BLOOD COUNTESS (Michael Reeves, 1969) Barbara Steele gives a terrifying and bravura performance as the notorious Elizabeth Báthory, a Hungarian aristocrat who allegedly bathed in the blood of young girls to retain her youth.

ASYMMETRICAL (Scott Spiegel, 1987) While gathering blood evidence at a crime scene, a pair of rookie forensic techs fall under the spell of a cursed mirror that serves as a portal to Hell. Starring Bruce Campbell, Barbara Crampton, Blanca Guerra, Brad Dourif, Veronica Cartwright

HOUSE OF THE UNDEAD (Massimo Cazzioni, 1969) Two legendary vampires compete for possession of John Dee’s great-great granddaughter, whose blood is rumored to be the regenerative elixir of life. Cristopher Lee, Veronica Carlson, Paul Köhler, and Boris Karloff as Van Helsing.

HOUSE OF THE UNDEAD (Massimo Cazzioni, 1969) Two legendary vampires compete for possession of John Dee’s great-great granddaughter, whose blood is rumored to be the regenerative elixir of life. Cristopher Lee, Veronica Carlson, Paul Köhler, and Boris Karloff as Van Helsing.

ASYMMETRICAL (Scott Spiegel, 1987) While gathering blood evidence at a crime scene, a team of rookie forensic techs fall under the spell of a cursed mirror that serves as a portal to Hell. Starring Bruce Campbell, Barbara Crampton, Blanca Guerra, Brad Dourif, Veronica Cartwright

SHE-HULK (Larry Cohen, 1992). A mild-mannered lawyer (Brigitte Nielsen) receives a life-altering blood-transfusion from her cousin, Dr. Bruce Banner, after being shot by a local mobster (Eric Roberts). As a result, she finds herself transformed into a magical green rage-monster.

VAMPIRELLA (Jimmy Sangster, 1976) When the blood ocean of planet Drakulon runs dry, an audacious space vampire (Caroline Munro) travels to earth seeking the outcast remnants of her species. With Anthony Higgins, Freddie Jones, Lynne Frederick, and Peter Cushing as Van Helsing.

KEN RUSSELL’S DRACULA (1980). An ancient and elegant vampire with a taste for the blood of genius travels to London. Starring Peter O’Toole, with Peter Ustinov as Dr. Van Helsing, Oliver Reed as Renfield, Michael York as Harker, Sarah Miles as Mina, and Mia Farrow as Lucy.

A SHADOW STAINED WITH BLOOD (Massimo Cazzioni, 1976) In the midst of a viral outbreak, a deranged killer disrupts the orgiastic “pandemic party” at an Italian media tycoon’s isolated Mediterranean villa. Bernardino Zapponi’s script was adapted from Poe’s ‘Masque of Red Death.’

THE BLOOD ORANGES [Naranjas Sanguinas]  (Luis César Amadori, 1940) A pair of beautiful (and extremely adversarial) sisters (Mirtha Legrand and Nury Montsé) intensify their sibling rivalry by competing for the romantic attentions of the neighborhood milkman (Pepe Iglesias).

GLIMPSE INSIDE YOUR VELVET BONES (Tim Burton, 2007) Zombie Edgar Allan Poe (Johnny Depp) is resurrected by jovial satanic necromantrix Helena Bonham Carter to write the screenplay for a Felliniesque director’s controversial new Giallo. With Michael Keaton and Lisa Marie.

SKIN & BONES (Alan Rafkin, 1965). A mild-mannered scientist’s invisibility experiment goes hilariously awry. Starring Don Knotts, Raquel Welch, and Kathleen Freeman. Features stop-motion animation by Ray Harryhausen. Based on the novel by Thorne Smith.

EASY DOES IT! (George Marshall, 1948) An exhausted radio entertainer seeks solitude at the remote Lost Caverns Resort Hotel, only to get tangled up with hypnotists, blackmailers, and femme fatales. Starring Bob Hope, Lucille Ball, William Bendix, Alan Mowbray, and Lenore Aubert.

LET’S HOPE THERE’S A HEAVEN (Justin Lin, 2020) A cynical, tough-as-nails stuntman (Lucas Lee) finds love and hope in the arms of a free-spirited hospice nurse (Ana de Armas) after being diagnosed with a terminal, unspecified blood disease.

DAUGHTER OF FRANKENSTEIN (Erle C. Kenton, 1937) A deranged scientist (Lionel Atwill) marries the daughter of Victor Frankenstein (Kathleen Burke) in the hope that he might discover secrets of immortality within her ancestral castle. Costarring Boris Karloff and Edward Van Sloan.

OK but I actually need this.

