Is this 31 year old Menards bag worth more as artifact or fire starter

What is the highest number of turnovers in a football game

Best thing about no dog in the fight football is rooting for the underdog which can change every 5 minutes

A generous slug of Malort will wash the taste of defeat out of their mouths

I remember the Green Bay press gazette with a picture of a zero and 35 years ago in large print, mom telling me it wasn’t that long ago. 1989 just happened

Ok The Descendants is on got the Bounty roll and Fernet and coke

Just heard Rodgers start calling the play is it normal for it to sound the same after like twenty years

Took my daughters to Sephora tonight after picking them up for the holiday. Was sniffing various perfumes while they shopped and explained to a worker eyeing me up that I was there with my kids. 5 minutes later daughter told me a different worker asked if they knew me and were they OK.

What was first Dirk Diggler or Peter Dinklage

Kurl the CDC is blowed up we gotta hit the road think Canadia has walkers?

Ok I know it’s a toilet paper cartoon with bears but who inspected butts for Klingons

Let’s hold a pageant for who can rise to become a pimple on Mark Kelly’s rear end

I’ll spend my money on a swinging chick return around and make me sick and I got some money ‘til we fly I’m lazy and im white and I’m sick

Unrestrained boobage has real implications at NASCAR speeds

Everyone knows baby corn is just adult corn cut into small pieces

Felch/Falched/Fulched

Those horses whinnies were on point js.

From here on out it’s eggs Benidont

Never gonna be president

Along with no Christmas presents let’s bring back the peanut butter stuffed onion and traveling in empty boxcars

Seems like this should already be a thing. It’s not though but needs to be. It’s

Spanktown why haven’t I heard about that until Ken Burns told me

Sex and dwugs and wock and woll

If you told me there was this amazing essay about Simon & Garfunkel & a horse farm I *needed* to read, I'd--well, I wouldn't. But damn, this is it, by Cassidy Exner, latest in series of young writers approaching the Trumpocene slant rhyme. callingallsyllables.substack.com/p/eddie-wher...

Anyone else have their plane return to the gate to pick up another crew member?

Someone crop dusted the elevator rode up 17 floors guess I’m getting the NYC version of Northern Lights because I smell colors now

If there aren’t any googly eyes at the Gueggenheim I will be disappointed

Ich mache das die Blinden gehen und die Lamen wiedersehen viddividdividdivid boom boom boom boom viddividdivid boom boom

If I were a Target employee with plans to leave I would try to look like a Black Hole Sun character the last day

Having dinner at the restaurant attached to the hotel I’m deaf but wife is eavesdropping did you know techbros are assholes

He beat the wrap

Bumpy ride into LaGuardia but the taxi is scarier

If the ATC show up to work we will be arriving in nyc Thursday morning hoping traffic is better with all the fleeing billionaires going in the opposite direction

Ice water mansion are much more appealing when you are in front of a fireplace

Yabadabadoo

Just accidentally mixed gin with Diet Coke it made fruity pebbles

Republicans don’t need to know how to govern for the same reason the 9/11 hijackers didn’t need to know how to land.

The ship was the pride of the American side Next week don’t forget

O Canada

Whose idea was it to stop spaghettios with franks that was one of my favorite carcinogens

The real tragedy is #30 could’ve been an Olympic bowler

I don’t know about the rest of you I’m starting a Tylenol chelation clinic as soon as the check clears from selling my soul

I bet Herzog got the idea from watching dogs at the park

What was it that compelled Europe to band together to beat napoleon and is it around now

Waiting for the hard R to be uttered by an elected representative followed by a sigh of relief “gotta tell ya Katie it’s been a long time since I could express myself “

A new driver cuts off a motorcyclist and instead of getting angry the biker speaks to the lad and gives him encouragement. This is the way.

Probably best to chase it indefinitely