This is how antisemitism has evolved over the past century. open.substack.com/pub/willieha...

Do you remember back in the 70s when you could coordinate your outfits with the flocked wallpaper?

Dear POTUS Thank you for your concern about the Chinese terminating hockey and the Stanley Cup. The Cup has been won by US teams for the past 32 years. As you have ICE agents on every major street corner in America I'm sure they can take care of any pesky Chinese agents. Canadian hockey fans 🇨🇦

Autocorrect changed "I hope you are okay" to "I hope you have a horrible and painful death".

My wife and I agreed no gifts this year for Valentine's Day. So I'm online looking for a gift.

If there's no jelly available, what do you put on this peanut butter sandwich?

Does the 5 second rule apply to dropped ice cream?

The school PTA is just a herd of Karens.

Thank you for reaching out to text me. It can take up to 5 business days for me to process what you said.

Me as a teen: Hiding in the garage smoking weed. Me today: Hiding in the garage smoking weed.

I don't quite understand why my wife gave me monogrammed pyjamas with the initials DNR.

I'm not a multi-tasker. I'm more of a "as little as you can by with" tasker.

My red flags come with decorative flag poles.

I haven't seen Bugs Bunny in years. I hope he has some new material for the halftime show. Though I do like his Barber of Seville.

In a recent poll, 7 out of 10. people never understood the survey questions.

Does a sandwich taste different based on the way it's cut? Horizontal? Vertical? Diagonal?

Crime solving would be so much easier if the victims were more cooperative.

What rhymes with Black Plague? I'm starting to work on my Valentine's Day cards.

If you are in the New York area, I will be speaking at the Holocaust Memorial and Tolerance Center on April 26. I would would love to meet you there. The registration link is below. wl.donorperfect.net/weblink/webl...

I will never understand how my wife does not remember what I told her 3 minutes ago but will recall with precision what I said 30 years ago.

Should I attend my friend's funeral when he failed to show up for mine?

I'm sorry but "pasta salad" doesn't deserve to be called a salad. It's just cooked pasta with mayo or dressing. Add veggies and it's still not a salad.

Would anyone like to go to the Super Bowl? It seems a guy I know bought tickets last year and now his daughter is getting married. He needs someone to take his place. It takes place in a church in Pittsburgh. The bride is Suzanne and she will be wearing white.

Forget about putting fluoride in the water supply. They should be putting Ativan in the water.

I remember back when I didn't need to identify photos with traffic lights to prove I was human.

My wife's idea of foreplay involves searching through her purse for a Werther's.

Does a sandwich taste different based on the way it's cut? Horizontal? Vertical? Diagonal?

I slipped in the shower and now Google is showing me ads for shower chairs. Who told them?

Roma (Gypsies) were also targetted by the Nazis for genocide. open.substack.com/pub/willieha...

I've been banned from the grocery store for allegedly over squeezing the Charmin.

I don't mind being judged. It's the jail time I object to.

Suggested new events for the next Olympics: 1. Assembling an IKEA dresser 2. Getting kids out of the house for school 3. Feeding a family of 5 for a week for $200 4. Parking at the grocery store on a Saturday morning 5. Laundry

I said for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; until death do us part. But I never mentioned sharing this pint of ice cream.

If you feel like screaming into the void, try catching a showing of the Melania doc.

Once in a while someone will pop up in a comment accusing me of stealing a joke. A joke that has been told over and over again for decades. People are strange.

When the temperatures rise above -10°C it's spring-like!

Toronto hit a record high of 15°C on January 9. Since then we have been in a deep freeze and it will remain like this well into February.

Hey guys. Stress impacts on testosterone. Here's how. open.substack.com/pub/willieha...

If you have seen the Melania documentary, please no spoilers.

Can someone unplug and plug back in 2026. Something seems to be not working right.

I remember when I was a child that I once ran away from home. No one noticed which was a harbinger of what was to come.

I had to check mark that "I am not a robot" to book a blood test. The lab ain't Ticketmaster. No one is trying to scoop up all the time slots.

Catherine and John are back together.

OMG someone broke into my car and left 4 tickets to the Melania movie on the dash.

My International Holocaust Remembrance Day post. open.substack.com/pub/willieha...

On #InternationalHolocaustRemembranceDay I light memorial candles for my half sisters Laja and Jenta. They were 27 and 11 months when they were murdered in an Auschwitz gas chamber in August 1942. They deserve to be here more than me.

On #InternationalHolocaustRemembranceDay I light memorial candles for my half sisters Laja and Jenta. They were 27 and 11 months when they were murdered in an Auschwitz gas chamber in August 1942. They deserve to be here more than me.

A woman at the liquor store asked me for my number. I told her 130 over 85.

There's a new dating site for seniors. It's called Carbon Dating.

What came first the couch or the potato?