THE TANGLEWOOD (Terence Fisher, 1967) A desperate young widow (Susan Denberg) hires famed occult investigator Thomas Carnacki (Peter Cushing) to investigate the haunted forest which surrounds her newly inherited estate in Nottinghamshire, which has a reputation for "devouring wayfarers".

BLOODY BRUJERÍA (Acalan Tecaxco, 2019) A cartel assassin (Keanu Reeves) and a transient curandero (Nicholas Cage) must battle a coven of Satanic witches in a haunted Tepito apartment building to defend themselves against the apocalypse. Starring Eiza González, and Maurice Compte.

SPOOKS ON THE LOOSE (Leslie Goodwins, 1942) “Boogie Woogie Debutante” Carole Landis inherits a notorious haunted hotel. When guests begin to die at her house warming party, she must determine the murderer’s identity. Lionel Atwill, Cesar Romero, Bela Lugosi, and Lenore Aubert.

Abbott & Costello Meet the Creature from the Black Lagoon (Charles Lamont, 1955) Two bumbling boat rental agents agree to charter a scientific exploration of a mysterious lagoon in the Amazon, reportedly haunted by an aquatic monster and a feral jungle queen.

HERSHEL & THE GOBLINS (Mel Brooks, 1978) Rabbinical prankster Hershel of Ostropol (Gene Wilder) drives a pack of impious imps out of a haunted synagogue during Hanukkah and challenges the goblin king himself. Based on a series of Polish folktales.

BLOODY BRUJERÍA (Acalan Tecaxco, 2019) A cartel assassin (Keanu Reeves) and a transient “curandero” (Nicholas Cage) must battle a coven of satanic witches in a haunted Mexico City apartment building to prevent a ritual intended to spark the apocalypse. With Eiza González, and Maurice Compte.

HUNGERFORD ABBEY (Jacques Tourneur, 1955) A love-starved governess (Deborah Kerr) travels to a remote - and reportedly haunted - country estate to care for the children of a Byronic widow (Gregory Peck), after the mysterious and violent death of her predecessor.

DON’T (Edgar Wright, 1974) A small team of psychics, skeptics, Wiccans, and parapsychologists agree to spend Walpurgis Night in the deeply haunted Brackenridge Hall, “a monument to sadism, blasphemy, and perversion.” Unfortunately, a local Satanic cult has had exactly the same idea.

BACKCOUNTRY (Dan Ford, 1984) A group of high school friends celebrate graduation at a remote beachfront cabin. Little do they know that the surrounding woods are haunted by a feral and murderous inbred family. Starring George Clooney, Laura Dern, Demi Moore, and Jason Alexander

MOZAMBIQUE (Marc Allégret, 1935)  Two American dancers (Josephine Baker, Anna May Wong) open an exotic Parisian nightclub. In business and in love they are haunted by the hypocritical disdain and fetishistic yearnings that fuel the fantasy life of colonial Europe.

ABBOTT & COSTELLO MEET THE CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON (Charles Lamont, 1955) Two bumbling boat rental agents (Bud & Lou) agree to charter the scientific exploration of a mysterious lagoon in the Amazon, reportedly haunted by an aquatic monster and a feral jungle queen (Bettie Page).

A GHOST AT NOON ( Jean-Luc Godard, 1963) The beautiful wife (Kim Novak) of a screenwriter (Frank Sinatra) begins to suspect him of using her as bait to land a big job after an encounter at Cinecittà with the an arrogant and lecherous producer (Jack Palance). 2/2

GHOSTBUSTERS 3 (Ivan Reitman, 1992) A curator at the Museum of Natural History (Catherine O'Hara) accidentally opens an inter-dimensional portal that assembles every ghost in Manhattan into the giant ectoplasmic body of Ivo the Destructor. It’s the Ghostbusters versus Gozer’s cult.

A GHOST AT NOON ( Jean-Luc Godard, 1963) An American writer in Rome (Frank Sinatra) is offered a job as script doctor on Fritz Lang's troubled production of The Odyssey. 1/2

QUETZALCOATL vs KING KONG (Acalan Tecaxco, 2019) A team of Mesoamerican Naturalists discover a gigantic reptilian egg in a forgotten temple on Tengkorak Island. When Quetzalcōātl hatches, a battle with Kong cannot be far off. Indira Andrewin, Rudy Youngblood, and Michael Peña.

BUCKAROO BANZAI AGAINST THE WORLD CRIME LEAGUE (W. D. Richter, 1988) Dr. Eduardo Lizardo (Peter MacNicol) is recruited by the World Crime League to exact revenge against Buckaroo Banzai and the Hong Kong Cavaliers while, simultaneously, stealing a doomsday device from Area 57.

