tonight i shall have... the frosted flakes

My mind is plastic

Its so fucked that i will never be as smart as my mom. She will always think of me as lesser

Shut up and drive drive drive🎵

poke at yourself all over to make sure you ain't got nothin weird goin on

Ok ok hear me out. Hanging from monkey bars to poop. You kinda pull up your ab muscles in while you do it tell me its not genius. Like squeezing a toothpaste tube

Anyway this is what we're still doing

Who will be the next to bare it all for the world to see

Omg can you imagine having a cordless vacuum? Omfg the freedom

If I couldn't slide around on a slick surface I would not be able to do my job

How come they dont want to make it easy to download videos?

Get up you lazy little shits! Lol jk thats not the vibe today

Is a woman going to give a peck on the cheek to her lesbian loverrrrr in this animated film? I dont know!

Hank Hill was right to kick dudes' asses. What are they gonna go to the cops and say look at these bruises on my ass?

Too hot to play. Not too hot to plop.

I took a picture

Its warm lol

Next door post: Just moved here five years ago. Anybody know where I can get a good blooming onion? We can meet at my place or yours

We shall see about hantavirus. We shall see

You dont know who buzz lightyear is??

you can just rub your stomach

What're ypu lookin at fuck-o

My youre looking healthy and expectant

Powdering my balls with highly enriched uranium dust

Tomorrow is monday baby!

Sounds suspiciously like starship syncopation music.youtube.com/watch?v=0ski...

Stop being so brolligerent

I talk to your coochie mr pop

I think Elon is his mom

They just came out with the perfectly air fryable wonton

You know I bet we can control the ufos. As in we, the people

Anybody noticed th bugs are out of control?

The lockpicking lawyer? Hes an ambulance chaser. And you better believe hes going to get into that ambulance

The secret to being able to do anything, literally anything, is drinking 2 gallons of water a day

Tom delonge "All The. Small Beings🎵"

Hey grok whats that goose eating

Not gonna sugar coat it. It is hottsy tottsy!

Clod which presidents jacked their shit in the oval office the most. And don't hallucinate Clod

Booty do you like the heat?

I just looked this place up, turns out theres som really cool prison complexes off highway 61 (like the Bob Dylan song)

Noooo dont heckle me im literally getting the attention I crave aha!

Place called Moose Lake i dunno

The hawk just swooped down way low right in front of me, giving me an amazing look at its dappled underside.

Sea shit diet

Need to make the trek to winco big time

Trump probably smoked a doobie with Joe Rogan on 4/20, and was like, “legalize it!”

It has to amalgamate bit by bit

Come here I have some potato for you

If a monkey steals your hat give it a gift to get it back its simple economics

Everybody be quieted!