If you use grok to break the #peetoompledge AFFUUUHUUUK YOOOHUUUU

Don't use Tylenol you'll go to hell

The man mocked the death of rob reiner. You know what he's capable of

Look at this shit through this lense goddammit 🔎

Let's look at it through a lense

Im talking to a robot

Nine thousand o'clock am

Look at this square ass month FUCK you February

Oh hey, this was earlier in case anyone is interested

Time to pause!

Time to sit back and wait for no shoes to drop

Alright time to take my pill and settle in for another fret-free day at my job

I dont know what any of these movies or shows are. Publius? The Out There? Bug On Ya? One Battle? Brad Pitt? Bagland? Service? Can someone please tell me?

Gone ballsin

The people at the fire station are always outside bbq'ing on the gas grill they have out there. I've seen cops doing it too at their station sometimes. I dont think the paramedics who drive the ambulance get to do that

Im becoming bow legged. Need more calcium?

I can tell when someone is talking about something that I can ignore because it sounds like blahblahblahblahblah

Their talking abput stranger things on npr right now

I just. I just feel like if 4 or 5 specific people were 'incapacitated' this would all be over

Shout out to extraordinary events. you guys should follow extraordinary events.

Ah fuck theyre doing it

Hey just pretend I'm there

Eating the last square

Thats pretty cool

Will the buttery haze persist throughout 2026? What is it?

Peetoom is awesome

Retweeting a tweet that praises me

Oh hey the tree is down

What happens to Nabeebo in Avatar 3D?

This is just a taste of what 2026 has to offer

Lady, youre only slightly younger than me, which makes you a grown ass woman

Screaming at the Mormons at my door just full on AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

eating sugar snacks before bed

i forgot, i set my clock back like 3 hours for the new year i've gotta go to bed🥱

Ok ok fine my resolution is to stop saying "oopsy doopsy"

This is my impersonation of stranger things, "ouch! I got a nosebleed!"

facebook, "heres a profile pic WE think you'll like"

Battys: use bat door

This is the year scientists will discover farts is poop 🤯

Elbow asleep from leaning

Hey sailor you want an ai sloppy?

When i find out how 2029 goes I'll get back to you on how 2026 went

Groucho's mustache is mostly fake but thats just this crazy ai world we live in

The city is mine!

In Life In The Fast Lane, when he says "they took all the right pills" he's talking about ibuprofen and claritin D

Writing 2026 on everything

I could be happy the rest of my life with my aloof wife

Please dont feel badly