I was never that interested in literature or reading, but only moderately intrigued due to my language talent & story writing interest. But none of that means I like it at all... so many, and I mean SO MANY people in my life tired convincing me that reading is good and that everyone should to it.

Now that I think about it, I do feel much more reassured and stable these days. I wouldn't say entirely, but it was better once I started seeing my school counselor. However, I didn't find a satisfactory work flow. well this is still gonna take a while

🦑💜

Deep down I’m still a person who values my friends very much, and wants to give out everything for others. Part of this may be driven by the desire of being valued by my friends, a desire that’s stronger than most.

我突然好想收集掌機。

I need to practice modeling tentacle hair. Drop your OCs with custom hair and I might model them 👇

我其實是一個邏輯很好的人。 事實上我也非常講求明確的事項分工還有有規矩的計劃，其實沒有想像中的那麼隨波逐流或隨便。

我還記得高中的時候，電腦老師有讓我們所有人做一個網路上的邏輯測驗，主要是針對要考電機/資工類的人。 我對老師來說特別亮眼，因為我在文組的班上是最高分的，還高了不少。 現在大學反思，自己目前為止寫過的短文和日常表現...哈，看來當時邏輯測驗做這麼高分真的不是巧合。

BOWSERS INSIDE STORY JUMPPPPP MODE 89 POINTS LETS GOOO

(Splatoon special) I wished they fixed screen's still existing accessiblity issues and buffed it TBH the weapon kit it's on has some really broken synergies, but screen as a special is just too weak and even actively sabotaging user's side Here's how I would buff it:

I don't play sonic racing crossworlds nor do I play puyo puyo tetris but This character render really caught my eye, for that I really like it's color & rendering style One more refrence for creating for my ideal stylized shader...

If I ever have a eel Splatoon OC I’m gonna make her a mad doctor and then namer her DR.Eelness (This name is kinda catchy)

(Commissions) As of right now I don’t feel too confident about doing comms because of my inconsistency and mental struggles. To me comms have a similar meaning to doing part time, one of my main motive is that I can start building up wealth even just a little bit And that I can feel independent.

…Well…. It’s probably not my gig.

It’s been a while since I played emperry, been grinding twinkle all day. Still get a kick out of it, makes me both unusually fast and reckless.

(Splatoon weapon concept) It is a spear based on a harpoon! Shoot the opponent with a dart-like ink as you thrust and jab with the spear, throw your weapon and as it lands, follow through like a blur on the battlefield. (1/4)

Look, some people might say I’m overworking myself too much. I’m only overworking myself when I’m forced to do things I don’t like/are not passionate about. Eh, doing the things I love and doing meaningful things are my ways of relaxing.

仔細想想，他的刀部太特殊了，實際上近戰用起來可能更像雉刀🤔

The firing mechanism of the spear requires some improvement.

(Splatoon weapon concept) It is a spear based on a harpoon! Shoot the opponent with a dart-like ink as you thrust and jab with the spear, throw your weapon and as it lands, follow through like a blur on the battlefield. (1/4)

Suddenly, I want to draw a Splatoon spear that uses ink.

Master sea hare.

I got a cheap drawing tablet!! #splatoon #splatoonart

最近算了一下我普雙的熟練度，把我用的兩個不同的帳號加在一起： 原牌：12,466,075 (+秩序/10+星） 帝王：6,757,775(10星） 耀：3,563,885（7星） 原來我距離30星有那麼近！（要是可以看到那徽章排在一起就好了…） 原牌的普雙不算限制的話，可以多到20星。 我從來都沒有意識到自己拿螃蟹肝了這遊戲多久，現在一看，覺得好壯觀。

Summing up my total freshness for all splat dualies (I used 2 separate accounts): Vanilla: 12,466,075 (+Order, 10+stars) Emperry: 6,757,775 (10 stars) Twinklez: 3,563,885 (7 stars) Now that I added everything together, I’m actually much closer to 30 stars on splat dualie than I thought.

Rabbids is one of the very few characters I feel like 3D art is better than digital art.

Known each other for almost 6 years and I still have difficulty approaching my friends. This... doesn't feel right to me.

