Hey, if even Chuck Norris can kick the bucket... there's hope for Schmuck POTUS...

Everything is simple when you’re a moron #ForrestTrump

From Miracle on Ice to Miracle With ICE... (They just have to ruin everything...)

When real life creates scenes that are dumber than anything you could prompt AI to create...

Guess we won't be getting those 'Tariff Rebate Checks' we were never gonna get anyway. #shartofthedeal

Who knew the only way to get Republicans to call for gun control...was for Liberals/Progressives to start owning guns? If Liberals/Progressives all start becoming 'pro-life' will we get abortion back too?

Man, it's getting to be too much. Lots of people spewing nonsense -- lots of arguing and fighting back. I could really just use some alone time away from anyone. Which is why I bought tickets to every showing of MELANIA today. Alone at last!

I'm getting a little sick of people saying ICE officers are NOT TRAINED. Not true. Here is a photo of them training. So there--

I love living in a country where the guy in charge announces 'Board of Peace' and 'Bored of Peace' on the same day. We are living in special times. Maybe we'll even survive them.

I think it's ironic that the guy trying to distract & distance himself from being on an island -- is going full-tilt trying to forcibly take an island.

We've gone full circle... My wonderful downstairs neighbors have had enough of the racism, fascism and Nazi-like behavior of the US government -- so they are relocating to Germany where it's safer.

If you "stop" 8 wars...and then start 6... Do you now have to say you only "stopped" two wars? Or, do you still get to say '8'? If only one side is fighting, does it count as a "war?" What does the FIFA rule book say about this? Help, I'm confused. #NotAmericaFirst

Has ICE deported Maduro yet? What's going on, I thought we didn't want people coming to this country illegally??

"If for any reason that the FIFA World Peace Prize winner cannot fulfill his/her duties, the 1st runner up shall take over" Do we know who was #2?

Maybe I shop in the wrong store -- but invading Venezuela didn't make my groceries any cheaper... So much for 'America First!'

So now Venezuela is the 51st State?

My favorite scene from the new MELANIA movie is when Trump and Melania choose the extra gold Holy Grail (of course they would) and are smited by the Lord. (Unfortunately, Satan later resurrects them & so now they are beholden to him.)

Dammit, this happens every time. I just sent out 1000, expensive, handwritten, 'Apology Cards' for being white -- and now I'm told I don't have to apologize. Unbelievable the timing on this! Also, JD Vance is a racist piece of shit

Just looked at the Epstein Files. I thought they hated DEI and Affirmative Action

Is it any surprise that the modern day Archie Bunker would still be going after 'Meathead' Seriously, go to Hell, Trump RIP Rob & Michelle Reiner

The problem isn’t that he keeps falling asleep on the job – – the problem is he keeps waking up

Trump replacing Juneteenth and MLK Day with his birthday as a national holiday / free national parks day. We shall call it - BUFFOONTEENTH

With this newest pardon, should I be buying stock in Cocaine? Is there about to be a bump?

Juan Orlando Hernández, a former president of Honduras who had been convicted in the United States of drug trafficking charges -- has just been pardoned by Trump. Got it. So, it's not so much the drug trafficking that Trump & Hegseth are against... It's the boats!

I'm reading reports of MAGA "finally" starting to realize Trump is a bullshitter & a conman Mmm-hmm I hope so. But I'm not fully convinced yet. "I dunno, I bought 738 bottles of Trump Snake Oil & I'm still bald, my eyesight still sucks & muh dick's still tiny... I must not be using it right"

Who gets smarmy Newsmax creep Brian Glenn in the MTG - Trump divorce?

‪And just when I thought my easy-listening band, 'Quiet Piggy' was about to take off...

I think it's awesome that Clay Higgins took a principled stand against Trump's wish to release the Epstein files. It's about time Republicans stood up to Trump and voted their heart instead of just falling in line. Also, he wants to protect pedophiles & the people who love them.

