I'm finally listening to Ashnikko's new album and It Girl has me fucking SOBBUNG because oh my fucking god spot fuckin on? Especially with the heavy SI that I don't wanna be past my next bday (I'm 27...)

New manager is realizing why so many staff in one section kwep quitting. Bc the timeframe they expect them to have things done, plus ppl coming in late, means that a LOT of them skipped their lunches. FREQUENTLY

🫠🫠 yeah so Im def NOT being over dramatic w some of this, one of the mamagers was just starting, was chattin (whispering) with another. I walked by, said hi, BC IM NOT A DICK, And the one just starting just looked at me and walked away, the other just went back to doing her job??? GROW TF UPPPPP

H p much bullied me into opening availability for inventory (she presses HARD, and I fawn response and Im TRYING to get out of that) Which is till like 4 am But Oh DARN would you look at that, my second job booked me overlapping shifts so I CANT work it (bc my manager there LOVES me and saved me)

So know how H sent me a thumbs up bc I didnt take the offered shift? It wasn't extra hrs like she said. It was her tryin to get rid of HER shift So I re added her to my private snap atory so she could see how I spent yesterday instead of being bullied into taking her shift (again)

Tryin sleep, scars ITCHY

I have a 50 hr work week next week 💀💀

Tmmr I work 8:30 to 2:30 at one job, then 3:30 to 8:30 at the other (w 30 mins walking time in that hr) 🫠😅

I keep starting to type to H and then have to remind myself that I need boundries w them, they are coworker not friend

Mom asked if we're still "just friends" and like ..... you juat got a handle on reffering to Ren as "them" (which yay! Mom's been self correcting herself!) I'M NOT about to dump FWB or poly info on y'all 💀💀

We did not do trail walkies, we started a side quest and got distracted 🤣🤣 went and got wok box after side quest errand, ate in the graveyard w joints, then went to a ceramic paint studio! DEF didnt intend to be out till almost 10 but here we are lmao

Walk goodies are ready for us

Hehehehe

May as well soak my feet while Im stuck here, since I did a chem peel a few days ago 🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️

I had a bunch of metamucil and its HITTIN

I have a mini doamin dot thingy Ima try that

What is IWTH me lately. Last night I had a whole melt down feelin GUILTY about thinkin about how I would do it 😭😭 geezus my mind is spirally into the dark lately

I need movment I need to move and distract and burn my muscles

I wanna excerise more its 3 am fuckin fuk fuck fuck

Weve talked about✨️ it✨️ before, but they v much want to take the lead bc I've never been eaten or like REALLY touched (I declined w gymbro bc nervous), and like I WANT them to take the lead, but like I have this fear it wont live up to what I have in my head. Not in them bein bad, but not likin me 💀

Btw, they drive 45 mins to come hang w me 👀

Only meant to do an hour. Am almost at 1hr and a half and its 2 am. Oops

Skipped yesterdays workout, so even tho its 130 am I gotta keep goin at it. Ill shower tmmr before I see them (wtf am I gonna WEAR?!)

Ive been very high res lately so excited to weigh tmmr morning

They drive, I plan the trails and bring the energy drinkies!

We're goin on a walky walky tmmr 😊😊

I need to hang with Ren, they're SUCH a safe friend 😭 I cant believe it took me 10 years of talking to finally get around to hanging w them

So I called out today, and H messaged me to ask if I wanted a shift tmmr (day off). I told her no, bc I still am not feelin the best. She sent me a thumbs up. Our messenger icon isnt set for that, she looked for and used an emoji. 🫠🫠 AND TRUST ME, IK WHAT IT MEANS W HER, SHE HATES THAT SHIT

Its ✨️raining✨️ and Im in my lil smoke shed 😊😊

Update, even tho I told him I was OUT, he didn't send it yet (somwtimes he waits a couple days for some reason 🫠🫠) Totally on me for not booking an appt sooner but thank FUCK my pharmacy is so helpful 😭 I will forever appreciate them sm, never wanna switch from them

Update, even tho I told him I was OUT, he didn't send it yet (somwtimes he waits a couple days for some reason 🫠🫠) Totally on me for not booking an appt sooner but thank FUCK my pharmacy is so helpful 😭 I will forever appreciate them sm, never wanna switch from them

My pysch appts are always so quick. Todays was 4 mins bc 1, he allows phone calls bc 2, I def have NOT told him a lot of things I should have and while I've gotten more reckless abt hiding it IRL (bc nobody rlly says anything LOL) I cant bring myself to tell him ANYTHING bc I dont actlly want help

I need to sleep bc my thoughts are SO NOTTTT IN A GOOD SPOT RNN?????

On top of that, I'm outta my Lamotrigine , I DO have a pysch appt tmmr so I friggin HOPE he and my pharmacy can have it sent and filled b4 tmmr night otherwise 😅😅 at least Im off thursday?

Excuse me while I cry 🥹🥹

Nope Im crying now

Also, one of the managers at my second job moved onto her actual field of work AND LEFT US ALL LITTLE THANK YOU CARDS AND WROTE OUT SUCH A SWEET MESSAGE I ACTUALLY HAD TO STEP OUTBACK TO TRY NOT TO CRY

Guess we smoke and smoke and smoke in the hopes weed will fix before bed 🫠🫠

Oh fuuuck how am I gonna take my meds

Im sittin in my shed in my pjs, no heater, no sweater and THE COLD IS SO NICE RN 😭😭

Got home, laid down for a minute, then bolted for the bathroom. Should've juat gone for the garbage. So humbling cleaning up your own .....bile? Not exactly vomit bc nothing TO vomit

My head has been POUNDING my whole shift 🫠🫠 I cant wait to go home and smoke omfg

Bless my mother for taking me in on her lunch break (shes working from home), bc otherwise I'd be in town at 6 am for a 4pm shift 🫠🫠 I DO feel bad, but she INSISTED so

45 mins into work out leggies are BURRRRNIN TODAY

pls RT we're on a quest for a new binder. PLS DROP RECS!! rn we have both M and S g¢²b, both of which smell after a very short time wearing them, and sometimes we have to wash multiple times for them to even smell neutral. the M is a bit big now but still usable, S almost too big (will be with gw)

Its 6pm, I'm gonna have some blueberries and strawberries solely bc I probably should eat SOMETHING