Possibly the greatest tweet of all time

you know how i know im a 44yo dad? how much i laughed at this shit

PFM on break! After some thought, since both @josefschwem.com and I got a lot going on in December, we're going to take a longer break from updating. We'll likely be back early January. Happy Holidays!

Hi folks. There won't be any PFM updates this coming week. We'll do our best to be back 12/8. I came down with a cold and feel like doodoo.

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! Turkey Day accomplished. Now I just gotta lay here and think of something mildly funny to type in this tweet.

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! So you're telling me that if I met Better Call Saul in real life, he not only wouldn't be able to save me in court, but his name is actually Bob Odenkirk? What a sick joke!

I just remembered the punchline to this comic by @gobolatula.bsky.social and burst out laughing again.

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! In case you didn't know, there is sludge everywhere that's completely free! Sludge of all kinds!

On the last boss of Silksong. Been dying over and over the last few nights. Nothing new. This is the last time. What a game. I'll let you all know when I win.

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! I don't think anyone should be allowed to throw food away, ever, for any reason. I don't think it should be eaten either. I'm like a vegan but the next level of that.

I broke 2 controllers playing Silksong. I didn't thing I was mashing the buttons that hard, but maybe I underestimated just how angry I've been while playing. Maybe this is why they priced the game so low.

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! Trying to grow a beard on my fingernails. It just seems like the most unsettling thing I can do and I'm trying to get fired from my job as a normal guy doing regular stuff.

Postman Pat kicks ass

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! Here's a tip for if you want to beat any video game: cheat. It works every time! Make it so you never get hurt and never die. Do it so much that you figure out how to do that in real life too. gobolatula.com/pfm/comic/62...

PLEASE FORGIVE ME Recently I have been fantasizing about becoming a competitive eater. Do they have prizes for how much you enjoy a meal? I'd dominate screaming "YUMMY" after eating a crunchy taco.

What if in The Scent of a Woman, instead of trying to kill himself, Al Pacino was constantly threatening to shoot himself in the penis with a revolver and Chris O'Donnell was trying to prevent this and get him to not be so grouchy. Wait, I feel like I've already come up with this idea.

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! If growing up wasn't necessary, would you choose to stay small and young? What if you still got smarter and stronger but had a little kid body. Imagine knocking out a full grown man with a little kid fist. Seems stupid to me. I'd grow up like normal.

Holy shit

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! When I was a little kid and saw a chicken for the first time i lost my mind. Such a funny animal.

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! There should be a holiday celebrating the life of the guy who first discovered the banana. Just think for a second about how great those things are.

I call this meal "My Own Personal Hell."

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! After much consideration, I think it should be illegal for really tasty, high-calorie food to make you gain weight if eaten in massive quantities. I just spent a month not eating potato chips and HATED it. Jk it was okay. :)

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! For the first time in my life, I ate a ghost. Now I'm sometimes controlled by the regrets of this dead dude but it was still cool.

The Stupid Adventures of Ally & Pasqualo: "Start Wreck"

Kickstarter just made NESBOOK a “Project We Love”! I love it too! www.kickstarter.com/projects/nin...

The only thing I've been tempted to use AI for is to change the Solozzo murder scene in The Godfather to instead make Michael Corleone stand up and shoot himself in the penis. But no, not even for that will I stoop so low. I'll just do the ethical thing and hire Al Pacino.

I had a dream that there was a sports team that replaced their offensive mascot with Glep. Then there were like tons and tons of people wearing Glep hats.

“Oh, look, this get better …‘F’ in history! You even flunk something not happen yet?”

Last weekend I had an experience that most otaku can only dream of: I had to explain to an older Japanese man why I was wearing a Sailor Moon T-shirt. He looked confused, and perhaps disgusted, at the sight of a 41-year old odd-looking white dude still super enthused about a 90s little girl cartoon.

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! Despite what researchers say, it's actually good for trees when it rains. They told me so. gobolatula.com/pfm/comic/61...

Apologies! There will be no PFM updates next week. There'll be one Friday though!

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! Bologna sandwich experts agree: two slices bologna, one slice cheese, one slice mustard, optional slice lettuce, three slice white bread, one slice of potato chips for crispiness

It's kind of cool to me how there was a brief period of time where we as a society were united under the banner of "crab rangoons are actually really tasty"

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! I've been trying to develop big forehead cream to make big foreheads even bigger, but all I could come up with is something to make your brain smarter. Darn. Maybe I should use some of this stuff to come up with the forehead cream. Big forehead cream. Sorry.

this has been one of my favorite panels we've done recently.

i've reached a point in silksong where i actually don't mind getting my ass beat over and over again. trobbio rocks

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! After careful consideration, I am finally uninstalling the internet. I just don't want the internet on my computer anymore. It's stupid and I hate it. It's ok that it's on my phone though. I got one o them stupid phones.

If you care about trans folks you will stop buying Harry Potter shit. Thank you.

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! Time for me to invest in eggs. I've been putting it off for years. I could eventually make a billion considering we're still trying to find that goose that lays golden ones. honk

PLEASE FORGINR MR BSKY ANNOYING MEEEE GO HERE gobolatula.com/pfm/comic/61...

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! If I could freeze time, I wouldn't rob banks or anything like that. Honestly, I'd just take long naps. Maybe I'd walk across the country to get a slice of pizza too, but mainly I'd sleep.

Space Cunts 16: Space Clap full size: www.merryhellcomic.com/wp-content/u...

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! Sometimes I wish I had the strength of an elephant. That way I could grab a bunch of peanuts and have the fortitude to eat them all at once.

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! Ever try a vegan orange? They're actually not bad. They taste almost exactly like the oranges you violently hack off trees and rip their skin off. Oh, you didn't know?

Had a dream a while back in which I discovered the existence of the "Grave of the Fireflies/Super Mario World 2-in-1" for the Wii. It basically functioned as a DVD except for a "special features" section that literally only had an SNES emulator playing Mario World. It went for absurd prices on eBay

SPOOKY MONTH!!! Art by @pinupcitizen.bsky.social