Off to Paris tomorrow for the weekend and have had my traditional pre Paris haircut.

My week near Carcassonne was absolutely superb. Local melons were at their absolute peak, the weather was hot, the pool was welcome.

Can’t believe that last night at Dua Lipa we got JAMIROQUAI as a guest but tonight they got CHARLI XCX.

Bluesky definitely the one I forget about (sorry).

How clean is your house icon Kim Woodburn, and Princess Diana, together in heaven, at last.

The military parade organised by the same people who did the wonka experience I see.

I simply cannot stop sweating.

A huge shout out to the woman at the Caravaggio exhibition who just ssshed everyone in a room that had gotten very noisy.

Rome is quite good isn’t it.

She’s cracked out her PSG shirt up in heaven.

A bloody lovely day in Margate.

I’m at the rising in elephant and there’s a guy here who was at the Porchester yesterday (and was clearly also a newbie)

My M&S T-shirt needs are proving difficult to fulfil.

Didn’t realise the Porchester was so expensive for the steam baths.

Remembering face swap

Just did an Instagram post where I accidentally included two photos of soup.

HEJ

Just saw Jamie Demetriou of Stath Lets Flats fame on the Elizabeth Line.

A delightful evening in SE1.

New specs, new sunglasses.

My first thought was: imagine if you’d been part way through the meal of your life at Extabarri when the power went.

Really enjoyed the brief moment when everyone on holiday in Spain’s couldn’t post anything it on the internet.

Well done to @icod.bsky.social on the Canadian election result.

Due to a logistical cock up, I need to get my haircut by someone other than my longstanding barber for the first time in at least 10 years and I just don’t know where to go and what to do.

Just off to pick up some Loewe tea.

I propose that we just get rid of public toilets.

The Pope, up in heaven, with Princess Diana and Paddington.

The pope, and Princess Diana, together in heaven, at last.

We must be days away from finding out what the new M&S summer food range is going to be like.

He is fucking well risen.

Winchester Cathedral is worth a visit.

Hello from Winchester.

I need a hotel for one night in Rome and a hotel for three nights in Madrid and let me tell you it’s a bit tricky trying to find something I actually want to stay in.

I’d actually say you’re probably too late to get the one you really want today.

Thinking about the memes a funeral directors would post on their twitter and Facebook pages.

I think I want a kilt.

I love the Glaswegian commitment to karaoke.

I need absolute no more Cunts Went To Space content

I am very happy to be in Glasgow for the next couple of nights.

Just seen a Sainsbury’s for the first time in two weeks.

Hello from Perth. I was last here in 1981 where I stayed at a hotel then called the city mills hotel but is now a Mercure.

A very delicious evening at the malt room in Inverness

Just been to the most northerly M&S in the world.

Guys, Inverness is quite pleasant.

HELLO FROM INVERNESS!!

Hello from the actual mainland, and the home of Hamish Macbeth.

It’s raining on Skye! It’s over!

For those who’ve been enjoying my Skye content, it’s my last night on Skye. For those who haven’t been enjoying it, it’s my last night on Skye.

If there’s one thing I’m going to get my money’s worth in a hotel it’s any kind of spa.