individualism' to scare and lie their way into power. But I have hope that they failed to account for a significant part of that same attitude: We don't like to be told what to do.

RIP local sexpot Trevor Moore. www.youtube.com/watch?v=KivC...

If Trump invades Greenland and ravages it of its minerals, we'll have to start calling it Brownland, and then he won't want it anymore because it's Brow- y'know it's just faster if I just call him a fucking idiot.

They'll probably be in the background somewhere hiding under a pile of clothes.

I was only opening the ChatGPT tab to ask it for directions on how to navigate AWAY from ChatGPT!

Just learned I am one of the most effective weapons against fascism.

The beatings will continue until you stop calling us Beaters.

STEPHANIE: Punching Nazis is the American dream! The Rocketeer did it. Indiana Jones did it. And Scooby-Doo did it! MICHAEL: When did Scooby-Doo punch Nazis? STEPHANIE: I think it was in one of the episodes with Phyllis Diller. -- DUCKETT & DYER: THE CURSE OF HITLER'S TOMB (forever forthcoming)

I'm faster than a speeding building and able to leap tall bullets in a single bound!

IRON MAN: What... are you? VILLAIN, EMERGING FROM THE SHADOWS: Foolish Avenger, prepare to meet your doom at the hands of M.O.D.E.M.*! [*Mental Organism Designed Exclusively as a Modem]

I'll see you in health

IRON MAN: What... are you? VILLAIN, EMERGING FROM THE SHADOWS: Foolish Avenger, prepare to meet your doom at the hands of M.O.D.E.M.*! [*Mental Organism Designed Exclusively as a Modem]

If I had to pick one Calvin and Hobbes comic that irrevocably influenced my outlook on life, it would have to be this one. I still think about this one often.

Viscount Fizzmark

My New Year's Resolution is Resolution 204. nairforceone.itch.io/resolution-2...

another robot highlight for 2025: man wearing humanoid mocap suit kicks himself in the balls

SCROOGE: You there, boy! What day is it? BOY: It's December 26th. SCROOGE: Oh shit. Oh fuck.

This night would be a lot more silent if you motherfuckers would stop singing about it!

Crosby, Stills, Nash & Jung

The Epstein Files aren't redacted, they just say Trump in tiny font over and over that it looks like solid black bars.

Chest or booty. Pick one!

Movie you’ve watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Stars (Wars nor Trek), LOTR, or Marvel, Disney Animated or Pixar.

Insert a movie into another movie: THE FAST & THE FURIOSA: TOKYO DRIFT

This is great, but it's also Sherlock Hemlock erasure.

Time to start my Advent Calendar Advent Calendar which contains 25 smaller Advent Calendars for me to open on each day this month.

[watching David Attenborough's introduction to Prehistoric Planet] ME: Excuse me, sir, but I believe your brother had a very similar idea that resulted in a very poor outcome. Would you care to comment on that?

Strong Floor, No Ceiling is what we're going to have when all of us are sleeping on the streets because of this administration's destructive economic and social policies. So... accurate?

President Trump pardoned the traditional Thanksgiving turkey today. Unfortunately, it was a Nazi Turkey named Joseph Gobbles.

My body is a machine that turns burritos into the power necessary to microwave more burritos.

"I didn't have THAT on my bingo card!" Yeah, that's not surprising. Bingo cards are usually random and not reflective of what you want or expect.

Oh no, what did the penny do?

What is this nonsense? Felix Lieter showed up in Casino Royale despite, in License to Kill having been eaten by a shark. Nobody cares. Just start again!

To celebrate 3.9k followers, I wanted to do something new: an #IndieBook #Share! 🪷 ◦ share this post for visibility ◦ Comment with your BOOK TITLE, BLURB (not snappy trope list!), and LINK FOR ACQUISITION ◦ if you have a COVER, add it with ALT text & artist/designer credit ◦ NO AI! ◦ share others!

Here's some unsolicited book promo for DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE - my #scifi #mystery #comedy novel about two friends who aren't detectives, but become detectives to figure out who's telling people they're detectives. Available wherever terrible books are sold! books2read.com/u/bOe0DE

Real wow for my real friends and shamwow for my sham friends.

Here's a real, non-AI Fabulously Weird Checklist. 1 point for everything you've done. 1. Wore your underwear backwards for a whole day 2. Ate a sticker(s) 3. Got emotionally invested in an argument you were having with yourself 4. Forgot the alphabet 5. Rocked a walkman like a rebel

What is this AI generated nonsense? "Rocked a walkman like a rebel?" What does that even mean? Why is any of this 'weird'? What is this supposed to be trying to make us feel?

THE THIING

[MICHAEL DUCKETT is wrestling an EVIL CLONE STEPHANIE DYER, and losing. The REAL STEPHANIE DYER stands nearby, frozen with a handgun aimed at the kerfuffle] REAL STEPHANIE: But which one do I shoot?! MICHAEL: Shoot the one that looks like YOU, you idiot!

If we're not still mad at itchio, my books are all available over there, too! nairforceone.itch.io

Only REAL writers would come up with a no-nonsense lady cop named Miranda Wright, and her loose-cannon partner Lauren Ardor.

No AI can accurately determine the presence of the unhinged chaos that lurks behind my seemingly mild-mannered visage.

I don't need this, my books are already unreadable, nonsensical bullshit.

Here's some unsolicited book promo for DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE - my #scifi #mystery #comedy novel about two friends who aren't detectives, but become detectives to figure out who's telling people they're detectives. Available wherever terrible books are sold! books2read.com/u/bOe0DE

I already pay high prices for expansions to Civilization, what's a little bit more, eh?

Going to bed, excited to see the absolute meltdown tantrum that's going to be waiting for us in the morning.