The absurdity of our lives is that the completely impossible somehow becomes more completely impossible.

Wendy Carlos came out as trans in 1979 and NO ONE GAVE A SHIT. More evidence the "culture wars" are a manufactured distraction by the ruling class so they can continue to line their pockets by having the government serve corporate interests over the working class.

NEW BUSINESS IDEA: a sports drink powder with vitamins and electrolytes that you can add to water for MAXIMUM PERFORMANCE, but we're going to add dry milk powder. 🍼🍼 [MILKADE] 🍼🍼 We'll be the first in the SPORTS DAIRY market and have first-mover advantage. Who's ready to invest?

The word "robot" comes from Czech robotnik "forced worker," from robota "forced labor, compulsory service, drudgery."

A myth of capitalism a superior product or service will always win. Unfeterred or laissez-faire capitalism often leads to monopolies, near-monopolies, and cartels which stifle innovation and prevent companies which provide superior goods or services from being successful.

Dragonball pretty much throws logic out the window if it means something cool can happen. Dragonball "logic": shooting myself in the face with a shotgun might kill me, so everyday I trained really hard by shooting myself in the face with a shotgun. I'm now immune to shotgun blasts to the face.

Everyone has put too-hot food in their mouth, but there must necessarily have been an incident where someone put the absolute hottest food into their mouth.

Two. Tier. Economy. Two. Tier. Society. I've been saying it for a while and I will keep saying it.

Cheese can come in cubes, but I believe cheese technology can go further. Introducing "Cheese Tetrahedra."

Night on Bald Mountain Dew.

I saw DJ Shadow in a giant sphere one time. And now no shows ever again.

The "Don't let your disability define you" crowd is obnoxious. It's rarely people who actually have disabilities, and more often people with more manageable life problems, or even more tragically the care-takers, which comes off as "don't let your disability negatively effect me too much."

Pretty sure if I keep saying, "For me, Satanism is just engaging in Socratic dialogue with Christians," I will be forced to drink hemlock.

It can take infinite power to do nothing in an arbitrary simulation.

An "Air Bud" movie where he saves Polish-Jewish refugees by employing them in his factories during World War II.

An "Air Bud" where he's a meteorologist and predicts a "storm of the century" but only his handler believes him. It eventually turns out to be true and hundreds of thousands of people are displaced with thousands of avoidable deaths.

Fucking parenthetical got me so sidetracked I can't even form a coherent thought. The state of my brain.

It's very hard to have more Jesus per sentence than 1. Unless you fucking HATE pronouns and want everyone to know it

Riding the fine line that my behavior is not obsessiveness, but is technically ADHD hyper focus. It doesn't cause me any distress neither when I am engaged nor disengaged. Closer to the sun we yet fly.

EVERYONE KNOWS THE BEST PLACE TO MAKE SURE THE GOVERNMENT IS WORKING AS INTENDED IS ON FACEBOOK MESSENGER. FACEBOOK MESSENGER IS AN INDISPENSABLE PART OF OUR DEMOCRACY.

A common closure is "I pray in your name, AMEN". Which, I guess TECHNICALLY means the prayer isn't explicitly Christian, but who is "YOUR" in this context? This is why we need to GET RID OF PRONOUNS.

All hail our glorious leader, the king of the philosophical "shit post," Slavoj Žižek. Most of his points are completely incomprehensible, but when he's salient, I agree with him. But you can see anything when looking at a Rorschach test, and perhaps this is simply the linguistic equivalent of it.

In the beginning, there was one man, ATHOR, KING OF THE ATHEISTS. And he proclaimed "DON'T BELIEVE IN ME," and we didn't. The end.

My spouse says she would be SHOCKED if my first researched political science paper I made with no formal degree in any social science were accepted into an Oxford Journal. Absolutely heart broken that she doesn't believe in me.

I've been told "reading comprehension" is my superpower, which I like a lot, because the alternative is "letting something completely hijack my brain so that I can't perform basic life functions" is my superpower, which I like a lot less.

I have a recurring nightmare that one of my children pierce a lithium ion battery and we need to make a trip to the ER.

Dividing ethnicities up by fractions and blood quotas is some colonizer shit. As if there is ever any practical purpose in the practice other than human rights violations.

You're not a "free speech advocate" if the only sort of speech you permit around you confirms your beliefs. You're just a grifter.

It's just crazy that 2,000 years ago, Cicero basically figured out the basis of a just society, articulated in an incredibly easy-to-understand manner. Kant's "Critique of Pure Reason" could be titled "More Reasons Cicero was Right" and be considered a reasonable title.

The wrong Amazon is burning. The wrong ICE is melting (Stolen from a stranger.)

Smoking lowers your chances of being killed by a Zamboni. Because you'll be dead from the habit first

SHELL SHOCK post traumatic stress disorder

There's some mathematical argument where we're essentially guaranteed to be 9th cousins unless there was a significant amount of incest going on

Yeah... If you look at your family tree long enough, it's less "will I find incest" and more "how bad is the incest going to be" and "how far removed from it am I"

I think alcoholism and abuse just did its toll on my family tree Can't have a hundred years of alcoholism and expect there to be family unity unless there's some strong counterbalancing force (religion probably?)

How much of a nerd are you? Watching Halt and Catch Fire and a person connects to the Internet and it plays the "dial up modem sound" and I immediately say "that's not what a modem sounded like in the 80s. That's a 90s modem which didn't exist yet"

My parents always said I would get "more religious" as i aged and they got their "Monkey's Paw" wish. Hail Satan!

The "problem" is I have a background in philosophy, history, and just general critical thinking skills that doesn't slot nicely into the narrative of "the threat of a Christian theocracy is the only thing that matters"

Remember when the FBI tried to convince Martin Luther King Jr to kill himself by threatening to release information regarding his marital infidelity? Pepperidge Farm remembers

It's not the CIA's job to crackdown on pedophiles, and they've shown they are 100% fine with letting atrocious stuff happen if it means the US's global imperialism can be strengthened

We are absolutely, 100% failing as a society in how we're discussing Epstein. Do we all just collectively think that this was the only abuser who is relevant? Where are the calls to crackdown on the pedophilic elite? Even if there's someone out there half as bad as Epstein, it's a fucking tragedy.

Can we start actually arresting some of the people implicated in the Epstein files? We hunted Snowden like a fucking dog, we're happy to let ICE terrorize innocent people, but we can't arrest a dozen people to bring some sort of profound justice to this? Why are we delaying?

The men are brave and not afraid of the crab.

If Trump signed an executive order tomorrow giving Apple CEO Tim Cook limited authority to issue drone strikes, do you think Congress would stop him?

The meteor that killed the dinosaurs was so energetic that ejecta hit escape velocity and were shot out of orbit. It is theoretically possible that bits of dinosaur are on the moon.

Real men don't backup their data. If your hard drive crashes, that's clearly god's will and you just need to accept that.

If Cookie Clicker is "Numbers Go Up," Vampire Survivors is "Numbers Go Up: Psychedelic Visualizer"

Olympic swimmers shave their body to reduce drag and optimize their performance. I trim my nails so they don't get caught on clothes while I am doing laundry. We are the same.

I could never be a schoolteacher. "And children, always remember: Fuck the Police and Hail Satan."

ICE is being assisted by armed officers with "CONSERVATION OFFICER" blazoned on their chest. We're at the point where game wardens are upholding the status quo of para-military operations against the public. Will animal control be next to don armored plate and wield batons? When does it end?