THE PROPERTY OF A LADY (Martin Campbell, 1992) A legendary Hong Kong thief (Anita Mui) steals a bio-weapon on behalf of a deranged ultranationalist (John Malkovich). James Bond (Timothy Dalton) must prevent nuclear blackmail and an international incident. Connie Nielsen co-stars.

CONVENTION CITY (Archie Mayo, 1933) The Honeywell Rubber Company holds a convention in Atlantic City, which quickly devolves into an orgy of drinking, sex, and blackmail. This film was considered so scandalous that it singlehandedly initiated the Hollywood Production Code.

WEATHER PERMITTING (John Daigle, 2020) Personal animosity between a transit bus driver (Adam Driver) and the owner of a snow plow service (Liam Neeson) spills over into violence when a devastating blizzard hits downtown Montreal.

TALISMAN (Gore Verbinski, 2020) The CEO of a multibillion-dollar social networking service (Armie Hammer) sends beard shavings to an outspoken rapper and influencer (Letitia Wright) so that she can make an amulet to protect him from ISIS.

NESSIE (Bryan Forbes, 1978) This infamous collaboration between Hammer Studios and Toho Films features the legendary lake serpent escaping the confines of Loch Ness to attack ships at sea. Starring Peter Cushing, Horst Janson, and Lea Brodie. Special effects by Teruyoshi Nakano.

NESSIE (Bryan Forbes, 1978) This infamous collaboration between Hammer Studios and Toho Films features the legendary lake serpent escaping the confines of Loch Ness to attack ships at sea. Starring Peter Cushing, Horst Janson, and Lea Brodie. Special effects by Teruyoshi Nakano.

Captain Kronos – Monster Slayer (Brian Clemens, 1975) The second chapter of Hammer's Kronos Quartet finds the acclaimed vampire hunter attempting to save a beautiful pair of orphaned noblewomen from the ravages of an incubus. Stars Horst Janson, Veronica Carlson, and Kate O'Mara

THE UNTHINKING LOBSTER (Orson Welles, 1961) When an Italian neorealist director replaces the Madonna of his Biblical epic with a typist whose face intrigues him, he is unprepared for her to begin working actual miracles on his film set. Starring Jeanne Moreau, Orson Welles, and Pier Paolo Pasolini.

And the Saturday Night movie is…I have never seen this!

This one seems vaguely familiar.

A BLACK CAT ON RED VELVET (Luciano Ercoli, 1974) An American doctor in Rome (Leonard Nimoy) becomes prime suspect in a series of murders. A wealthy heiress (Martine Beswick) discovers the killer’s true identity and blackmails Nimoy into an increasingly dangerous sexual power game.

THE ETERNAL CITY (Martin Scorsese, 1953) Aristocrats, politicians, and military officers vie for influence and power as mighty Rome transitions from a participatory democracy to an authoritarian empire. Starring Marlon Brando, Richard Burton, Virginia Mayo, and Alec Guinness.

RAPACIOUS (Daniyah Clark, 2021) An entrepreneurial dancer (Megan Thee Stallion) discovers her path to absolute wealth and power after being bitten by a vampire (Idris Elba), much to the chagrin of her fiancé (Mike Colter) and club rival (Taylour Paige).

TIGRERO (Sam Fuller, 1955) A legendary big game hunter (John Wayne) is hired to protect a remote cattle ranch in the Amazon basin from a pair of rogue man-eating jaguar. Co-starring Ava Gardner and Tyrone Power.

THE HILDEBRAND RARITY (Peter R. Hunt, 1976) British secret agent James Bond (Duncan Milne) goes undercover as an ichthyologist to infiltrate the Seychelles seastead HQ of a megalomaniacal libertarian billionaire power couple (Franco Nero and Jacqueline Bisset).

RAPACIOUS (Daniyah Clark, 2021) An entrepreneurial dancer (Megan Thee Stallion) discovers her path to absolute wealth and power after being bitten by a vampire (Idris Elba), much to the chagrin of her fiancé (Mike Colter) and club rival (Taylour Paige).

BIG ADVENTURE (Kevin Morton, 1985) Secret agent P. W. Herman (James Brolin) helps a brilliant industrial designer named Dottie (Morgan Fairchild) recover the stolen X-1 experimental motorcycle, which contains a secret compartment filled with microfilm. “Based on a true story!”

THE CASE OF THE CALAMITOUS VAMP (Archie Mayo, 1936) A lawyer defends the same woman on three separate charges - first for theft, then for espionage, and finally for murder. Warren William as Perry Mason, Claire Dodd as Della Street, and Eddie Quillan as investigator Paul Drake.