現在才注意到一段時間以前 我把一些私人的紀錄打錯頻道，打到我伺服器的公告版了...😵‍💫 往好處想吧，都幾個月了沒有人提到甚至沒有任何反應的跡象，說不定根本沒人發現...對吧?

或許是因為我最近有很多心事和未解的情緒吧。 我沒有辦法很專心的自己一個人玩漆彈，打到一半就會開始想到其他事情去，也沒有辦法思考的很靈活。 Ah. I guess I really can’t soloQ until the fog in my head clears out.

That reminded me... Why do I have such an strong attachment with fantasy weapons, and that I always assosiate them with me or my OC's characteristics?

I want to learn and master fantasy weapon design so much. A fantasy weapon can be more than a tool, but something you use to assoiciate your character's idenity, maybe even symbolize. I can have a strong attachment to it.

Figured that I can actually have some anger issue dealing with even just everyday life, which might've explained why I can be unintentionally hurting my friend. When I got furstrated from say: Playing games, I have to stay away from others as much as I can. Otherwise I might push them away.

quick doodle of my Pokémon trainer oc in her winter outfit before spring comes ⚡️❄️🧣 #Pokemon #oc

Suddenly got a great idea for Shiya’s eyelid💖 Curly eyelid is pretty cute, retains the simplicity I like for player octoling, and adds a layer of elegance. Though I’ll have to see how that works in 3D

How I really feel…

Either way, I managed to keep myself company and stimulated so that I wasn’t completely overwhelmed by my negativity. But still, it’s there.

Sometimes my friends wonders why I can be so melancholic and depressing for no reason. That I seems to be stuck on the same loop, looking for answers that were right in front of me but neglected. I wonder why too. “I have no idea how you can be so melancholic” “I don’t know how to help you.”

Tbh I admire artists who recover quickly from art block, I’ve only been able to draw this all week :'P

So I haven’t uploaded this year huh coming soon :)

My BIGGEST gripe about side order has to be the weapon’s common tones. With Marina’s hack I can get more chips of the same tone more easily, and this is a good addition for us to make builds. …But why the hell that I can’t change a weapon’s tone???

(腦補漆彈世界觀：墨汁) 雖然說墨魚(魷魚&章魚)可以隨意切換他們的墨汁顏色，我會覺得它們應該有一個屬於自己/偏好的色彩。 這顏色是反映墨魚的個性還有渴望所產生的，而且也會受當下情緒稍微影響。 隨著墨魚的成長還有心靈上的成熟，他們會漸漸將自己的墨汁固定在一個色彩當中，甚至可能演化出一個屬於自己、獨特的墨汁紋路或風格。 如果兩個墨魚和彼此有著很強烈的羈絆或關係，他們的身體會慢慢的適應、認同，將彼此的墨汁視為一部分。而不會受到傷害或排斥。 因此，墨汁顏色成為一個墨魚能定義自己的一部分，甚至表現出和他人的感情。

等一下再翻中文 有關墨汁，自己發想的一些設定

(Headcanon about ink colors) Even though inkfish(Inklings&octolings) can change their ink colors the way they want, I’d like to think that they have a specific preferences. Depending on one’s personality and mentality, they can adapt to a specific ink color better, even becoming their natural color

Saw this image and it really made my day. Thank you Steven.

我也很想設計一些非墨魚的角色 編寫知雅跟嵐也探索世界的故事是一定的，至於主題是不是漆彈我想可能性暫時還很高... 角色設計畢竟也是我有興趣的一門，所以說不定可以利用斯普拉的世界觀，設計一些獨特的角色? (是這裡面也有一些墨魚，但是這樣大概可以懂我的意思?)

我想我對於嵐也的設計已經大致上有概念了。 他的性格、特質還有動機我都很清楚，自然也能看出什麼樣的設計適合他。 剩下的就是我該怎麼做出來...3D在我還沒有對整體設計夠了解之前我可能做不到。 所以我在嘗試畫出來 Well... I'm not sure where I'm going with this, but it doesn't look too bad!

Trying not to think about it... Since it doesn't really do me any good.

Since Bsky is still a fairly small platform and there is not much traction I own, I didn't really care about posting private stuff here. But maybe someday...

I can't stop feeling dissatisfaction from my life. It always feels like my life is little worse comparing to others all things considered, and I wasn't able to escape this negative thought even though I tried to.