You can lie and lie for the orange man, but he will throw you away the moment you do something that makes him look even worse than he already is. Noem-sayin?

Late to the party, fashionably imo, but finally watching The Jinx

The following is an excerpt from the State of Chris Address I'm mentally and physically tired Thank you for your attention to this matter! CMB

Can’t stand the Tkachuk brothers, but my Minnesota Wild boys are having a great game. Goal by Boldy from Hughes and huge help on penalty kill by Faber. I’m ready for NHL to start again 😂

I have no fucks left to give so from now on whenever anyone asks me a question I don't care to answer I'm just gonna lean in, whisper FOLLOW THE MONEY, and walk away mysteriously.

I know there's a lot of shit going on, but in an interview today Barack Obama confirmed that aliens are real, but he hasn't seen them. Kind of big news from a trustworthy source.

Players … the floor is yours

This is real: NYC bar opens for people with "AI" partners, dining tables optimized to dine with your AI companion. jfc

I’ve watched the last minute of knight of the seven kingdoms ep 4 about 10 times today and got chills each time

Watching

y'all rested and got your snacks for USA vs Norway in curling at 3 am? you betcha it'll be a real banger dontcha know.

Did my big monthly shopping. Large packs of chicken drumsticks were on super sale and I grabbed about 10. A guy chased me down and said they had more if I wanted. No idea why but I said, nah we have enough for the party. Like this guy cares if it's all for me or not. (it is) 😂🤷‍♂️

Greenland sharks live to between 250-500 years and are pregnant between 8-18 years. Before you ask yourself why I posted this, I recently turned 50 so now I'm really into watching nature docs while eating Werther's candy.

I love Minneapolis 🥲

Me after waking up excited to get a new package and then finding out it’s “now arriving tomorrow”

So the NFL had a moment of silence for Kirk, but nothing today for the executions in MN. fucking unreal

This month's been so bad that I literally said out loud, "Oh, THIS is the bad place" to see if my wall would open up and Ted Danson walks in to tell me I'm right and he's just been fucking with us this whole time

I just hope I live long enough to see that dog murderer, plastic faced, grade A **** get her comeuppance. Oh, and the other thing too.

'The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command. George Orwell - 1984

I'm an hour away from the chaos, but have some great friends that live there. Watched the murder video from this morning and anyone who defends this can get f***** and die

With the wind tonight, temperature is dropping to -45° down here in the valley. We have an old saying around here when temps get like that Jesus Christ it’s fucking cold out

um I guess what I meant to say is my oven is broken so I use the device that makes my wings crispy and perfect pork chops

We're going back to the moon in first time in over 54 years: Not a big deal Some uk senior analyst preparing for financial crises about disclosure about aliens: no one curious Top News: There's a large heated debate in places that Bill Paxton's character in Twister was the villain

An exchange you might hear if you live near me “It’s -3° out, yah?” “Oh yah, but the sun is out so ..”

Doing some peaceful reading while outside it’s -8°, but with the wind it feels like -27° 🙃

OMG you guys, I've just been informed I've won the Blockbuster Video Peace Prize award for my work in avoiding people and watching a lot of movies.

What do kids even do for fun these days? I just know they look at their phone a lot. When I was younger sometimes we would bike to the biggest dirt hill, or snow hill in town, climb it, and try to throw each other off of it. Simple fun

She gave him the Nobel Peace Prize which she can't do. She can give him the medal, but that means nothing. Yep, just another day of being embarrassed that I live in this country

If season 4 of Traitors UK sticks the landing it'll be up there for one of my favorite seasons of all time

Thanks for all the nice birthday messages yesterday, I'd list all of you who did, but I'm 50 so I don't remember, or even know what platform I'm on ... wait who am I?

I have a threads account for the horror community. I posted this and the people there freaked out. saying really shitty things to me. I thought the chart thing would show I'm not serious. Plus, Noah Wyle has a history of not being the greatest guy at times. Deleting account.

I don't understand Noah Wyle winning over Adam Scott Noah: Plays a guy with the same expression of not wanting to be at his job. Looks at a chart every once in a while Adam: Has to play two different personalities, both very believable and complex in their own way

Rhea won! Fuck yes!

Large Marge died 52 years ago today. Worst accident I’ve ever seen 😭

Golden Globes tonight. Some of you know I love me some Helly R, but not a fan of the actress and her husband So go Rhea Seehorn. Let's bring home the hardware!

Normally patient but can it just happen already?

This season of Traitors UK is bonkers

So far 16 800 people have canceled their World Cup tickets. They don’t wanna come here. I don’t blame them

Orange fuck: I can’t think of anybody in history who should get the Nobel prize more than me

It’s early but as of now I’m Team Tara #TheTraitorsUS

Me after Rhea Seehorn finally won her first major award

Critics Choice Awards tonight Carol Sturka vs Helly R Choose your fighter

After having to go to Walmart, a war, and seeing grown adults literally crying over two FICTIONAL characters from Strangers Things not being intimate together, I am overstimulated and need a complete brain shutdown

*pretends to be shocked*

We just gonna sit here and pretend it was ok no one told me about the start of Traitors UK? 🙃😂

Me today after seeing my electric bill

Getting tired of finding a new show, really getting into the characters and story, and then the creators are all like, "cool, see you in three years for the next season"

Up early Xmas morning watching the first season of Better Call Saul. Not a bad way to start the holiday

An absolute legend