DEMOCRATS: So, it's like this-- We realized the GOP (who we just whupped less than a week ago) was never gonna give in to our demands & have no problem not working; starving people; not paying military; canceling flights & ruining Thanksgiving -- so we decided to give in so they can ruin healthcare.

If you're a billionaire, than yes, America is very affordable. People aren't looking at it from all angles.

Question for the cult. If your guy caused: Tariffs hurting consumers/small businesses Screwed over Farmers Horrible job market Inflation/costs rising despite the lying Abusive ICE attacks on non-criminals/citizens Gov shutdown People going hungry How can you say you're Making America Great Again?

I don't think my local grocery store got the memo that prices are lower.

I know there are a lot of people considering or actively moving out of New York City now that Mamdami has won. I hear your concerns. I feel your pain. And I appreciate the extra street parking.

Oh no, MAGA is so upset that NYC will be run by a COMMUNIST!!! (Unlike Dear Leader -- who is definitely NOT a Russian asset, Pro-Putin puppet, funded by oligarchs, aided by Russian bots/trolls, who's midtown tower isn't full of Russian spies & who didn't need Russia's help to win in 2016/24)

What an amazing negotiating strategy -- nobody ever thought to do! 1. Take deal that's working fine 2. Destroy it via tariffs for reasons that only make sense to you 3. Other side retaliates, hurting you more 4. Run to them upset 5. Restore original deal but concede more to them 6. Crow about "win"

Yes, release the Epstein Files... But also, release Trump's Cognitive Exam. Let us all marvel at the perfectness of his score. Let us bask in awe at how beautifully he answered such hard questions. Is it too much to ask that we simple subjects get to see the mind of our stable genius King at work?

BREAKING: Trump to sue makers of Adderall for causing small penises.

What is the name of the medical condition that would cause you to take medical advice from Donald Trump and/or RFK Jr.?

At least we know Trump won't be showing up at the World Series. It's Los Angeles vs Canada... he doesn't know which to hate more. But also -- he's in the Epstein Files.

If only the NBA basketball players and coaches involved in the gambling scheme had cut Trump in on their winnings... They'd all be pardoned already.

Let's go on record & say NO DEMOCRATIC President (or other REPUBLICAN President) would demolish the WHITE HOUSE to build a 'look at me' ballroom during a time of: Government SHUTDOWN WEAK jobs numbers CUTS to healthcare FURLOUGHS Loss of BENEFITS Chaos & UNCERTAINTY MAGA he doesn't care about you!

Dear farmers, please check off the following things that harm your business. Trans Gays rights Black History Tariffs on imports Trade wars w/ China Deportation of workers Sensible gun laws Medicare Bailing out Argentina Destroying soybean market DEI Liberals Trump 🤔 Still proud of your vote? 🤷

If Mitch McConnell is just going to keep falling down, there is no way he belongs anywhere near a Government Building! He belongs near a subway... but really, any train station will do.

When Trump & MAGA say "America First!" -- do they mean America is the first country they're going to attack? Or, that America will be the first country to bomb multiple countries this year?

The guy who changed the Department of Defense to the Department of War is upset he didn't get a Peace Prize. We live in dumb times.

There have been 11 Gov't shutdowns since 1976 (when current budget process was established) Trump was President for 3 (27%) Trump was President for longest shutdown (35 days) Donald Trump tweeted 'shutdowns are the fault of the President' (before he was Pres.) Trump couldn't keep a casino open

Public Service Announcement: Donald J Trump doesn’t fire people because they’re incompetent. He fires people because they know he’s incompetent. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

As much as I'd never want to subject anyone to more of this ignorant fool... I do think it's important to take in Trump's entire speech to the military. This is Biden's debate performance on Tylenol. This man isn't cognitively declining. He's cooked. Done. Gone. www.youtube.com/watch?v=bv0j...

I keep getting alerts the government is shutting down. Does that mean it was still open? Isn’t this what they want? Haven’t they been dismantling & firing & downsizing & contracting this whole time? Have none of them read project 2025? They ran on this shit — now they’re pointing fingers?!?

Fatton