Took a nap at lunch time. Had to do so in the car today so I had to just idle the engine for warmth. At least this rental car, being a hybrid, has a "charge battery from engine" option so me needing to not die of hypothermia can also help take me places later on ❤️

Manager thinks I'm smartly dressed and actively floor walking because she is getting good feedback about me from all the users at this office (apparently). Nope. I'm sitting near the kitchen in jeans, trainers and a hoodie, giving all the users as much shit as humanly possible

Oh no. This hotels wifi says i can only connect 1 device. And has a login portal with a 32-charecter password Your rules do not apply to me. I shall connect my work phone, personal phone, work laptop, personal laptop, e-reader and 2 watches, thanks.

Workplace pensions can be a mess sometimes. My most recent job, I was there for 2 years. The pension program I was in there have given me 50% of my total pension pot to date, and the job i was with for 8 years...1% of my total pension pot.

When I have to reboot our router, it's always kind of satisfying. I get a low, satisfying "Bwong" from the UPS units transformer as it comes back on. Then sits there for a second doing self-tests and eventually comes up "Self-diagnostics complete. On Utility - Green"

Fucking not again

Just plugged my phone in. First thing that comes up. "Fast Charing. 5%. 1 minute until full" ... yeah I somehow doubt it's going to take 1 minute.

I just got a random text message from a number I don't know saying "You're a cunt" Which....Yeah. True. The way I see it, it's one of 3 things 1. A friend who has a new phone and doesn't know I don't have their new number 2. A wrong number 3. A scammer trying to make sure my number works.

You know you're watching an interesting video when one of the things that gets said is "Time to commit some felonies. I love the smell of going to prison in the morning"

String. Pins.

Fuck it. I'm going bowling.

I'm noticing a lot of people are deleting their absolutly horrible posts following the death of Charlie Kirk. Why is that? is it possibly because they realise that gloating about someone being assasinated is a really bad look?

Holy shit. Charlie Kirk has died? God damn. I hope they catch the bastard who killed him.

We gon' Die! #EmergencyAlert

Ladies and gentlemen, I have a further announcement to make 🧵 It is my great honor and pleasure to introduce to you; Blaze. He is a 9 year old Vauxhall Corsa that came to me with 50,000 miles on the clock.

I have a nextbase dashcam. They are great dashcams, but their app will constantly flood you with notifications even if you opt out of them. So now I block them at the operating system level because this is ridiculous

Ladies and gentlemen, I have an announcement to make. 🧵 Today, I was forced to say goodbye to a dear friend — Iggy. Before you worry: no, not a person or a pet. Iggy was my car.

We have the bowling alley to ourselves :D

Love it when a client's existing I.T. firm think they have secure passwords and they use shit like "LetMeIn!"

PSA for those of you who, like me, own an old car that you love, but is on borrowed time. Get yourself one of these jump starters. They will save you from having a pissed off day and they are stupid simple to use. Buy one that is WAY overkill for your car.

Yeaaaaaaaaah bitches

Fucking string pins pin-setters!!

I do not know how the fuck is am supposed to convert this split xD

Aaaah shit. This is the next course I have to do

Lol this first aid course's multiple choice questions lol. 2 of the options are basically "waterboard them" or "Choose violence" xD

Oh wow. £800 per day. That must be 100% legit and there's no way this is a scam

There is a dude doing pushups on the changing room floor of my gym. Whynthe changing room?? There is an entire gym just the other side of the wall! With a spot just for that

How Chat GPT surprised me the other night. a thread

So. While trying to make a cup of tea in the hotel, I plugged the kettle in, there was a bright flash and the plug managed to melt before the fuse, and now the socket doesn't work. Hotel staff made me a cup of tea and are here at 10:30pm replacing the socket. Great service <3

England in the summer. Yay.

I'm on a ship. The ship wifi said I can connect one device. So I did. My slate 7 which is VPNed to my router at home lol

And the bathroom door at port doesn't lock. Good job I have long legs, big feet and rubber-sole shoes

Getting on a ferry....so glad I got to port early. This is the queue 3 hours before departure. Its only going to get longer.

Walking into a bar in Leeds, one of the guys I'm with got stopped by the bouncer. Someone else said "Don't worry we all work in I.T. We're all virgins" xD wtf?!!

This month, I have used my unlimited membership to see a few pence shy of £150 worth of films. For £25 per month. Well worth it.

Me: I should text my dad and let him know [good thing that happened] Dad is currently in British Columbia Me: *Looks up the time in BC* .... it's 6am. maaaaaaybe I should wait a few hours lol

Dare I say it, but string-pin pinsetters aren't fucking up our game tonight...yet

The A&E department are playing some CD like "Now that's what I call 90s" over the PA system lol

Sitting in A&E at 3am. Dad fell over and banged his head. He seems okay but its a head & eye injury so I wasn't taking a chance

Manager: Allen, how easy is it to crack a password? Me: *produces a keyring full of memory sticks* about this easy Manager: how many of those tools are legal and in line with company policy? Me: don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to Manager: ... fair enough

Just spent 20 minutes looking for my chapter plan for the next chapter I want to write. I thought I hadn't written one. Turns out I had, I had just, for some reason, numbered it as "Chapter 91" rather than 19. Why? Because I'm a fucking idiot

This week, string-pin pinsetters didn't piss me off...because I went bowling at a place that doesn't fucking use them

I doubt this recent follower is who he says he is

about right for my life lol

On the bowling alley PA system tonight lol

Remember kids; string pins. Not even once.

Finally managed to create a passkey in my password manager for both my Google account and my twitter account. Man. What a faff! Everything else passkey-related just works but those 2 sites, you need to jump through 15 hoops!

Jesus fucking Christ lol. It's not even a dodgey website. It's the corporate perks website my company uses.

I'm sure bluesky and a fee media outlets will already be getting hard about this #x #xdown #twitter #twitterdown

*bright flash* Me: was that lighting? *KRACOOOOOOOW* Me: yes it was. Yay! I love thunderstorms