This is how you look when you try to justify Pretti and Good's murders.

He's the least healthy US president. And forty-two US presidents are dead.

STOP FUNDING THE ICE-HOLES!

Ain't it great how the MAGAt position is that we need to give ICE more money than most of the world's militaries in order to save a buck fifty on social services?

Hey there, Mister Speaker There is egg upon your face A goose egg with a goosestep For a ghoulish master-race If you embrace his hatred then You're sure to end up lonely There's egg upon your face, and yes, It's clearly egg-whites-only 1/3

With thanks to the Simpsons.

...I think I know enough of hate To know that for destruction ICE is also great And would suffice

😳😳😳😳

As you already well know by now, it's all lies. Every single thing anyone in this entire administration says is a lie. All of it. Every time.

Stop trying to impress us by making cakes look like something that isn't a cake. You're pretty much just a frosting sculpter. Do something hard; make a pizza look like a cat or somesuch.

They're not just cowards; they're cowardice.

"So, how did you get your peace prize?" "Oh, this old thing? I invaded and occupied the country of the actual winner. So..." #pedophileprotector

Has anyone called them this yet? If not, I'm putting my stamp on it. #FuckICE

“We wouldn’t bother to show up for our purported principles, so you shouldn’t, either!”

They want a violent uprising. You know what we should do instead? Go DOGE on their asses; swarm their buildings in numbers too big to ignore. Shut everything down. Walk away like you own the place. If it worked for a few stooges with no resumes, it'll work for a million strong Americans.

The threads about Gorman's tribute to Good are peppered with MAGAts saying "Now do Kirk" or "Where's the poem for Ashli?" They wouldn't have to say things like that if their cult could attract a single person with talent.

Why do they wear camouflage?

This is exactly what I told someone yesterday. Even if I spot you the first shot (I shouldn’t, but let’s go with that), shots 2 and 3 were inexcusable and this officer will lose his case if it ever goes to court.

Whenever a distraction arises, just turn it into a prefix for the Epstein files: Release the War-Crimes-threatening-Greenland-ICE-murdered-a-woman-in-cold-blood-trying-to-cancel-elections-rotting-from-the-inside-destroyed-the-East-Wing-Epstein files!

Why does Donald's cult keep saying "our hemisphere" lately, as if that means "our neighborhood"? A hemisphere is half of the entire globe, and since you're in two of them, literally three quarters of the world is in your hemisphere. It's not a tiny, local area you have authority over.

People who live in White Houses shouldn't throw ketchup.

The Republican Party seems to consist largely of rich people who barely do anything telling the rest of us that they need to keep us absolute desperate to be sure we'll keep working.

The Epstein Files are all like...

The ring of Wrath is chilling out And Greed is losing power The ring of Lust is cleaning up With the very coldest shower And all because of Donald's goons Who simply can't play nice The damned are freezing over now Cuz Hell is full of ICE 1/3

The Epstein files have so much black that I'm surprised Texas isn't scrambling to redistrict them.

If I were the Ghost of Christmas Future right now, I'd absolutely set up a clip for Donald where he sees his own name added to JFK's gravestone.

If they're always telling us that billionaires will move away if we tax them, why do they also get to pretend that these same billionares are patriots?

So, there's an online form where you can send Texas officials pictures of strangers in public restrooms. Everyone try very, very hard to not abuse this.

POV: You're Donald Trump, telling the nation about how much you've reduced the price of pharmaceuticals. #iykyk

Remember, everyone: You can leave your questions and comments for the Heritage Foundation here: www.heritage.org/contact

Looks like somebody is disappointed that when you spread conspiracy theories from a seat of power, people wonder why you're not proving your point. www.cnn.com/politics/liv...

We go now to a live feed of Mike Johnson addressing the House Republicans:

What's the best nickname for Hegseth? Is it... 1. Kegsbreath 2. Hagueseth, or 3. Tonic the Heg-hog?

The Epstein files are gonna be all like, "REDACTED was then heard saying to REDACTED, 'Jeffrey, if this doesn't get your motor running, my name isn't Donald J Trump!'"

It looks like the trolls took a cue from Donald today and stopped crying their Crocodile Alcatearz over political violence.

It’s easy to see why Elon has such high regard for AI; Grok is the only entity in his organization that periodically makes sense.

What are the odd-makers giving on FIFA not having a *second* annual Peace Prize?

“Okay, we’ll give him the made-up award, but only if I don’t have to touch him.” “Won’t it look pathetic for him to put it on himself?” “I will grovel, but I WON’T TOUCH HIM!”

I’m pleased to announce that I have won my own personal Peace Prize, as well as my own Stanley Cup, master’s degree in engineering, and Iron Chef award. I’m giving Best Sound Design to the troops, though, because they deserve our respect.

FIFAFO.

The whole AI boom would come to a very quick end if everyone started pointing out that the easiest jobs for it to eliminate should be in finance.

White supremecists like to put up pictures of Audrey Hepbern and say "I challenge you to name a more beautiful actress" as if they're making some sort of point. Lupitia Nyongo makes Hepburn look like Minnie Mouse, and I didn't even have to go all the way back to the 1960's to think of her.

Out selling books with Dublin LeChat. Dublin says that you, too, need to buy books right now, or he will explode with rage. www.amazon.com/dp/B09ZVMLVFF

Author of Wicked - The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West: "I took a colorful feel-good fairy-tale musical and turned it into a fucked-up story of sex, violence, and evil." Broadway: "Love it! But what if we got rid of the sex, violence, and evil, and put it to feel-good music?"

Dublin LeChat wishes you all a very loud and furious holiday season. www.youtube.com/watch?v=knDr...

"We the people" and "shall not be infringed" are not even complete sentences, yet they're definitely the only parts of the Constitution that millions of Americans know.

This is naked Kremlin propaganda. "The will of the majority is mob rule! Two wolves and a sheep voting for what to have for dinner!" The people don't want to *eat* you, dumbass. Cannibals are in a minority, and would only get to eat you if you submit to the will of the few, as you're advocating.

Until such a time as they turn thirteen, I'll just tell my kids that this is how the second Trump presidency played out:

Assaulting a 15-year-old is only better than assaulting a 5-year-old in the same way that being tampled by twenty elephants is better than being trampled by twenty-four elephants.