Hi little gay boys in my phone! Today is going to be a great day

Having a love surge

Welcome to Derry, girls

same image

To know him is to love him

Good morning, cuties!

Sitting alone on the discord chat waiting for my girls to log on

Off work and it’s Friday and I’m going to forget my job exists and I’m going to be at peace and I’m going to be rejuvenated and I’m going to-

Actually it’s @hippobottomus.bsky.social ‘s fault for giving me a Celsius at 7pm

Thinking about all of the people who accidentally recorded me singing my heart out at Halsey tonight

She’s a diva and she IS the moment

Tonganoxie trade please save me

Espresso martinis might not be the best idea for a Thursday night but life is meant to be enjoyed

Sisters I’m heading straight for the castle

It doesn’t matter if I forgive you if my best friend decides she’s still going to hold onto that grudge. She’s truly a hater for life and I love that for her

@daddyvourdalak.bsky.social rolling his eyes when I want to show him yet another 2 minute video

I honestly wish you all could see what the little phone robots have put on my instagram reels algorithm today

Who wants to get drunk off of wicked margs at chillis?

Just remembered that I didn’t actually have a watermelon lemonade Celsius this afternoon. The crystal ball lied to me

Borealis is a beautiful name for a girl

Work nemesis was fired, is god real??

Stuck somewhere between “I need to get out of this funk” and “this particular funk is valid and justified”

I looked into a crystal ball and saw a watermelon lemonade Celsius in my future

It’s 6 minutes until dinner time and she won’t let me forget it

BREAKING: The Supreme Court rejects a call to overturn its decision legalizing same-sex marriage nationwide.

Hi everyone

If your baby/child needs to be in front of a screen in order for them to not melt down in public then maybe consider feeding your child at home rather than inflicting this on the rest of us

Who wants to go thrifting with me so I can buy all of the silver platters and bowls that they have and we can polish them together and I’ll give you a forehead kiss for helping

I woke up so energized from my death sleep that I don’t know if I should clean my house, play Fortnite, trim my bush, or thrift a bunch of platters for Thanksgiving

I fell asleep at 8:30 last night. This genuinely might be the longest I have ever slept

I had a brief moment today where I thought “I should text dad and let him know that I’m making his favorite soup for dinner tonight” and had to realize yet again that that isn’t an option anymore

here’s a little jonathan bailey to quell your election day anxieties

Coworker sprayed my best friend/other coworker with lavender spray to “clear out the negative energy”

People that sneak whole corn kernels into corn bread deserve the electric chair

We’ll be hosting Thanksgiving for our friends for the 5th year and I have woken up the last 3 mornings just thinking about all of the food I’m going to make

It’s been freezing cold everyday and all of a sudden it’s 78 degrees

365 days to get my waste snatched so I can be Galadriel for Halloween next year

Halloween is tomorrow and I still haven’t finished my costume

Gorgeous gorgeous girl

I need a large iced coffee and a chocolate croissant STAT

I will not watch reels before work I will not watch reels before work I will not watch reels before work I will not watch reels before work

And why shouldn’t I have another spindrift?

Covid herpes monkeys loose in Mississippi sounds right tbh

Just so you know, when you’re mean to me this is who you’re talking to

Omwtby (on my way to bite you)

Someone knows I’m making pumpkin cheesecake cookies

And if I decide to go live in the woods who’s going to come with me

Surely it isn’t normal to feel this level of exhaustion after work

I used to make fun of my brother for always drinking 5 hour energy and yet here I am drinking a Celsius at 7 am

I love fall