Aaron Tinsman
@atinsman.bsky.social
📤 415
📥 285
📝 1754
“Maybe a Han Solo type” Big fan of
@erinjoy.bsky.social
, the Dodgers, iced coffee, and democracy
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about 22 hours ago
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The intro to every fundraising email from pseudo-Christian right wing organizations immediately after AOC gives a speech somewhere
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about 22 hours ago
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When Jeff Foxworthy gets mad at the cable guy:
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about 23 hours ago
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Parenting toddlers be like
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1 day ago
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Sleep with one eye open Gripping your pillow tight Exit light Enter night Take my hand We're off to never-never land
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1 day ago
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This is a safe space, yes? I know that it’s technically straight to have had a crush on Alice in Twilight but also it’s the single most lesbian thing about me
2 days ago
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The Dust Bowl, 1931-1936:
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2 days ago
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Is it just me, or does the diss track in a kid’s movie have the same vibe as playing TobyMac in a Christian movie so you know that’s the bad guy? This tweet, like all tweets, is a Kpop Demon Hunters tweet
2 days ago
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Mike Johnson is refusing to seat Jesus (I-Palestine) so we’re unable to get the petition to release the God’s files. God’s files are made up by the Democrats anyway. But are also on Pam Bondi’s desk. And also are very damaging but only to Democrats. I barely knew God and never went to his island.
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3 days ago
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Trump talking about that Time Magazine he was on
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3 days ago
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Sen. Graham, reportedly fanning himself: “My stars and garters! This is a direct threat to the privacy of every hardworking American, especially those of us with…let’s call them specialized apps. How is a charming, well-mannered, eligible Southern senator meant to thrive under these conditions?”
4 days ago
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Once the south collectively declared mac ‘n’ cheese to be a vegetable, its chances of rising again dropped dramatically
7 days ago
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We’ve collectively lost our damn minds
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8 days ago
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You can tell what a man fears by what he locks up at night
8 days ago
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Native Americans:
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8 days ago
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When your mom blanks on Bumblebee’s name:
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8 days ago
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The word of the Lord, for the people of God
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8 days ago
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Me whenever
@brentwaggoner.bsky.social
tweetz:
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8 days ago
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When you’re trying to think of the name of that Cloris Leachman sitcom:
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9 days ago
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When they stopped minting the penny but had a great production day otherwise
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9 days ago
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We’re beyond satire
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11 days ago
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11 days ago
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May every day be another wonderful secret
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12 days ago
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By far the most fun part of being colorblind is the lowkey conspiracies I get to invent about how things like the Aurora aren’t real Anyway, happy for you cis-sighted folks, or whatever
13 days ago
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When the people don’t start immediately liking the comedy gold I tweet out:
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13 days ago
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Your spouse after the kids barge in
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15 days ago
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When you score but it feels icky
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15 days ago
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Parenting boys be like
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15 days ago
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New name for government shutdown just dropped
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16 days ago
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Me describing Sean Astin’s lawyer boss role in Franklin & Bash:
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16 days ago
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Fun fact: when the philosophers collectively known as Nickelback said, “look at this photograph, every time I do it makes me laugh” it was about this picture
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17 days ago
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Hang it in the Louvre (so I can steal it)
17 days ago
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Focus on the Tax Cuts
loading . . .
Focus on the Family opposes free meals in schools – Baptist News Global
Focus noted the absence of any organized opposition to the Colorado’s meals program and was willing to stand in the gap.
https://baptistnews.com/article/focus-on-the-family-opposes-free-meals-in-schools/
17 days ago
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I don’t know guys, I’m starting to think that maybe cutting food assistance and fighting to kill healthcare subsidies because those are “Democrat programs” while you extend tax cuts to your wealthy donors might be unpopular.
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18 days ago
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reposted by
Aaron Tinsman
LaurelindóreNess 🌿
18 days ago
Mustard and onion on his kevlar already, Mom's spaghetti.
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I’m gonna break out this bad boy on election night next year as a little treat
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19 days ago
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When someone asks how you’re doing/feeling anytime between October-March:
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19 days ago
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When you announce the birth of your third child:
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19 days ago
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Ha ha ha you guys keep making your little jokes, but if that paper was good enough to print my degree from Trump University on then it’s good enough to help the oldest president we’ve ever elected find his way back when he wanders off
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19 days ago
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You didn’t ask, but her husband was my age when she was born. Anyway if your spouse remembers Watergate and you don’t remember 9/11, y’all have made some errors.
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20 days ago
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This can all be fixed if Mike Pence has the courage to do the right thing
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20 days ago
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Art of the Deal-in-chief’s party holds a trifecta, but he’s weak and can’t get it done. Can’t even lead his own party when he has both chambers of congress and a blanket go ahead from SCOTUS. Enigmas never age, have you noticed that? Thank you for your attention to this matter.
20 days ago
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Awful lot of “it would be great to have the first black woman governor” coming from people who didn’t vote for noted black woman Kamala Harris
20 days ago
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Things the government can do while shut down: -Collect taxes -Pay members of congress -Extrajudicial killings -send paramilitary forces into cities Things the government can not do while shutdown: -fund SNAP -talk about funding health insurance -swear in congresswoman-elect Adelita Grijalva
20 days ago
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When your sibiling does something stupid but you can’t swear because grandma is around:
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21 days ago
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21 days ago
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"It may not work out how you think it will or how you hope it does. But believe me, it will all work out." -Ted Lasso
21 days ago
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add a skeleton here at some point
23 days ago
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Good night, everybody
23 days ago
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I haven’t had enough coffee for this
23 days ago
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