you should find out how many calories a gun is

had a dream where the latest culture war thing was over whether Rayman's junk is attached to his body or it floats like his hands and feet. Right-wing side argued it floated, left-wing side argued it was attached

[After Way of the Water] "Hey Quaritch, how did the hunt for Jake Sully go?" "..." "Did you lose a pitched battle against a stone age tribe and get all your men killed again?" "I lost a pitched battle against a stone age tribe and got all my men killed again. 😭" "God fucking damnit Miles."

this should be posted in reply to anytime someone uses AI art or asks a chatbot a question

there's about 15 of this kinda guy, all incredibly loud reactionary black centrists whose politics start and end with National Socialism with Anti-Palestinian Characteristics and since Harris lost they've become increasingly unhinged and racist to the point of total madness

this is what happened to chang-kai-shek when he went around burning villages for harboring suspected communists and all he did was create more communists

What do people love more than video games? That's right. Complaining about video games.

Heroes of Might and Magic III is a very peculiar game in that it's basically perfect, has not aged a day even a quarter of a century later, could be played for another thee quarters of a century without getting boring and every single story campaign is like jacking off with gympie-gympie leaves

i have found the one slav who has not played heroes of might and magic 3

you know a city is truly shitty when the wikipedia page for it has zero flattering photos of it from ground level

it's very funny how much the english/scottish rivalry is played up in history when every single actual battle between the two went down like this

so this bitch is definitely just sleeping with signal right

what you have to understand about the people that run bluesky is that they are silicon valley freaks and therefore also hang out in the same spaces and go to the same parties as right-wing media monsters like signal, spread over about 150 group chats that sometimes get leaked

at some point the DNC is going to have the purge the KHivers like all the prominent Brownshirts got purged and for largely the same reasons. violently feral online hooligans centered around a uncharismatic doof that clearly enjoys the attention but is a direct threat to the political project

these are the critters that taught you how to count on Rodney's Funscreen

Stuff like this are hints that Harris is far, far more online than she lets on and I have a sneaking suspicion she's a quiet twitter addict who often looks up herself so she can see her fanatical stans screaming at anyone that badmouths her

working on a new bit where i consistently talk about Kirby Marx and Human Marx as if they were the same person

they take your clothes when you get raptured but that's only so you get to, have to really, wear an exact copy of elvis's white rhinestone jumpsuit for all eternity

i got raptured and the only other people up here in Heaven are vladimir lenin, toussaint l'ouverture, a tibetan peasant boy who died in 1287, and the Yongle Emperor

when a woman democrat has some degree of power the traditional right-wing attack is that she slept around to get the position but here it's so incredibly obvious that she's just a spineless toady that accusing her of promotion-by-couch is less slanderous than how she's actually gotten ahead

guys who talk like this have political beliefs identical to Agusto Pinochet

when i hear the words white leftist i reach for my gun

every great empire towards the end of its life usually produces one final leader who genuinely tries to turn things around but one of a few things inevitably happens: 1.) they meet pushback and basically give up 2.) they get assassinated for pissing off the wrong people 3.) die at the worst moment

we are reaching smol bean apologia for powerful people rapidly approaching the scale of the angstrom. guys like this are funny because they're basically an inverted version of white southern democrats from the 60s where they believed the political party has a *specific* obligation to them

There is a cavernous maw the writer's instinct in me wants to fill; the theme of Sacred Murder and Castigation of Cowardice. You see so many writers just flinch like a spooked rabbit from the concept of Holy Retribution when there is nothing more human than the the need for revenge.

suddenly got inspired

Right-wingers: charlie kirk is in heaven now...a new angel...with new wings... 🥺 Charlie Kirk right now:

the femboy theory of ultraviolence completely vindicated

her scarf is also always blowing in the wind even indoors

working on my Infinite Strom Theory. Strom Thurmond never truly died, his soul just shattered upon his death and the fragments have been wandering around ever since looking for idpol hosts like scientology thetans

i like to think Marx (Kirby) and Marx (German) are the same guy

the difference between george wallace jr and people who talk like this can be measured in angstroms. you can kill the man but not the idea, if that man is strom thurmond apparently

all i ask of dem jucheists is that if they're gonna be middle-aged Red Guards could they at least dig up a few presidents and put their corpses on trial

what they don't tell you about Hell is it only has about 80% as many hot gay demons as Helluva Boss implies

this is like the third or fourth time in a row i've gotten a reply from an angry liberal and they clearly got so angry their brain melted into a Markov chain halfway through. It's always like "Oh yeah tough guy? Well have you considered your momma shucks whale backpacks in a Betty Boop pan?"

this doglike servility for a nearly 200 year old political party even more gentocratic than the CPSU during the Soviet Union's final years is something I could look at all day. I wanna seal it in epoxy resin and stare at it like I would an ancient extinct mosquito trapped in amber

I just died? Wow. I didn’t know that. I just — you’re telling me now for the first time. I led an amazing life. What else can you say? I was an amazing woman. Whether you agree or not, I was an amazing woman who led an amazing life. I’m actually saddened to hear that. I am saddened to hear that.

one of the cool things about being autistic is that people will just misread what you say in the most bafflingly insane ways. i can't even get mad at this because it's like i said i like candy and the reply was like "did you know the hippo is endemic to Africa?" speak and spells have more sentience

i'm cavemaxxing. banging rocks together. saying shit like 'ug' and 'oog'. i've discarded all my clothes in favor of a single tiger skin leotard that goes over one shoulder. i sold all my guns for a giant club

i want the future to be the skies in sonic adventure

[force ghost of Karl Marx that only I can see]: you should really loredump about your OCs more

Hologram of a very, very drunk Dr. Wily projecting from Zero's head crystal: hey zero did i ever tell yuo about tht time i went back in time and kidnaped megaman and reprogramed him to evil Zero: W...what? Dr. Wily: named him quint. gave him a pogostick Zero: ... Dr. Wily: painted him green

my haters keep depicting me as a gigantic octopus sitting atop the globe whose tentacles reach into every nation and institution

you failed to build a coalition to win an election. that's on you.