tfw things are going so awesome

Need my hospital to be like 40% less enthusiastic about my upcoming colonoscopy.

“All of these sources support mass deportation” what did y’all think mass deportation meant? vibes? papers? essays? losers.

It is genuinely insane to watch capital decide that allowing this shit to go on is better for them than having to allow the FTC to do mild monopoly investigations and require cancellation buttons on websites.

“A domestic terrorist” who “tried to assassinate federal law enforcement.” They will murder you in the street and say you were aiming to kill them all as justification.

The thing about Our Current Misfortunes is this was all deeply predictable from the moment that man rode down that escalator and brought Hell with him in 2015 but those of us who were clear-eyed about it were treated like we were lunatics.

Shapiro and Newsom are both off-putting in a way that is immediately obvious to any primary voter but not necessarily the people in their orbits. I think a lot of the analysis about their odds of running (and winning) are considering them in a vacuum, not as who they are as people.

Nate lives in a world of abstracts where “Trump threatens Greenland with military force” can be switched out for any random assortment of words and treating them like they have any bearing on reality is unforgivably dweeby.

A visceral reminder of the passage of time and that the sun is young once only.

Difference between Democrats and Republicans is when a Democratic president gave a fuckass bonkers speech demonstrating immediate unfitness for office the party worked to replace him immediately.

These people are unnaturally obsessed with trans people it is fucking creepy.

That’s what has been mind boggling to me. If you are a Congressional Republican (God help you), even if you have I ❤️ DJT tattooed across your chest, you know that there will be a day—relatively soon!—when he will no longer be president but you will still be running for reelection.

That was what was remarkable about the first Trump term—which feels quaint by comparison now, though I know there were Horrors. Up until Covid, every catastrophe was of Trump’s own volition.

Jake Tapper you are very annoying but in this singular instance your republic needs you.

I love watching people still on Twitter gas themselves up over the idea that some kind mealy-mouthed libertarian-adjacent messaging is going to Save The Democratic Party™

There’s a lot of tension between consumers who are tired of websites being mostly unusable because of twenty ads loading on any given page and the people who run those websites trying to figure out how to monetize them and I don’t necessarily think “more ads” is the solution.

Rich cultural text that Will Stancil is in the streets of Minneapolis fighting ICE while the ten thousand losers who want him to dead are petrified of No Kings events because they might see a mom with a cell phone. Just a perfect distillation of every discourse.

A good reminder that SOME cartoonists from the ‘90s remain unproblematic and wisely offline.

One thing about our new and grim present catastrophe is that a lot of our primary antagonists hate being made fun of.

Whoever invented task and activity codes for legal billing is not seeing heaven.

Don’t forget that all the agonies we’re suffering are worth it because Joe Biden didn’t grant them interviews and Donald Trump does.

True a woman was shot in the face three times by a federal agent but isn’t the real crime the use of profanity? Jake Tapper in this 16-part series on Democrats’ use of coarse language.

Think it’s so cool & chill that we’ve sent a bunch of heavily armed trigger happy bingbongs throughout the United States who can apparently be goaded into murdering all of us if we’re a touch impolite to them.

“We had whistles. They had guns.”

The moment for anger about this is much much later but I remain furious with Joe Biden for twiddling his thumbs and letting Trump regain power.

Never forget how much they hate us and let that inform how we interact with them.

I am so sick of the dead bodies that pile up in every direction when Republicans are in control.

Do you know how long I have been waiting for a Democrat, any Democrat, to respond to the Trump Administration with actual anger and outrage.

Fucking NAZIS.

More like Tony Dorkoupil.

Imagine if a Democrat ran for office on a platform of “I’m going to make those dumbass Republicans pay” and then cut off federal funding to Texas and Florida.

I am deeply uninterested in thoughtful profiles of the foot soldiers behind the most disturbing day in America in almost 20 years.

Jared Polis is a psyop designed to make me specifically insane.

Crazy how I’m almost 40 and every Republican president in my lifetime has been involved in some dumbass international regime change that shocks the conscience.

Yeah but remember Kamala was for they/them so really this was the only logical tradeoff.

Weird morning to sleep in.

CBS News is making interesting choices because the “liberal media” shtick is so baked in that the people who would be excited by all these changes CBS is making won’t be watching them anyway and the people who were watching are going to be pissed off and go elsewhere.

This is our year. We can never forget this tiger.

I said I would write more this year and then I almost did but then the right arrow key broke and it became an obsession of mine and I never fixed it bc I didn’t want to go all the way to Georgetown to get my keyboard fixed and I think the lesson here is I am often a victim of learned helplessness.

It’s especially galling in light of the Supreme Court saying, well, the only accountability for a president is impeachment. The official Democratic Party response is shrugging about it and going “well what can you do.”

The thing about this is that no reasonable international partner is going to say “Well this was a special exception, the United States is a reliable ally.” You can’t predicate international stability on how 30,000 white people in Michigan, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin will vote every four years.

“Just need to give this lil guy a quick washeroo,” I heard myself saying tonight while doing dishes. We all become strangers to ourselves.

Would like to thank my health insurance provider for sending me two emails and two text messages about an important message in my inbox and requiring multi-factor authentication for a “merry christmas :3” message

hbd jesus.

Spilled half a bucket of popcorn at the 3:15 PM Tuesday afternoon showing of HAMNET the way God intended.

The de facto heckler’s veto conservative students get in academic spaces is bonkers.

What’s doubly funny is everything about this is leaking which means nobody at CBS right now respects Bari Weiss and frankly that’s what she deserves.

I wonder how Caitlin and her husband feel now.

Everything about this discourse is annoying because that kind of poll-tested leading from behind is immediately detected by most voters and they hate it.

My 70+ year old parents complained nonstop about slow restaurant service and nobody working at the gas stations and I said “Well yeah they all got better jobs” and they were beyond frustrated that that would happen.