Kate
@kateness.bsky.social
📤 1007
📥 475
📝 284
I’m doing amazing, sweetie
All I want is a chance to prove $163 million wouldn’t turn me into a bad person
5 days ago
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My therapist: back when you were a kid, what adult would you have felt safe with talking about your emotions? Me: Mrs Potts from Beauty & the Beast
6 days ago
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I’m guessing my vagina has a southern accent because it’s down south
17 days ago
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I hate it when I feel like eating but I don’t feel like cooking
26 days ago
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Does being an adult mean a perpetual tiny amount of heartburn or am I unwell? And other questions I don’t want to ask, more at 11
about 1 month ago
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Why is it called Animal Crossing? Are they/you angry or are they/you walking by?
about 1 month ago
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Why do we call them hot dogs when we could call them warm wieners
about 1 month ago
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I don’t have any slutty clothes so I just have to be slutty on the inside
about 2 months ago
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I think butts are cool because we just naturally have a seat where ever we go
about 2 months ago
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If you’re consoling someone for using the wrong pronouns, you can give them their there there they’re they’re
2 months ago
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I wonder if Annie was ok that she had been hit by a smooth criminal
2 months ago
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Gonna get a rock and paint the word “party” on it. I’ll bring it inside at night and say “party rock in the house tonight”
2 months ago
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It’s not a fancy restaurant if I don’t drop something on my shirt
2 months ago
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I don’t understand garnish on plates. If I’m not supposed to eat it then put something better than garden trash. How about an iPhone or a cool pen?
2 months ago
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Me when I’m feeling fancy but I’m still a work in progress
3 months ago
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Water is great because if you see someone drinking it you can say “water you doing?”
3 months ago
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Mr Darcy walking toward me in the misty sunrise only he’s just three bags of peanut butter m&ms in a trench coat
5 months ago
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“It began with the forging of the great rings. Three were given to the Elves, immortal, wisest and fairest of all beings” said Galadriel, an elf
5 months ago
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One of my special skills is waiting to eat until I get hangry that you’re not feeding me
6 months ago
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Anybody can interact, but will anybody interact? One like = one prayer, say amen and get a squirrel to cross your path
6 months ago
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Idk man, if my mother was with apple cider vinegar idk if I’d BRAG about it
6 months ago
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A Hot Pocket is also a ravioli
6 months ago
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Talking to my nipples like “what is it, girl? What are you pointing at?”
7 months ago
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I really don’t want to go to sleep in case it happens and I miss it
7 months ago
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Based on what I know I just assume all British guys’ cum tastes like Worcestershire sauce
8 months ago
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I just swallowed my coffee wrong and basically died at this coffee shop and the guy next to me got up and left. Life hack! P.S. new band name, Coughing! At the Coffee Shop
8 months ago
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I hate being hungry in the middle of the night because I have to tell myself no, and myself really doesn’t like that
8 months ago
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My hobbies include adding items to an online shopping cart at 2am
8 months ago
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Just once I’d like to thrown down my enemy and smite his ruin upon the mountainside
8 months ago
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In the Cars universe the reality tv show was called The Wheel World
9 months ago
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9 months ago
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Going to the dispensary after therapy is another form of therapy
9 months ago
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I had a salad for lunch and then 16 handfuls of Cheetos for lunch dessert
9 months ago
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Omg what if Korg from Thor called Thor “Thorg” Yes, I’m high
9 months ago
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I’m like a dog because I want love but I’m just out of reach
9 months ago
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I fought the nap and the nap won
9 months ago
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If they’re so worried about a Muslim person in power, then they should be supporting the separation of church and state but lmao
9 months ago
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Just looked at the clock on the microwave. It’s 12 seconds o’clock
10 months ago
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Every yoga pose I see I’m like “I can totally do that” but lemme tell you I totally can no
10 months ago
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I’m American. If I want to go for a nice walk I driver there first
10 months ago
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I’m not like other girls. I didn’t discover the band The Shins from Garden State. I saw them on Gilmore Girls 💅
10 months ago
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Gonna take a nap listening to Max Miller talk about Spotted Dick and hope I have some fun dreams
10 months ago
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reposted by
Kate
Jez
10 months ago
I hope God’s next test for me is "can she handle a ridiculous amount of money"
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Just once I’d like to wake up to birds and mice bringing me breakfast
10 months ago
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I thought there would be more farmers for sale at this farmers market
10 months ago
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If you met on the internet, then you intermet
10 months ago
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Happy Father’s Day to anyone I’ve ever called Daddy
10 months ago
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Look I may be insufferable and exhausting and needy
10 months ago
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Ending my day like I started it, in bed
10 months ago
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