Being adopted sucks. Just, period.

I think every boy needs a flesh light and something that properly touches his g-spot.

Yeah I’m sorry. I’ve been a huge dead by daylight player for so long (since the silent hill chapter) And it’s current state is the worst is ever been in whether you’re killer or survivor. It just feels… so unfun?

I need this for later. Conversations in my discord are gonna happen LMAO

Guards!!! Motorboat that man

I love big hairy men, skinny twinks, built hunks, nefarious cubs, lecherous otters, and all in between

I pet sitting and I legit laid on the ground so this girl could sleep on the couch and she set her her on my shoulder everytime and it makes me so happy. I love animals. 🥹

It’s been 24 hours since I posted about it last. Let me confirm. I’m STILL stuck on the middle school of silent hill f and I’m getting frustry. 🥲 #silenthill #horror #gaming

I’ve been stuck on the middle school in silent hill f for so long and I swear to god I have looked everywhere 62x where tf is this key. #silenthillf #horror #gaming

I just finished dispatch and I cannot tell you how changed I am and how amazing of a story it was. #dispatch #blondeblazer #invisigal #games #videogames

No one told me Robyn released a new song let alone that it’s a banger and yall are fake for that. 🤣

“OBJECTION YOUR HONOR! My defendant already said he couldn’t have been at the scene of the murder! He already gave his Alibi that he was stuck in his bed for 3 hours due to his paralysis demon: Nelly’s ‘Just a Dream’ on repeat.”

ⓘ This user wants chili & cornbread ⓘ This user also does not want to MAKE said chili & cornbread

Was going to make a poster tonight but this inspired me to try my hand at a zine

Hey guys, my husband and I’s *award winning* 🏅📖 E-book officially releases today, if you like sci-fi at all give it a look. It’s only $5 and really helps independent authors get noticed. a.co/d/3JFZMpa

Hey, sorry, gay. Was feeling something somewhere 😛

I will tunnel tea baggers in 2v8. Like gurl I had to wait 30 minutes to get in this game and this is the level of disrespect you want to serve? OH HELL NAH. #dbd #2v8

A certain man got an abscess near his bootyhole and couldn’t stop picking at it when we told him not to. So now he has to have the cone of shame for 2 weeks. 🙃😂

This ball of floof is so photogenic I simply cannot even.

I will say. I’m a big fan of some of the gays/queers I’ve met over the years. Technically that means 10 because I didn’t knowingly interact with anyone gay/queer (grew up in a town with a pop. of 3000) till I was 16. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ But regardless 95% have been the absolute best. 🥹👉👈

I crawled up into bed and Link immediately bundled up next to me when I got comfy. I sent the photo to some friends and Siri’s described it as “cat laying in bed.” And honestly. Don’t tell him, but I think Siri is in the right for thinking he isn’t a dog in this picture. 😂

You cannot tell me Tiffany Valentine wouldn’t still be down. 👀

Sometimes I wake up at 2am and I’m like “I need to walk the dog, but I’m keeping the mumu on.” And frankly I don’t know what led me here, but if you don’t have a mumu I’m telling you that you should reconsider.

🎶what hurts the most, is being so close, and having so much to say (much to say), and watching you walk away🎶

I’m telling yall. This dog is so posh. Even the ways he crosses his legs is so regal. 😂😂😂

By nature I’m a possum. I keep playing dead when life wants some. (Stop wanting some)

Updating my LEGO White House

“Think back to your childhood. Do you remember when the anxiety started?”

Backrub and/or a dick suck. I’m telling you, these are two of the 3 ways to win a man’s heart.

I’m sick and it’s making me sweat a lot but I’m surviving and thriving. I hope you all are continuing to be as beautiful as I remember

Guess I’m not getting a costume this year 😂

Open gallery last night. This repurposed cigarette machine dispenses little artworks.

my will is just "i leave everything to the person who suffocated me with their giant boobs and if that's not how i died all my belongings are to be burned as, clearly, no one deserves them."

It is a high holy day

I’ll be executed by firing squad but not before I host a charcuterie party for them to supplement the calories they’re gonna lose. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I know antifa isn't a real organization because I don't get 40 texts a week from them asking for donations.

Rapture etiquette questions? I’ll start: Can I bring a +1? Is there a dress code? Are you expected to bring the host a gift?

This was me and mama. Tell me she wasn’t there for me.

Bruce Wayne: I need to become more than a man. I need to become…a SYMBOL Stupid Alfred: wot Masta Bruce like inna drumkit

If you see this, QTP with your favorite Water-Type Pokémon 💧💦

One of my best friends and I got a caricature at the fair and the theme has me dying.

Bruh

peeing after sexting so i don’t get an hdmi

When someone asks me if I want a grilled cheese. #dbd #deadbydaylight #unknown

*My mid 20’s friends and I talking about our stomach issues* “I have gastritis.” “I have IBS.” “I just don’t eat properly.”

Good morning it’s game day

HOW TO CHANGE YOUR BED SHEETS (CAT OWNER EDITION) *************** 1. Remove cat from bed 2. Strip dirty sheets from bed 3. Remove cat from bed 4. Stretch fitted sheet across bottom corners of bed 5. Remove cat from bed 6. Stretch fitted sheet across top corners of bed 7. Remove cat from bed

being reminded that it is always only about who you know, not what you know is so demotivating.

This dog do be loving car rides #kleekai