I wish this place was better than Twitter instead of just an alternative.

Soon… #ToTDH

IM GONNA FUCKING CRY DUDE THE VA FOR MY FAVORITE CHARACTER JUST FOLLOWED ME BACK THIS BIRTHDAY ROCKS!!!

TODAY IS MY 22ND BIRTHDAY!!! JOYOUS TIMES INDEED!!!

A bagel store makes me feel more important than my own fucking mother, ain’t that sad lmfao.

Hoy es el día en que no hablo nada más que español para divertirme con todos mis amigos el día de los inocentes.

You ever just feel like you’re being crushed by your own expectations? I’ve said this enough but I’m writing a book and I’ve done nothing but torment myself every time my feedbackers in my discord just don’t talk ever. I feel like everyone hates my work. This is all I’m good at.

I love being a crippling alcoholic!

Invisible

When the Cold War starts and I have to shoot my radiator.

Chat how did I do? (This plate is for the wifey.)

Nothing like seeing man made horrors beyond my comprehension on Twitter as an AD.

I really just got spammed by bots on Twitter telling me to check out their awesome scam website by talking about LOSING PEOPLE I FUCKING LOVED! Buncha cocksuckers I’m so fucking mad rn.

The absolute disgrace of Twitter.

Just saw a fucking retard ad on Twitter saying “Depression is a choice” and I’ve never wanted to strangle someone so badly in my life. I’ve lost FRIENDS to that how can someone say something like that?! AND WHY IS IT AN AD?! How can ANYONE allow an AD like that on their platform?!

Guys I went to the forest that makes you have multiple pronouns and I accidentally touched some poison ivy. Now I’m it/she…

Republicans be like “Facts don’t care about your favorite mob!”

Done

I miss this place.

Yeah, I’m part of Maga, MAKE AMERICA GAY AGAIN!!!

Most of my time on YouTube is spent learning new recipes and I gotta say this is the most verified Twitter bot ass reply I’ve seen.

British Scott The Woz Wee Chew

Someone with their whole ass dick out just liked one of my posts. I remember when people had common fucking decency and when whoring yourself out was frowned upon.

I like being here, it’s nice.

Why so queerious Batthem? Let’s put some pronouns in that bio of yours.

Chat why is my wife’s ass so fat?! She knocked me off a platform by just bumping into me! I lost so much stuff and she’s laughing her ass off in the next room.

Time to commit tax evasion!

Chat am I cooked?

Got a hit tweet on Twitter chat I’m so sigma.

This game from 2020 still makes gays the old fashioned way.

Chat what if instead of Wandering Vagrant it was Wandering Freakrant and

Happy New Queer everyone!!!

I get this text from my wife as soon as I wake up.

Little did she know… the game was rigged from the start!

Bro’s playing Papa’s Omeletteria.

Not showing her face but I fucking love this beautiful little dingus. She’s so coooooooooool!!!

I love breaking into expensive hotel suites during our honeymoon. Sorry my wife isn’t in the video, she died from a gambling overdose.

My favorite gender of media is when something happens to someone and it cuts to them dead on the floor, see example below.

Ah Twitter, never change.

Y’know something I’m willing to admit is that I fucking DESPISED Fortnite when it first came out cause EVERYONE was playing it, everyone I knew then was playing it, everyone and their mother was playing it! I genuinely got so sick of seeing it lmao.

Chat I’m going insane…

I regret checking Ssundee’s channel.

“Oh man I haven’t watched Ssundee since his murder run and lucky block days! I wonder how he’s doing now?” I asked with joys. I was then shot fifty seven times.

Going to the store now to buy a candle.

Chat my boss just gifted me I think expensive wine so yeah me and my girl gonna get fucked up tonight! Nah fr tho I was planning some pasta and meatballs for tonight so this’ll make a banger centerpiece for us to enjoy.

Chat you’ll NEVER guess what I found!

Republicans be like:

Man I gotta get back to writing Tales of The DragonHeart, all things considered I wanna write more.

Welp I never thought I would randomly start writing robot smut on a Friday night while my girlfriend is out but that’s what boredom does to a mf.

Wait a second… I’m a writer, and a damn good one at that!