My greatest strength is knowing what the fuck I am doing and talking about. My second greatest strength is cowing my supplicants into licking my taint without mentioning my smelly diaperloads.

Tim Kaine just fucking die you useless shit.

Democrats fucking caved for nothing. 24 million people losing health care for no fucking good reason. Light these pieces of shit on fire. I have no remaining patience for this level of being garbage shit elected officials.

As I noted at the time. It was a pretty easy defense case, albeit not a slam dunk.

Somebody should ask JayDee how he feels about the Gestapo denying detainees' access to the Eucharist. His answer is guaranteed to be hilarious.

I don't share James Talarico's faith, but I greatly appreciate it.

It does my heart good to know that children of anti-vaxx bullshitters, who are (the anti-vaxx bullshitters) themselves immune to shingles because they got vaccinated, will end up with shingles because their parents were too stupid to get them vaccinated. Shingles is annoying AF. I got it at age 26.

In 2001, terrorists tried to destroy the White House with a hijacked plane. 24 years later, the president of the United States accepted a plane from people funding terrorists and destroyed the White House himself.🔄

Given that just about every one of our Social Security Numbers have been compromised in hacks of financial corporations' data, the obvious solution to SSN fraud is to simply prohibit corporations from collecting or using SSNs in their operations.

He's right about the meatpacking companies, but he'll still fuck it all up.

Arm the Landscapers.

I will vote for a Democratic presidential candidate who promises to defund every single university that caved in to this motherfucker. They deserve precisely none of our tax dollars. Let them smolder in the ruin of their own making.

"They want everyone to know these thugs they’ve deployed to terrorize cities are battle-hardened and impervious to pain. But in court, they're such delicate flowers that if they are, say, lightly grazed by a sandwich, they are entitled to justice because of the horrific assault they have suffered."

Jeanine Pirro is on track to obtain fewer felony convictions than trump already has.

Sandwich Strong.

Words still have meaning. Fascists don't get to redefine them to suit their will.

I wanted to make fun of the Heritage Foundation guy revealing that antisemitism is his genuine religious belief, but these are the same assholes whose dipshit theology requires Israel to exist so Jebus can come back and smite all the Jews. They're just more willing to say it out loud these days.

Shelley was 100% wrong about Ozymandias. That motherfucker was an insecure loser.

The absolute last personal identification descriptor I want to see on any broadcast is "Democratic Strategist."

It's not complicated. They're all in for Israel no matter what, including overt genocide, so any criticism of Israel's conduct is lazily transformed into "antisemitic" criticism.

If I can (and should) boycott the Dallas Cowboys, the rest of the world can (and should) boycott FIFA.

I, too, would like my federal bailout guaranteed in advance.

Cuomo's gonna go full Stop the Steal, right?

Did the MAGAs win anything?

Turns out that cost of living is more unpopular than fascism by like 6 points.

Mikie Sherrill goes "helicopter pilot" in less than 30 seconds, right?

Once again, do not insult the jury's intelligence. The sandwich toss is on video for all to see.

For all their malevolence, these people are even more stupid and incompetent. Imagine being all "Just don't give the judge the part of the transcript that proves the malicious prosecution."

Never insult the jury's intelligence.

If NYC elects Mamdani as its mayor, Republicans will never stop calling Dems commies. Of course, that is also true regardless.

About 10 points of trump's approve/disapprove drop since he was re-inaugurated is disapproval from people who think he hasn't gone far enough to smite their enemies and burn the country to the ground. Which is fine, those people won't show up to vote.

Oh no, China might catch up to us in the fuckwitted bubble of throwing hundreds of billions of dollars into the garbage fit and lighting it on fire in service of thing that provides no value and nobody wants for anything more useful than generating memes. Here, China, please buy all our chips.

Colonel Lockjaw's deposition is going exactly how you suspected it would.

In the unlikely event that I ever end up on a jury considering anything having to do with the Gestapo, I will jury nullify that bitch.

Absolutely everything about Mike Johnson screams pedophile.

Luke Wilson grew up in Highland Fucking Park, not the middle of nowhere. Fuck him and AT&T.

From many years ago. my son remembered my stray, but very sincere, comment that one day I wanted to have Rusty Taco's chips with Torchy's Tacos' queso. And I was entirely right, he made it happen, we watched The Thing (1982), and I could not have had a better Halloween.

Robespierre 2028.

Oh ho, another comely 20-year-old lass has followed me because of my scintillating commentary despite never liking or commenting on anything I've ever written. Authenticity assured. What's that? A 10:1 following to dimwitted followers ratio? I'm sure that's meaningless.

This guy's a hero. And that warning did not come close to complying with the TRO.

Correlation between JD's massively increased lying and Chump's declining health?

Andrew is on a trajectory towards banishment from the Kingdom.

"We should be clear-eyed about this moment. We didn’t get here because Democrats failed to talk about 'kitchen-table issues' on the campaign trail. We got here because Democrats believed talking about kitchen-table issues was the only thing they needed to do." Exactly so.

Fascism didn't die with Mussolini, but Mussolini did.

Everything you need to know about Tarrant County Republicans.

Huckleberry Finn was homeless.

Salesforce cannot die enough or completely.

Gotta hand it to trump and a Mike Johnson, decreasing demand for groceries will lower prices.

Translation: I know that's how you want them to live, I'm just setting you up for later.

Translated: You and I know that's exactly what is happening, I'm just setting you up for later.