The pressure is obviously getting to JD Vance. Maybe he should go fuck a couch or something.

“Nothing bad can happen. It can only good happen.”

@mitchmelnick.bsky.social @jonstill.bsky.social CityTV had Kimmel last night.

"Oh. What's this strange sensation in my chest?" "I think your heart's beating again."

Why Calgary? www.sportsnet.ca/nhl/article/...

This Nazi is also a couch fucker. It’s true, you know.

Jimmy Kimmel’s monologue has been up on YouTube for 45 minutes and it’s approaching 700K views. I wonder what that number will be by tomorrow morning.

As I was saying…

Full monologue if anyone is interested.

The last 30 minutes of Jimmy Kimmel Live will be a part of a documentary someday.

OMG. Robert De Niro as Brendan Carr.

I’m embarrassed by how delighted I am about how much this will cause MAGA to lose its collective brain cell

Now he’s got Robert DeNiro on playing Carr. 🤣

Fucking right Jimmy!

Kimmel: "He might have to release the Epstein files to distract us from this now."

Kimmel: Brendan Carr is the most embarrassing Carr the Republican have embraced since the cybertruck

Kimmel: "This show is not important. What is important is that we get to live in a country that allows us to have a show like this."

Kimmel comes out of the gate with a Tylenol joke

Kimmel making fun of Fox hypocrites right off the bat 😂

Alien: Earth season 1. 10/10. Masterpiece!

Goddammit, I’m so fucking tired of this guy. One of the most fragile, negative fucks in history.

Yanks 1 GB of the Jays for first in the AL East. Shit.

Anyone with Bell Fibe 4K tv: I just discovered they have the Oilers vs Jets on TSN4K channel 1399. It’s supposed to be blacked out but it’s not.

2 en 2 pour les Canadiens lors des matchs préparatoires! 🔵⚪🔴 Tes impressions sur le match? 👀

No shootout tonight!!!

Arber goal!!

Power play coming up #Habs

Is there a whinier, more fragile bitch in the world?

Clear missed trip there. Refs suck.

Jays are down 4-1. Damn.

Man, Lane Hutson is so good.

Nice shot, Suzuki!

Slaf got his cheek cut with the skate. That could have been much worse.

Fuck you, MLB.

Woah! The Jays are getting fucked by these umps!

I think Joe Veleno will end up being a decent addition to this team.

Preseason legend Auston Matthews. 🥇

Top line is looking really good tonight!

#Habs Lane Hutson to Cole Caufield for one-timer goal vs #Flyers Assists: Hutson, Suzuki #GoHabsGo #NHL #Hockey @RocketSports.bsky.social

The first GOAL Caufield of the season! #GoHabsGo

Go Habs Go. (You’re probably going to see my Jays posts at the same time.)

Nic Deslauriers in the Flyers lineup tonight. Do we see Nic vs Arber tonight? #GoHabsGo

A statue of Donald Trump & Jeffrey Epstein has been placed outside the White House in honor of Friendship Month

Florian & Arber Xhekaj are in the building.

His brain is mush. Stop this madness.

I need a tylenol.

Wow. TD Lions. That’s the ball game.

Pretty good NFL game going on tonight!